Celebrities Category
Celebrity news & gossip from the world’s showbiz and glamour magazines (OK!, Hello, National Enquirer and more). We read them so you don’t have to, picking the best bits from the showbiz world’s maw and spitting it back at them. Expect lots of sarcasm.
Josh Dubovie Sings For The UK’s Estate Agents At Eurovsion: In Pictures And Video
EUROVISION: Josh Dubovie will sign this year’s British entry in the song for Europe. The 19-year-old from Basildon won BBC1’s ‘Eurovision: Your Country Needs You’, warbling the Mike Stock and Pete Waterman penned song – oh, the irony – ‘That Sounds Good To Me‘ before a panel of judges.
Dubrovie’s impression of an estate agent at the Christmas do was only bettered when Heidi Range from the Sugababes showed off her engagement ring. Says Dubovie: “I really believe I can go on to win the Eurovision Song Contest for us.” Yep, he does jokes as well… He’d never have beaten them.
“The final dest-tinayyyytion, sounds a celebraytiiiiiion….”
8504284
Posted: 13th, March 2010 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comment (1)
‘Unpatriotic’ Cheryl Cole Back With Heroic Ashley: Pictures
ASHLEY Cole And Cheryl Cole Divorce: Ashley jets back to Surrey, patriotic men line up for a revenge shag and Vicki Gough, Sonia Wild, Brooke Healy and Alexandra Taylor – but not Cheryl Cole – are considered for OBEs.
The Daily Star has huge news that Ashley Cole has begged Cheryl to take him back. As the front-page headline screams:
“ASH BEGS CHERYL: TAKE ME BACK”
Anything else?
“I’ll change, sobbing ace tells missus”
Ashley will change his pulling knickers, alleged, and his ways. This news from a “source”, via the tabloids to you, the reader. This sensation is trumped by the Sun’s front-page, which moves the reunion one stop on:
“ASHLEY HOME TO CHERYL”
Or as the Mirror’s front-page puts it:
“Ashley sneaks back for Cheryl reunion”
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 13th, March 2010 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comment (1)
Hurt Locker’s Jeremy Renner Dates George Clooney’s Mother
NOT since Anderson Cooper showed up in public with the muscle-bound manager of a successful New York gay bar has such a fuss been made over the sexuality of a public feature.
Ever since actor Jeremy Renner got kudos – and an Oscar nomination – for his performance in The Hurt Locker, the sex detectives have been all over the poor guy.
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 13th, March 2010 | In: National Enquirer | Comments (2)
In Pictures: Jennifer Ansiton ‘Insulted’ By Gerard Butler ‘Trimmed Bush’ Rumours
JENNIFER Aniston and her The Bounty co-star Gerard Butler are at it on the red carpet and the tabloids go wild.
Gerard Butler appeared to frot Aniston in the manner of a Japanese middle-ranking executive stood amid a school outing on the Tokyo subway (we’ve been – it’s grim). Aniston stroked and fluttered her lashes and looked enraptured.
And the tabloids do what is expected of them:
GERARD BUTLER has hinted he and JENNIFER ANISTON are more than just Friends – The Sun
Says Jen:
“He’s so funny and handsome. I’ve made a note to myself to have more of this.”
Gerard Butler and Jennifer Aniston say they’re not dating but their body language tells another story – see the pics – The Mirror
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 12th, March 2010 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comment
In Pictures: Frank Lampard Inspires Christine Bleakley To ‘Jetski’ Across Channel For Sports Relief
BBC TeeVee’s Christine Bleakley has waterskied from Britain to France. She went 22 miles across The English Channel in one hour 40 minutes. She fell 8 times.
The Daily Mail speaks for all news media when it says:
Joy: Christine Bleakley punches the air after making it across The English Channel in just one hour 40 minutes this morning on a jetski
Waterski. Jetski. Whatever. What we want to know is did dating Frank Lampard keep you going? Well, Christine, did it?
“It was really tough though the water was freezing and having to get up after every fall was exhausting.”
Yadda-yadda-yadda. And Frank. You were thinking of Frank all the time?
“Thank you so much to everyone who has supported me along the way, it really kept me going out there.”
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 12th, March 2010 | In: Celebrities | Comment
Pink Floyd Don’t Want Any New Fans And May Refuse Royalties
PINK Floyd has decided not to woo any news fans to their music by winning a High Court ruling preventing EMI from selling individual tracks on the web.
Thanks to the ruling, new internet-savy fans won’t be able to hear only the best bits but will need to download the entire album and fast forward to the best bits.
Pink Floyd say single downloads compromise the artistic integrity of their works. To paraphrase the band, how can you enjoy the best bits if you don’t eat your meat?
Look out for Pink Floyd handing back all royalties earned from single sales and airplay… Or not.
