Celebrities Category
Celebrity news & gossip from the world’s showbiz and glamour magazines (OK!, Hello, National Enquirer and more). We read them so you don’t have to, picking the best bits from the showbiz world’s maw and spitting it back at them. Expect lots of sarcasm.
The Jimmy Savile doll on sale in Butlins?
IS that the Jimmy Savile doll on sale at a Butlins holiday camp? Buy one and get a free book?
Posted: 14th, October 2012 | In: Celebrities, The Consumer | Comment
‘Jimmy Savile had sex with dead bodies’ says star’s former employer
JIMMY Savile had sex with dead bodies? The rumour has been around for years. Now, however, it’s become a newspaper fornt-page headline. The Sunday Sport yells: “Jimmy Savile had sex with dead bodies.”
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Posted: 14th, October 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comments (3)
Jimmy Savile: Claire McAlpine, George Carman QC and police collusion
JIMMY SAVILE is on two front page this Sunday:
Daily Telegraph: “SAVILE: The police blunders.”
Blunder is kind. Why not collusion?
The Sun: News that as many as 60 girls may have a case against Savile.
Such a shame, isn’t it, that the Sun never had access to Savile’s mobile phone. We might then have found out who aided and abetted Savile. All we have now are the victims and news about who failed to protect them. But we want names, don’t we. We wants to know who knew; who helped; who joined in.
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Posted: 14th, October 2012 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comment
Cheryl Cole recalls meeting Sophie Amoj Amogbokpa
CHERYL Cole has written a book. A few highlights of the nation’s sweethearts tome:
She texts Simon Cowell when he sacks her from the US X Factor:
“F*** you. F*** Fox. F*** Britain’s Got Talent. F*** the orange and purple outfit. F*** big hair. F*** the UK X Factor. F*** you all. I hate you.”
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Posted: 13th, October 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comment
Jimmy Savile’s last words for fellow hated DJ Lord Haw Haw
JIMMY Savile or William Joyce, the wartime Lord Haw Haw – which of them United Kingdom’s most despised DJ?
When Lord Haw Haw signed off, his last braadcast went:
“We are nearing the end of phase one in Europe’s history, but the next will be no happier…I can only say that the people of Britain deserve what they get… You may not hear from me again for a few months…I say ‘Es lebe Deutschland! Heil Hitler! And farewell!'”
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Posted: 13th, October 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comment
Lizzy Jagger mounts a tuna
FEAR not tuna. Lizzy Jagger is here! To draw attention to overfishing, Jagger, 28, has taken off her clothes and mounted a dead yellowfish tuna donated by Waitrose. Yeah. She’s Lady Codiver. It looks more like fetish porn than a call to arms. Still, if freshening up a tuna with your genitals is good for fish stocks, we will not argue. Sadly, a big tuna is pricy. If you want to highlight the perils of overfishing, we suggest something more in keeping with your budget, like a tin of sardines or a squid ring…
Posted: 12th, October 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comment (1)
Jimmy Savile: If only he’d swung his axe like Jimmy Page at Lori Maddox
THE media is great, isn’t it. The very people who say ‘how dare the tabloids not go after a breathing Jimmy Savile’ are the ones who say the tabloids should not publish half truths and be subject to strict guidelines and even stricter libel laws. ‘Jimmy Savile must never happen again,’ they say. ‘Journalists should be licensed,’ they say.
The big problem with journalism is when the writers are fans. Take Jimmy Page, the Led Zepellin guitarist who “dated” a 14-year old child when he was an adult. And look at Michael Hann’s piece in the Guardian on Celebration Day, a film about the band:
Led Zeppelin: ‘There was a swagger – we knew we were good’ – The film Celebration Day captures Led Zeppelin onstage in all their glory in 2007. The band discuss their musical legacy, reputation for excess – and why they will never reunite again.
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Posted: 12th, October 2012 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comments (6)
Nick Clegg meets Bono on bended knee
YOU can forgive Nick Clegg a lot. But then he goes and does the thing that make your cringe: he meets Bono in his London office. If only Nick could be like Bono, saying things to an obsequious audience without fear of having to explain how the great scheme for fairness and peace would work. The journalist / fan / politician nods along. The onderschept popstar prates on. Nick nods and laughs at all the jokes. How Nick would love to be a pop star, a grandees of the platters, living in a stately home or tax haven and talking about distributing wealth and helping the poor . If only he could be like Bono, a stinking rich tax massager who need never explain, just inspire.
