Celebrities Category
Celebrity news & gossip from the world’s showbiz and glamour magazines (OK!, Hello, National Enquirer and more). We read them so you don’t have to, picking the best bits from the showbiz world’s maw and spitting it back at them. Expect lots of sarcasm.
Mel Gibson’s own stepmother Teddy Joye Hicks Gibson get restraining order against him
TROUBLED is a word that has followed Mel Gibson around for some time now. When he’s not on-tape going postal, or indeed, threatening his ex with all-manner of vile things, he’s pottering around with a beaver grafted to his hand and glaring at everyone like a reanimated corpse.
And now, Gibbo’s own stepmother has filed for a temporary restraining order against him, claiming he’s been acting like a “wild man” in her presence and represents an imminent physical threat.
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Posted: 3rd, July 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comment
Meet Doug Pitt – Brad Pitt’s brother lives the high life
COOL ad of the day features Doug Pitt, brother to Brad Pitt, in the Fair Go Bro campaign for Virgin Mobile Australia. Doug Pitt is “the second most famous Pitt in his family”. The ad gives him “a taste of his brother’s lifestyle”:
Doug’s just a regular guy.
He washes his own car, pays his own bills, and does his own laundry. You see, unlike his famous bro, Doug’s never been the star of anything.
Spotter: Adfreak, Laughing Squid
Posted: 3rd, July 2012 | In: Celebrities, The Consumer | Comment
The best movie laughs ever – video
A COLLECTION of movie laughs. Can you name the films? Would you want to marry an actor who can laugh on cry on cue?
Cliff Richard pays tribute to Seb Coe at Olympic Torch rally (photo)
WHAT’S Sir Cliff Richard up to now that he’s been effectively banned from singing to the rain soaked masses at Wimbledon’s Centre Court thanks to a retractable roof? Why, he’s been pulling on his lurid tracksuit top and shorty shorts to run with the Olympic Torch – now 75 years into its odyssey.
Here’s Cliff paying tribute to Seb Coe, allegedly:
Posted: 2nd, July 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comment
Lauryn Hill doesn’t pay tax and gives peculiar reasons for not doing so, while looking at prison
EVEN though Lauryn Hill possibly made the greatest debut album of all time, she’s still as mad as a bag of talking rocks. She’s been collared for not paying her taxes and she went to her website to explain why. She said she withdrew from society to keep herself and her family safe from popular culture’s “climate of hostility, false entitlement, manipulation, racial prejudice, sexism and ageism.”
“Over-commercialization and its resulting restrictions and limitations can be very damaging and distorting to the inherent nature of the individual,” Hill wrote. “I did not deliberately abandon my fans, nor did I deliberately abandon any responsibilities, but I did however put my safety, health and freedom and the freedom, safety and health of my family first over all other material concerns! I also embraced my right to resist a system intentionally opposing my right to whole and integral survival.”
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Posted: 2nd, July 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comment
Scientologist spies sent to follow Katie Holmes after Tom Cruise split
OVER the weekend, the New York Post ran one of the most wonderfully salacious articles ever written about Scientology, Katie Holmes and Tom Cruise. If you don’t want to read it all, it’s claimed that Holmes was groomed to be Tom’s wife and signed a 5-year contract to be his missus, with a $3million yearly bonus for staying with him, and of course, those 5-years are now up.
Of course, Scientology gossip is pop-culture catnip and the stories are going to be numerous over the coming weeks as everyone stands around muttering about how weird it all is.
And now, it is claimed that there has been Scientology spies deployed to stalk Holmes after she filed for divorce on Thursday in NYC, citing irreconcilable differences and seeking sole custody of the couple’s daughter Suri (there’s a whole other conspiracy theory surrounding Suri’s parentage, but we’ll save that for another time).
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Posted: 2nd, July 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comments (3)
Police leak Rihanna photo to TMZ, but get off the hook?
LEAKING pictures to the press is, obviously, very common indeed. If you get them by hacking an email, you’ll get thrown in prison. But what happens if you’re two police officers? Well, there’s a whole issue of betrayal of trust, misusing a position of power and, generally speaking, acting immorally when you’re supposed to be a moral guardian.
Well, the two cops who allegedly leaked the photo of Rihanna after she was assaulted by Chris Brown will not face criminal charges, officials have said.
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Posted: 2nd, July 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comment
Catelynn Lowell and Tyler Baltierra endure phantom pregnancy
IS Catelynn Lowell expecting a baby with Tyler Baltierra? Catelynn and Tyler a engaged to be married. But are they having a child? Catelynn and Tyler have just finished filming season 4 of Teen Mom. So. Is she pregnant? At times like these we turn to the trusty tabloids:
Posted: 2nd, July 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comment
The funniest, meanest, dumbest tweets on Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes’ divorce
PEOPLE can be cruel. And funny. These are the funniest, meanest, dumbest tweets on Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes’ divorce:
Posted: 1st, July 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comment
The Tom Cruise Katie Holmes Love Story – in pictures from Xenu with love
SO. Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes are to divorce. When we saw Tom Cruise bounce around on the Oprah Winfrey show as he enthused wildly about his young lover, the actress Katie Holmes, we thought that very soon she’d be pregnant or in intensive care. Eight weeks after their first date, he took her to the Eiffel Tower and proposed.