1972618
Posted: 12th, March 2010 | In: Celebrities | Comment (1)
Amber Rose Is the Heather Mills Sex Bot: Photo Gallery Evidence
NIGHT time in Hollywood, California, and brattish popstar Kanye West’s robot lover Amber Rose is out and about. She looks so life-like. But sex robots can be so. But on whom has she been modelled? We looked. We watched. And then it came to us. This isn’t Amber Rose. This is the Heather Mills sexbot. If so, a question, readers: were any Beatles hurt during its making? We should be told…
Posted: 12th, March 2010 | In: Celebrities | Comment
American Idol Final 12 Party: In Pictures
AMERICAN Idol is down to the last 12: Tim Urban, Crystal Bowersox, Aaron Kelly, Michael Lynche, Paige Miles, Casey James, Katie Stevens, Didi Benami, Siobhan Magnus, Lee Dewyze, Lacey Brown and Andrew Garcia. Our man in LA went to see the party. And to see if Lacey Brown does look like a younger version of Sharon Osbourne in the flesh – albeit with less taught face skin…
8501354
Posted: 12th, March 2010 | In: Celebrities | Comment
Corey Haim Did Not Die From Drugs Overdose: Pictures
CONTRARY to what everybody else has been reporting, 38-year-old actor Corey Haim did not die of a drug overdose, writes Anorak’s Man in LA.
Haim’s mother tells the press she got a “courtesy call” from the LA County Cornor’s office, informing her that her son had an enlarged haeart, and fluid on the lungs. Therefore, the cause of death will be listed as pulmonary congestion.
Posted: 12th, March 2010 | In: Celebrities | Comment
Boyzone Remember Stephen Gately And Ronan Keating’s Hair: In Pictures
TO the Boyzone concert at the royal Albert Hall, they came to remember Stephen Gately – a career in pictures. Rumours of the death of Ronan Keating’s hair seem premature. Recently, Keating has been wearing a version of Donald’s Trump’s hair tsunami (TM), albeit with the wave gelled down. But at the concert the hair was fluffy and doing an impression of TinTin rowing in a light breeze. Also on stage was pro-celebrity ice dancer Mikey Graham, Coronation Street actor Keith Duffy and mobile adult education reading room Shane Lynch. We swooned. And took photos:
8501021
Posted: 12th, March 2010 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comment
Cheryl Cole’s ‘Sick’ Revenge Shag And ‘Laid Up’ Waiting for Ashley
CHERYL COLE is “SICK”. This is good news for the nation’s men who are hoping for Cheryl’s revenge shag on Ashley Cole. Most would have just settled for squiring the “nation’s sweetheart” but if she wants to be sick, that’s her prerogative.
Reading on in the Star we learn that the revenge shag might have to wait because Cheryl “has been hit by bronchitis” and will not be appearing on the Jonathan Ross show.
This was the show, also featuring Charlotte Church, which led to the headline:
Cheryl Cole and Charlotte Church’s feud is set to reignite when they appear on Friday Night with Jonathan Ross this Friday.
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 12th, March 2010 | In: Celebrities | Comment
Mark Owen’s Women: White Whine, A Blow-Up Bed And Pictures
MARK Owen, the Take That fallen possum, says he shagged 10 women while dating his wife-to-be Emma. He was seeing Neva Hanley for around five years – right up until his wedding. So he says.
He appeals for privacy, via that most public forums: Twitter:
“I’d like to ask the media to respect the privacy of my wife and children at this difficult time. No further comment will be made.”
And today the Sun screams:
“STAR’S CONFESSION: DAY 2 – TAKE THAT MARK: MY BOOZE REHAB HELL.”
Owen says he has “secretly battled a drink problem for at least TEN YEARS”.
Mark Owen And The Wome – pictures
Ten is a big number to Mark Owen. He can’t remember exactly how many other women’s he’s shagged but it’s “maybe ten”.
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 12th, March 2010 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comment (1)
James Brown’s Body Is Missing: In Pictures
WHOA! James Brown’s body is no longer mouldering in his grave according to one of his daughters.
The soul singer who died on Christmas Day 2006 , was in a crypt at his daughter Deanna’s South Carolina home while the family looks for a more fitting open to his public mausoleum
LaRhonda Pettit, his 48-year-old illegitimate daughter, claims he has been spirited off somewhere to stop her discovering his true cause of death..
James was 73 when a heart attack stopped the music.
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 12th, March 2010 | In: Celebrities | Comment
American Idol Plans To Kill Keith Richards By Unconventional Weapons
ROLLING Stone Keith Richards famously cannot be killed by conventional weapons. But American Idol singers murdering his music might just do it:
Entertainment Weekly reports:
EW has learned that American Idol’s Top 12 contestants will perform the music of the Rolling Stones next week. During an ad break at the top 8 guys performance show, Ryan Seacrest taped a radio promotion in which he mentioned that the first week for the 12 Idol finalists will feature songs by the iconic British rock group.
Ladies and gentlemen we give you the death of Keith Richards…
Posted: 11th, March 2010 | In: Celebrities | Comments (2)
Abnormal Miley Cyrus Rivals Jennifer Aniston’s Quote Of The Year
MILEY Cyrus is not like you. She is like Jennifer Ansiton, who told us that she had to go on holiday to Mexico with Gerard Butler because:
“These people survive on us coming down and spending money and coming here to these beautiful places. It sort of made sense to sort of say ‘Hey, let’s help out Mexico.’”