The simply Red Singer Mick Hucknell once told us:.
“I’ve said to Tony, ‘You should have waited on Iraq’. He listens.”
Tony Blair was the ultimate pop politico. He had wanted to be a guitarist. He recalls a meeting with President Bill Clinton.
“I like him a lot. We met Chuck Berry and it was a mutual case of ‘Wow!’ Never mind about meeting world leaders, this was a REAL superstar. Meeting Chuck Berry was a great moment for both of us.”
Between 1997 and 2001, Tony Blair’s list of guests at Chequers went:
Sting
Elton John
Bono
David Bowie
Bob Geldof
Mick Hucknall
Lord Attenborough
Joan Collins
Dame Judi Dench
Cilla Black
John Birt
Sir Richard Branson
Delia Smith
Stephen Fry
Kevin Keegan
When Nick Clegg says he wants equality and fairness, he’s an out of touch posh boy. When Bono says it, the politician listens in awe. Poor Nick. Someone give him a guitar…
Posted: 12th, October 2012 | In: Celebrities, Politicians | Comments (2)
Stieg Larsson’s letter to Eva Gabrielsson
STIEG Larsson wrote a letter to his partner, Eva Gabrielsson. On November 9th of 2004, Stieg Larsson died. He was 50. He left behind a letter. The envelope was titled: “To be opened only after my death”.
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Posted: 12th, October 2012 | In: Books, Celebrities | Comments (2)
Kerry Katona on April Jones and David Beckham’s pants
IN Kerry Katona’s Diary for OK! the own-brand supermarket princess says:
“This week my thoughts and prayers are with the family of five-year-old April Jones… On a lighter note, I wish I’d been on that tour of movie stars’ mansions in Beverly Hills last week because I’d have caught David Beckham in his pants.”
Posted: 12th, October 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comment
RIP Alex Karras – Mongo is dead
ALEX Karras died today. He played for the Detroit Lions. He played Hank Sully in Against All Odds. He was George Papadapolis in TV Webster. But above all he was Mongo in Blazing Saddles:
Posted: 11th, October 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comment (1)
Dear Jimmy Savile, thanks for the Michael Jackson tickets
THE Jimmy Savile grave headstone at Woodlands Cemetery in Scarborough has been dismantled. Flowers have been left on the unmarked grave. A note has been left. It reads – and no kidding:
To Jim
Thanks for the good laughs, MJ tickets and most of all the cherry bakewells.
Love Sharon
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Posted: 10th, October 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comment (1)
Charlie Brown and Snoopy to be ruined in new film
HOW do you improve on perfection? Simple answer is that you can’t. So, when dealing with something that is absolutely perfect in every way, you’d better tread carefully around it right?
This is the problem facing 20th Century Fox who are going to make a new feature length animation of Peanuts, the strip that gave us Charles Schulz’s Charlie Brown and Snoopy (and all the other brilliant characters of course. Fight amongst yourselves in your bid to decide who is best).
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Jimmy Savile: The soap on a rope, a board game and tickets to take children all over the country
JIMMY Savile has yet to be dug up and his body beaten with sticks. But his massive gravestone has been removed, his papal knighthood is being revoked (maybe) and charities are ditching his name, Asda has stopped selling his outfit (see below) and Savile’s guide to child minding (we kid you not) and other books are no longer on the syllabus. Savile’s sex shop brick, however, remains in situ. Your writer had only one Jimmy Savile item: a Jim’ll Fix It soap on a rope. Never did use it. Chances are that the rope would have sagged and snapped, sending the soap tumbling to the floor…
All this was made possible by the BBC endorsing a man who, as many allege, was a sexual deviant to preyed on underage girls. Who knew about Jimmy ‘Top Of the Pops’ Savile? And wha did we have to wait until the knighted gibberer was dead before the truth came out?
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Posted: 10th, October 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comment
Stevie Nicks wants to strangle Minaj
AFTER Nicki Minaj apparently threatened to shoot Mariah Carey (as well as showcasing one of the single most annoying voices in human history), Stevie Nicks of Fleetwood Mac has decided to get involved.
And she’s not happy.
Stevie – a massive fan of scarves and hippie nonsense – threw her hat into the American Idol ring and, from the sound of it, is cracking her aged knuckles and getting ready for smackdown.
