Celebrities Category
Celebrity news & gossip from the world’s showbiz and glamour magazines (OK!, Hello, National Enquirer and more). We read them so you don’t have to, picking the best bits from the showbiz world’s maw and spitting it back at them. Expect lots of sarcasm.
Amy Childs knows what killed Whitney Houston
AMY Childs says her “life is a living hell”. And:
“I understand what happened to Whitney”.
Can it be that the easy-wipe champion of vapid talentless idiocy sees a kindred spirit in Whitney Houston, a woman who was not defined by her private life and primary sexual characteristics, but by her incredible talent that shone a light into her essential self?
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 22nd, February 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comments (2)
For sale: Box Canvas Print of Paul Ross (with added priceless comments)
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 22nd, February 2012 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comments (4)
Multi-millionaire Surrey girl show off Adele swears at the ‘suits’
DID you see Adele stick her middle finger up after winning Best Album at the Brits? Adle explained that her sweary digit was for “the suits, not the fans”.
As she said:
“Can I just say sorry for swearing? I flung the middle finger at the suits, not the fans, I want people to know that. Sorry if I offended anyone, but the people in suits offended me. I wasn’t swearing at the fans, but I didn’t get to complete my thank you speech!”
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 22nd, February 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comment (1)
The Brits 2012: winners, hair and photos
The Brit Awards 2012 – the winners, hair – it’s all about the hair (Damon Albarn?) – and photos:
12839465
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 21st, February 2012 | In: Music | Comments (5)
Lindsay Lohan beat Miss Piggy to Elizabeth Taylor role
LINDAY Lohan is to play the part of Elizabeth Taylor in Lifetime’s made-for-TV biopic Elizabeth & Richard: A Love Story. No Taylor’s wide-load hair or iris-blue eyes. Lohan will play all of Taylor.
Lohan is turning into the Judge Judy reject who can play every Hollywood great. Having done Marilyn Monroe for Playboy, and now Liz Taylor for Lifetime, Lohan will soon be doing impressions of other Hollywood legends. She’s already had a stab at Ghandi. Who can forget when Lohan went to India for Lindsay Lohan’s Indian Journey , a charity-driven travelogue in which for reasons never explained oe just unfathomable to even the producers, the Herbie Fully Loaded star was sent to India to expose the country’s problem with child exploitation. Of course, the children ended up comforting Lohan, who looked like she needed it.
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 21st, February 2012 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comments (2)
Chris Brown and Rihanna use domestic violence to further their careers
YOU may be disgusted and horrified at the fact Chris Brown assaulted Rihanna for a prolonged period 3 years ago, but that doesn’t mean anyone else does. In fact, the entertainment industry – as beleaguered as it is – is more than happy to use domestic violence as a way of selling records.
See, even though there’s still court orders in place on Brown to stop him from seeing Rihanna, that’s not stopped them musically collaborating.
Breezy appears on Rihanna’s ‘Birthday Cake’ remix and Ri returned the favour by appearing on a remix of his new track, ‘Turn Up the Music.’
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 21st, February 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comment
Face of the Day: Susan Boyle and her Wee Box
FACE of the day: Susan Boyle. Stick her in a silly hat, write “WEEBOX” on it and giggle up your sleeve…
Posted: 21st, February 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comment (1)
Whitney Houston wanted to marry Michael Jackson
WANT to know how Whitney Houston really died? The National Enquirer has news. It knows how Whitney Houston “really died”. It says so on its front cover.
Whitney’s death has become a media sub-industry. The height of concern was emitted by one Danyl Johnson, an X Factor contestant who said on Facebook:
“I know that Whitney Houston & I didn’t see eye to eye, but another legend is lost.”
David Gest, a man without whom a celebrity death is incomplete, follows his words and TV documentary on Michael Jackson by telling Sun readers:
I FLEW out to Whitney’s home town of Newark on Friday to pay my respects at her memorial service the following day. My good friend of over 40 years, Whitney’s cousin Dionne Warwick, was Mistress of Ceremonies, presiding over the whole event. I have to say, no one could have done a better job…Afterwards she confided in me that she nearly broke down at one point. But she said: “I knew in my heart I had to hold it together.”…Whitney told me she could always confide in Pat [sister-in-law and manager Pat Houston] and nothing was ever leaked to the Press.
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 21st, February 2012 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comment
Robert Pattinson quits Twilight franchise (Berlin photos)
TWEENS! Prepare to cry all the water out of your body. Why? Robert Pattinson – officially the dullest human on the face of this Earth – is not going to play Edward Cullen anymore in the Twilight films. Cut THAT into your arm with your Hello Kitty geometry set.
That’s right kiddies – if Stephenie Meyer writes more Twilight books and they’re made into movies, R Pattz won’t be involved.
Despite being roughly as charismatic as an old Vileda Supermop in a skip, Pattz isn’t daft enough to diss the franchise. Rather, he’s just thinking logistics. That’s because he’s so criminally boring.