A marriage ensued.
In Odescalchi Castle, Italy, the best man, Scientology headboy David Miscavige oozed:
“While through the ages many a tale has immortalised eternal love – most especially Rome and Juliet – this one is truly unique…If there was no tale of greater woe than Juliet to her Romeo, there is no greater joy than the tale of Tom and Kate today. And yes, it too is forever.”
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Posted: 1st, July 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comment
Victoria Beckham auditions for Sesame Street
VICTORIA Beckham is seen auditioning for the new musical Spice Girls do Sesame Street.
Four of these kids belong together, four of these kids are kind of the same… One of these kids got a new career, four of these kids are doing the same…
There’s always one:
Posted: 1st, July 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comment
Steve Martin’s fan letter is uniformly charming
HOW does Steve Martin respond to fan letters? With this letter:
Posted: 30th, June 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comment
World collapses in shock as Snoop Dogg gets detained in possession of weed
STONERS are fantastically forgetful aren’t they? You can imagine that, half of the time they get nicked while in possession, they’ve completely forgotten they had some weed about their person at all. It must be a brief rollercoaster of emotion – ‘Uh! I where d’ya find that! Wait. I’m being lectured by a cop. What was I doing again?’
The poor buggers.
And famous toker, Snoop Dogg, has found himself in some bother after getting stopped by Norwegian customs reeking of skunk.
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Posted: 30th, June 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comment
How Prince William nearly married a dead woman
HEADY times in the Sir Richard Branson household. This morning, Branson was accepting a bottle of champagne on Folkstone Beach, Kent, after he had to abandon an attempt to set at least two world records by kite-surfing across the English Channel. The Virgin boss had hoped to become the oldest person to cross the Channel by kite-surf and to make the fastest crossing by a kite-surfing team.
Accompanied by his son Sam, nephews and friends, the 61-year-old left Wimereux in northern France at midday and aimed to successfully make the 30-mile journey to the Kent coast in around two and a half hours. But as he was half-way across, Sir Richard, who turns 62 next month, realised his kite was too small and he had to turn back to France while his friends and family continued. There was joy, however, for his son Sam who became the fastest person to kite-surf solo across the Channel when he reached Folkestone in two hours and 18 minutes, beating the previous record set in 1999 by 12 minutes.
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Posted: 30th, June 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comment
The 12 Worst Pop Music Lyrics Ever
SHOULD the dancing and the singing and the breeding not work out for her, Britney Spears is showing signs of being a pretty good lyricist.
Speaking through the tears on a TV interview, Britney is heard to say:
“It’s bad. I’m sad.”
In your face, Chris de Burgh, who notoriously rhymed “dance” with “romance” in his seminal hit Lady In Red.
Anorak has delved into the pop archives and now brings you the 10 Worst Rhymes In Pop. Chins up, Britney, you may yet be great:
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Posted: 30th, June 2012 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comments (14)
Why Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes are splitting Suri down the middle
AND so after almost five years of marriage, Katie Holmes and Tom Cruise are going to split Suri down the middle. As People reports:
After five years of marriage, Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes are getting a divorce, PEOPLE has learned exclusively. “This is a personal and private matter for Katie and her family,” says Holmes’s attorney Jonathan Wolfe. “Katie’s primary concern remains, as it always has been, her daughter’s best interest.”
They got the portmanteau name: TomKat. They got a baby: Suri (obey her!). Thy got matching bowl cut hair dos. And then they got a divorce. Why? Well, she stopped looking like a boy, allegedly….
Posted: 29th, June 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comment (1)
Rachel Zoe introduces the witless Skyler Zoe
RACHEL Zoe, stylist to the stars (Cameron Diaz and Demi Moore) tells OK! about life with her 15-month-old son:
“Every minute I have to I have to buy things for my son. IY;s too much fun. It’s like dressing a living doll. He has no opinion.”
The witless child, is called Skyler. But let’s call him Cliff. No. Timothy.
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Posted: 29th, June 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comment
$1million for Chris Brown versus Drake in a boxing ring
DESPITE the fact Chris Brown and Drake are two of the lamest humans on the planet, barely able to fight their way out of a sleeping bag, they’ve been indulging themselves in a good ol’ fashioned beef. Or, more accurately in this case, a ‘Quorn’.
After throwing nasty looks at each other, doing some snide tweets and sending a few bottles up into the air in a nightclub, the world has fixed its glare on them to see if they’ll actually do anything interesting. Ever.
