Blank on Blank’s animated video features Joni Mitchell in conversation with record executive Joe Smith back in 1986 .

More in Smith’s book Off the Record.

Spotter: Open Culture, via Flashbak … (read more)

Masturbation, says Muslim “televangelist” Mucahid Cihad Han, will make your hands pregnant after you die. Your baby finger puppets will most likely be blind.

Responding to a viewer who admitted to onanism in … (read more)

To Denmark, where Radio24syv is live broadcasting the death of Alan.

Alan is a nine-week-old rabbit being clubbed over the head with a bicycle pump by DJ Asger Juhl.

Asger wants to illustrate the hypocrisy of people who eat meat … (read more)

To the  Wood Buffalo National Park in north eastern Alberta, Canada, where a bear is climbing a power transmission tower to raid a ravens’ nest.

Linda Powell of Greensboro, North Carolina, explains:
“We were in a … (read more)

Xavi, 35, will work as an ambassador for the 2022 World … (read more)

To the Pla-Mor Lanes bowling alley in Decatur, Illinois, where employee Jamie L. Gordon, 30, is spark out on the floor. When she comes to, Jamie says she was hit on … (read more)

In 1947, Trimz made ready-pasted wallpaper for children. “Actual tests have proved that one fly can carry as many as 6,600,000 bacteria!” But with DDT the fly is dead. The bacteria are … (read more)

Transfer Balls presents a round-up of today’s Raheem Sterling news.

The Express lead with news that Liverpool will sell Raheem Sterling if “Arsenal or Man City make a £50m offer”. Readers are told:
The figure being mentioned … (read more)

RIP Terry Sue-Patt, dead at the too-young at 50. You played Benny Green in TV’s brilliant (well, in the early day it was) Grange Hill. You stood up to Gripper in 1978.

I’m not … (read more)

Transfer Balls spots a human centipede of balls in the tabloids. The story in The Metro is that Manchester United are going to buy – get this – Gareth Bale and Cristiano … (read more)

Transfer Balls spots this pile of steaming matter in the Daily Star. Tomas Rosicky is surely on his way out of Arsenal. He’s a terrific player but at 34 years of … (read more)

The documents however will … (read more)

Dave Kidd notes in the Daily Mirror following Sunderland’s status-securing 0-0 draw with … (read more)

Meet Patrick, the “simulated patient that talks to medical students while offering real-time feedback about the virtual prostate exam he’s receiving.” Patrick is the voice of a robotic backside:

Medical Daily reports:
Patrick serves … (read more)

Did you people in Kent and Essex feel the earthquake in middle of the night? The epicentre of the quake measuring 4.2 on the Richter scale was just south of Ramsgate.

What was it like?

Graham … (read more)

London is getting bar ABQ, a venue set in a large RV named after the setting of the TV show Breaking Bad in Albuquerque, New Mexico.

For £30, 22 punters-a-time will not get to sample … (read more)

The naked man stood inside Charlotte Douglas International Airport, North Carolina, didn’t arrive that way. He removed his clothes in reaction to being told his US Airways flight to Jamaica was … (read more)

To New Zealand, where Member of Parliament Ron Mark is addressing the House. The opposing benches are jeering him. He looks their way and speaks softly. What’s that? We didn’t … (read more)

With FA Cup finalists Arsenal and Aston Villa only receiving paltry 25,000 ticket allocations for a game being staged in a 90,000-capacity stadium, fans of both teams have faced something of a … (read more)