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 20th, February 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comments (3)
People want compensating for Whitney Houston’s death
WHEN Whitney Houston died, everyone was hit by it. The fans mourned. Pop fans were plain ol’ shocked. Everyone was annoyed that everyone was talking about her, suspicious that everyone was indulging in some grief tourism, suddenly Houston’s number one fan, now that she was dead.
However, there’s another group of people who feel particularly aggrieved by it all – those are the guests staying at the Beverly Hilton Hotel the day Whitney Houston died.
They say that their stay was a lesson in abject horror, made unbearable by the commotion that surrounded the singer’s death. Furthermore, they’re cheesed off because the hotel has done nothing to address their dissatisfaction. That’d be the dissatisfaction brought about by an unforeseeable, remarkable event.
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 20th, February 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comments (3)
Michelle Duggar’s tips for women who want to keep their man: give him sex on demand
MICHELLE Duggar has created the tip sheet “Seven Basic Needs Of A Husband”. In readiness for a new series of her TV show 19 Kids and Counting (after 20, she’s pout of fingers and toes and counting genitals) , Duggar has tops on how you can be like her:
Via Faith Goes Pop, we learn:
1. A husband needs a wife who respects him as a man.How does a wife destroy her husband’s manliness?
A. By expecting him to know what protection you need
1. Physical
2. Spiritual
3. Mental
4. Emotional
Tell your husband how he can protect you.B. By being financially independent
1. Love is killed by self-sufficiency
2. Whoever controls the money controls the leadership.
Center your work and your ministry in your home.C. By giving greater loyalty to outside leadership
1. Pastor and church leaders
2. Men and women Bible teachers
3. Relatives and friends
Ask your husband your spiritual questions.D. By resisting his decisions in your spirit
1. A wife’s spirit controls her husband’s ambitions
2. Reviewing past failure destroys a husband’s self-worth.
Learn to wisely appeal to your husbandE. By resisting his physical affection
1. This is the unspoken crushing of a man’s spirit.
2. A wife’s Godliness is a powerful guard against her husband’s abuse of … [cuts off]
Hey, a woman with 19 children can’t be wrong about anything…
Posted: 20th, February 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comments (3)
Whitney Houston’s funeral: Bobby Brown, Mel Gibson and Kevin Costner’s tribute to Kevin Costner
WHITNEY Houston’s funeral starred Bobby Brown in the role of chief newsworthy event. TMZ reports that the New Edition singer and former Mr Whitney Bobby wanted to sit next to his daughter Bobbi Kristina in the front row. But Whitney’s relatives were not in agreement. So. After 15 minutes, he left, taking with him his NINE guests.
This was Whitney Houston’s funeral, which whilst being a private one, was also streamed live.
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 19th, February 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comment
Katie Price unveils her new alter ego: Mars
IS Katie Price pregnant by Leandro Penna? No.
Says Katie:
‘Omg @leandro__penna and @abbi1985 and myself have pigged out on junk food tonight hahahaha lol.’
Not only has Katie Price’s her stomach become distended but also her navel has turned into a mug.
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 19th, February 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comment
Adele’s dad Mark Evans tells all – Penny Adkins remains stoic
THE knives are out for Adele. While the Daily Star leads with news of that alleged sex tape – the Mail leads with news of her estranged dad. When she accepted her six Grammy Awards, Adele thanked her mother, Penny Adkins, who had her when a teenager and raised her on her own.
Meanwhile, Adele’s dad, Mark Evans was “watching television in the sitting room of his small home on a housing estate in Bridgend, South Wales“.
Juxtaposed to the glamour of American awards do, Mark Evans’s location seeks to establish him as the loser. He then speaks:
“When she sings, it’s so beautiful, but it brings back too many memories. It’s too painful. There’s so much regret on my part — regret that I wasn’t a better father to her. I let her down badly, and I wish I could turn the clock back and do things differently.”
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 18th, February 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comments (4)
Iron Sky: A feeble sense of humour means Nazis will love it
THE Berlinale film festival has given a platform to Iron Sky, the Finnish film in which moon-living Nazis invade Earth
It’s 2018 and the Nazis are zooming back to Earth for one final dash at conquest. As Werner Von Braun said: “Vot gos up musst kom down.”
Director Timo Vuorensola told The Wall Street Journal:
“It’s a funny thing, you make a movie about Moon Nazis and the people who get offended are the Americans. I was expecting the Germans to take it badly… I find that when you make fun of Americans, but you aren’t an American, it’s not always accepted.”
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 17th, February 2012 | In: Film | Comment (1)
Livestream of Whitney Houston’s star-studded Funeral irks fans
THE funeral of Whitney Houston will be streamed live on the internet for all to see. The basic premise is that people who wouldn’t normally get the chance to grieve at the funeral will be able to send their thoughts from afar. Quite simple really and an idea that is becoming more common.