“How dare this little girl!,” Nicks ranted to The Daily about the Starships rapper. “If I had been Mariah I would have walked over to Nicki and strangled her to death right there.”
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Posted: 10th, October 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comment (1)
Laughing woman beater Justin Lee Collins escaped jail because he never tweeted his abuse
THEY say no publicity is bad. So. Give it up for TV presenter and comic Justin Lee Collins. The Times has a photo of Collins laughing minutes after a judge sentenced him to 140 hours of “humbling” community work. He must also pay the prosecution costs of £3,500. (The photo on the left is of him leaving court after the verdict.)
His crime? Well, his ex-lover, one Anna Larke, told St Albans Crown Court that Collins made her sleep facing him, spat at her, made her list every sexual encounter she had ever had. Collins said Ms Larke was a liar. Collins said he hit Larke to stop her from self-harming.
How did they meet? Collins had been having an extra-martial affair with Larke. They broke up. But after his marriage failed, Collins and Larke hooked up again. Their relationship went badly.
He was recorded telling her:
“You fucked up at the pub. When you’re fucking with me, you look at the fucking ground, you look at a tree, you look at a bench, you look at any fucking inanimate object, you do not look at any other fucking human being, you slag, do you understand?”
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Posted: 10th, October 2012 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comments (5)
Morrissey showcases his sense of humour on the Colbert Report
IN this video Morrissey showcases his sense of humour on the Colbert Report:
Posted: 10th, October 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comment
Why did the Catholic Church and The Queen make Jimmy Savile a knight? (The Gary Glitter video)
WAS Princess Diana’s pal Jimmy Savile given a papal knighthood before or after it was known he had sexually abused scores of children? Did they require evidence? A conviction?
The latest news on Savile, is that having lost his gravestone in Scarborough, the Roman Catholic Church are mulling on whether to strip the BBC star of his paler knighthood, granted in 1990 by the late Pope John Paul II.
The police’s Operation Yewtree is looking at 120 lines of inquiry. There might be as many as 30 female victims. Savile is already accused of two rapes and six of indecent assaults.
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Posted: 10th, October 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comment (1)
Jimmy Savile book of the day: Other People’s Children – A Handbook for Child Minders
JIMMY Savile book of the day: Other People’s Children – a Handbook for Child Minders”… Previously: Love Is An Uphill Thing and Benjamin Rabbit and the Stranger Danger…
Spotter: Dangerous Minds
Posted: 10th, October 2012 | In: Books, Celebrities | Comments (5)
Jimmy Savile’s gravestone is removed – chip shop owners clean the walls
IT is, of course, what he would have wanted. Jimmy Savile’s massive gravestone in Scarborough is to be demolished. That’s the gigantic headstone with the spelling mistake- the one that says Savile is “Chieftan of Locheber Highland Games”.
The stone will not be smashed to smithereens by outraged former fans. His family will remove it “out of respect for public opinion”.
The statement runs:
“Out of respect to public opinion, to those who are buried there, and to those who tend their graves and visit there, we have decided to remove it.”
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Posted: 9th, October 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comments (3)
Judy Garland’s Wizard of Oz dress goes under the hammer
C’MON lads. Here’s yer chance. The dress that Judy Garland wore in the Wizard of Oz film will be auctioned in Beverly Hills on November 9th and 10th at the Icons and Idols event. The gingham dress and white puff-sleeve blouse could be yours for £310,000 or thereabouts….
Posted: 9th, October 2012 | In: Film, The Consumer | Comment
Doll of the day: Belle Rosen in the Poseidon Adventure
DOLL of the day: Belle Rosen in the Poseidon Adventure. Warning: chocking Hazard.
More doll faces:
Posted: 9th, October 2012 | In: Celebrities, The Consumer | Comment
Jimmy Savile Book of the day: ‘Love Is An Uphill Thing’
JIMMY Savile book of the day: “The rags-to-riches autobiography of JIMMY SAVILE OBE – LOVE IS AN UPHILL THING.”
Previously in Jimmy Savile books.
Posted: 9th, October 2012 | In: Books, Celebrities | Comment (1)
Lady Gaga meets Julian Assage
WHEN Lady Gaga met Julian Assange at the Ecuadorean embassy, London, she did not spend the night. They talked and they talked but Gaga did she fall asleep:
Posted: 9th, October 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comment