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Posted: 28th, June 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comment
Katie Price used Alex Reid’s anus as a vodka bottle holder
KATIE Price’s week in quotes, as told by Now! magazine:
Q: “What’s the rudest thing you’ve ever done in the name of love?”
Katie Price: “I fucked Alex [Reid] up the arse with a vodka bottle.”
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Posted: 28th, June 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comment
That official London Olympics anthem by Muse: They’re no Meatloaf
READY for that official London Olympics anthem by Muse? Have a listen. What do you think of it?
Our review: bring back Meatloaf:
Linkin Park and Bieber battle it out to rule supreme over worst week in music, ever
COULD we be in the middle of the worst week in music ever? You may be able to think of other lousy periods in music history, but this one looks unbeatable. Want the evidence? Let us look at the chart.
Apparently, Linkin Park’s fifth studio album Living Things has topped the midweek album chart, ousting Justin Bieber from his lofty position. Linkin Park (pictured). Justin Bieber. It’s like choosing between Hepatitis B or C.
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Lucy Horobin helped Harry Styles with his Johnny Ball impression
LUCY Horobin, 32, is rumoured to have had sex with One Direction haircut Harry Styles, 18. (Styles was the subject of the newspaper headline: “One Direction’s Hair Wows New York Crowd”.) Horobin is a married thirtysomething who works as a DJ on Heart South Coast FM. She presents the easy listening Smooth Classics programme.
The story goes that Lucy, married to Oliver, 31, met Harry at Manchester’s Key 103 — her former radio station in, where she presented the In:Demand show. It is claimed that Styles squired Horobin while or before he was swapping pillows with Xtra Factor host Caroline Flack, 32.
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Posted: 28th, June 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comment
Ke$ha tells her lips to “SUCK IT” – tattoos of command
JOHN Travolta look-alike Ke$ha has used her Twatter to showcase her new tattoo – a legend on her inner lips that says “SUCK IT”. This follows on from Miley Cyrus’s tattoo, the one by her diaphragm that says “Just breathe”.
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Posted: 27th, June 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comment
RIP Nora Ephron: She understood Stieg Larsson’s The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo
RIP NORA EPHRON. Not only did she write the greatest rom-com ever – When Harry Met Sally – but also this paropdy of Stieg Larsson’s The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo for the The New Yorker:
The Girl Who Fixed The Umlaut
Salander opened the door a crack and spent several paragraphs trying to decide whether to let Blomkvist in. Many italic thoughts flew through her mind. Go away. Perhaps. So what. Etc.
“Please,” he said. “I must see you. The umlaut on my computer isn’t working.”
He was cradling an iBook in his arms. She looked at him. He looked at her. She looked at him. He looked at her. And then she did what she usually did when she had run out of italic thoughts: she shook her head.
“I can’t really go on without an umlaut,” he said. “We’re in Sweden.”
But where in Sweden were they? There was no way to know, especially if you’d never been to Sweden. A few chapters ago, for example, an unscrupulous agent from Swedish Intelligence had tailed Blomkvist by taking Stora Essingen and Gröndal into Södermalm, and then driving down Hornsgatan and across Bellmansgatan via Brännkyrkagatan, with a final left onto Tavastgatan. Who cared, but there it was, in black-and-white, taking up space. And now Blomkvist was standing in her doorway.
Ok, already. Here you are:
I was about six months younger than everyone else in my class, and so for about six months after it began, for six months after my friends had begun to develop (that was the word we used, develop), I was not particularly worried. I would sit in the bathtub and look down at my breasts and know that any day now, any second now, they would start growing like everyone else’s. They didn’t. “I want to buy a bra,” I said to my mother one night. “What for?” she said. My mother was really hateful about bras, and by the time my third sister had gotten to the point where she was ready to want one, my mother had worked the whole business into a comedy routine. “Why not use a Band-Aid instead?” she would say. It was a source of great pride to my mother that she had never even had to wear a brassiere until she had her fourth child, and then only because her gynecologist made her. It was incomprehensible to me that anyone could ever be proud of something like that. It was the 1950s, for God’s sake. Jane Russell. Cashmere sweaters. Couldn’t my mother see that? “I am too old to wear an undershirt.” Screaming. Weeping. Shouting. “Then don’t wear an undershirt,” said my mother. “But I want to buy a bra.” “What for?”
Posted: 27th, June 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comment
Even more claims appear about John Travolta!
ONE imagines that there are now people in newsrooms that work 9-5 trying to keep track of all the developments concerning John Travolta. It appears there’s a country’s worth of people queueing up to talk about his genitals, his penchant for foisting his arousal on people and general claims of his homosexuality.
Just imagine if Travolta came out and spoiled it for everyone by saying ‘Fine! FINE! Me and my wife have an open relationship and I’m bisexual! SOZ!‘ Still, that wouldn’t clear up the whole alleged sexual assaults.
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Posted: 27th, June 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comments (3)