However, some fans of late superstar are thoroughly unhappy that there will be a broadcast of the funeral, with some going as far as saying the whole thing is ‘vile’. The funeral will be taking place tomorrow (Feb 18th), and one fan tweeted about the ‘show’: “What is wrong with people? Why are they gonna broadcast Whitney Houston’s funeral on CNN? That should be private” while another added: “Who the hell would want to watch Whitney Houston’s funeral live on the internet? Vile and disgusting.”
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 17th, February 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comment
Property porn: photos of Christina Aguilera’s $13.5m home
PROPERTY porn time, readers. Feast your eyes on photos of Christina Aguilera’s $13.5m home. (The fabled Pygmy depilation chamber reamins frustratingly out of shot.)
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 17th, February 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comment
Face of the Day – Ronnie Corbett gets a CBE
FACE of the Day: Queen Elizabeth II presents Ronnie Corbett with his Commander of the British Empire (CBE) medal during an Investiture ceremony at Buckingham Palace in central London…
Posted: 16th, February 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comment
Bankrupt Gary Busey down to his last two tambourines
TMZ reports that Gary Busey is almost broke. He’s filed for Chapter 7 bankruptcy, claiming to owe $508,600.96 in debt (including $451k to the tax man).
The site then lists Busey’s assets: 2 tvs, DVD player, old large tape recorder, small tape recorder, boom box, bookends, 50 hardback books, 100 compact discs, 300 VHS tapes, 100 DVDs, 200 cassette tapes, painting of an Indian, old bull’s head, 5 pairs of old moccasins, 2 small decorative teepees, 4 clay vases, Indian style bowls, small figurine of bald eagle, old bows and arrows, fabric strap with an attached eagle talon, beaded necklace with an attached arrowhead, broken pellet gun, Rollerblades, 2 old surf boards, boogie board, old mountain bike, old Nikon film camera, five guitars, two tambourines and his mum’s piano.
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 16th, February 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comment
Rumer Willis now denying that Demi Moore is ‘fine’
SHE’S looked like a woman on the ropes for a while, so it wasn’t exactly a surprise when Demi Moore was taken to hospital. Everyone assumed it was a mixture of stress (in the exact same shape as Ashton Kutcher) and drugs (probably fancy celebrity drugs like cocaine and ground up griffin bones), but no-one ever suspected she’d be whisked off to A&E after taking laughing gas.
There was brief good news when Rumer Willis said that Demi was “on the road to recovery”. However, now, Rumer has denied ever making the comment.
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 16th, February 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comment
Whitney Houston knew she was going to die, like you (but not Princess Diana)
WHITNEY Houston’s death occupies just two front pages today:
The Daily Star has the scoop, though, leading with the prescient:
“WHITNEY KNEW SHE WAS GOING TO DIE”
You could pretty much replace the word “Whitney” with that of any dead star, apart from Princess Diana, obviously, and it would ring true.
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 16th, February 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comments (2)
Whitney Houston: every reason why she died
WHY did Whitney Houston die? Well, they say it was: murder, prohibition, the war on drugs, Jews, she’s alive, Al Qaeda, Tina Turner swapped the bodies, sedatives, a lesbian in the bath tub, gay sex torment, Nancy Grace’s killer mermaids, drowning, Od’d on drugs, suicide, to see Jesus, twitter, Xanax and alcohol, the curse of fame, drugs…
Posted: 16th, February 2012 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comment
Victoria Beckham grabs David Beckham by the balls – photo
NEVER one to miss the chance to explain the secret of their amay-zing love for one another, Victoria Beckham is pictured on Becks’ Facebook page holding young David by the balls. When we last saw Vicky, she was telling us that the secret to their incredible marriage was her sitting on him:
“We were at a party the other day at my mum’s house and I was sitting on his lap. We’re very affectionate. And I looked at him and thought after being married for 11 years – we were the only couple who were even near each other at the party.”
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 16th, February 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comment (1)
Kate Upton wears her own knickers
KATE Upton, Sports Illustrated’s cover girl will not be a Victoria’s Secret model and walk up and down and down and up wearing borrowed knickers and bra, and pretending to be a carnival float. The New York Times hears Victoria Secret’s casting director and editor-in-chief of 10 magazine Sophia Neophitou explain in her considered way:
“We would never use [Kate Upton for a Victoria’s Secret show]. She is too obvious. She’s like a Page 3 girl. She’s like a footballer’s wife, with the too-blond hair and that kind of face that anyone with enough money can go out and buy.”
Sophia is English and therefore a rose – full of thorns and a bit hippy.
Posted: 15th, February 2012 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comment
Chris Brown says sorry to everyone by telling the whole world to ‘F*** Off!’
WHY is Chris Brown getting so beaten up by the press? It’s because he beat Rihanna up and it was gruesome. Of course, we’re sensitive people who are willing to give a second chance, provided there is a glimmer of remorse and learning in amongst the celebrity bravado.
And so, after his Grammy win, Breezy thought he’d tweet everyone this thoughtful, lovely message:
“HATE ALL U WANT BECUZ I GOT A GRAMMY Now! That’s the ultimate F**K OFF!”
Ah.
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 15th, February 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comment