Anyhow, here’s Miley Curus growing into pretty much what you thoght she’d be:
While filming The Last Song on Georgia’s Tybee Island last year, Miley Cyrus couldn’t help but fall for her costar Liam Hemsworth. (On the Oscars red carpet Sunday, Cyrus, 17, confirmed that she and Hemsworth, 19, are dating and that “maybe” she’s in love)…
“Working with Miley was a alot easier than I thought it was going to be,” Hemsworth admits to the magazine. “From the first time we [met], It was like I had known her before.”
His famous girlfriend adds, “I think we’re both deeper than normal people–what they think and how they feel.”
It’s you normal people that help Miley be the abnormal person she is today…
Posted: 11th, March 2010 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comment (1)
Sarah Jesscia Parker Presents The Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills: In Pictures
SARAH Jessica Parker, Matthew McConaughey and the unreal Real housewives of New York were at Bravo’s 2010 Upfront Party at Skylight Studio in New York City. To give you an idea of the kind of telly Bravo broadcasts, know that it’s considering a show called Room Service, a one-hour comedy/drama hybrid about a smart hotel that runs a male escort service on the side.
Also following the Real Housewives of Atlanta, New York, Orange County and New Jersey, look out for The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. The show is getting progressively less real. Next up is the Real Housewives of A Teenage Adolescent’s Imagination, in which all the mums with made-up names have ever more gigantic bosoms, massive hair and slutty expressions and end every episode by exploding.
Also to be shown: Miami Social Club, Million Dollar Decorators and Pregnant in Heels.
8497156
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 11th, March 2010 | In: Celebrities | Comment
Take That’s Mark Owen Admits Shagging 10 Women: Neva Hanley In Pictures
DID you know that Take That singer Mark Owen – the one who looks like the Olsen sisters’ little bother – has had 10 affairs? Yeah, John Terry, Owen, that little streak of nothing who looks he lives in a tree on a eucalyptus plantation has pulled 10 women. How many did you manage, JT?
Pathetic. And you had the nerve to bill yourself as the captain of England. Shame. On. You.
Pictures: Mark Owen And The Women
Owen is “a serial love cheat”.
Mark, 38, broke the news of his cheating to Emma, mum of their two kids, at their London home yesterday. He said: “She loves me and I let her down. I’m really sorry.”
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 11th, March 2010 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comments (10)
Amanda Holden ‘Catches’ Jade Goody’s High-Profile Cancer
JADE Goody Day, formerly Mothers’ Day, approaches, and Amanda Holden wants us all to know that she “feared she’d ‘die like Jade Goody’”
What, loved by millions and lamented in a televised funeral? Don’t worry, Amanda. It’s very unlikely. But cancer is no joke and we turn to hear Holden’s tale of woe:
Britain’s Got Talent judge Amanda Holden yesterday said she feared she might die after a cancer scare. The actress, 39, was rushed to hospital when a doctor on the set of her ITV show Fantasy Lives found a lump in November.
Shells been a midwife, a singer and a self-aggrandising pain in the arse. Now she’s Jade Goody.
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 11th, March 2010 | In: Celebrities | Comment
Gary Busey’s Red Carpet CIA Horror Video
I
T’S Hollywood actor Gary Busey on the red capret. The teeth. The eye. The fringe. The gurn. The teeth. Gawd! The teeth!!! Our interviewer takes a step back. And then things get interesting…
As our pal 14 puts it:
Whenever Gary Busey shows up to an event or agrees to an interview, you can expect an erratic tempest of nonsensical utterances, unsettling glares, unpredictable outbursts followed by bear hugs and then more unpredictable outbursts, and best of all, the spewing forth of didactic gibberish through a mouthful of clattering teeth.
Posted: 11th, March 2010 | In: Celebrities | Comment (1)
Farrah Fawcett More Controversial In Death Than Life As Charlie’s Angels Fight Heats Up
WELL, Farrah Fawcett is certainly more controversial in death than she was in life. Amid the hubbub over the Academy Awards’ boneheaded decision to omit the beloved actress from its In Memorium segment Sunday night pipes up Farrah friend Alana Stewart to refute Kate Jackson’s claim that she (Stewart) and Ryan O’Neal stopped Kate from visiting Farrah in the final months of her life.
Alana, who is billed as “Farrah’s best friend,” accompanied Farrah to Germany for her ultimately unsuccessful cancer treatments and held the camera for the verite footage of her fight to beat the disease.
After Farrah sunk into the final stage of her illness, Stewart reportedly held up production of the NBC tabloid special based on her original film, demanding more money and a producer’s credit, then was the first to cash in with a quickie book about her best friend.
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 11th, March 2010 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comments (2)
Live From Studio Five: Shooting The Messenger And Boiling The Viewing
A ROW of sort has broken out between Ian Wright and Melinda Messengers, two clown-faced nodding heads on Live From Studio Five until Messenger walked away.
Wright said:
“Melinda would drown us out so many times and it was annoying. People don’t want to turn on to see people arguing.”
Messenger’s agent says:
“Melinda did not renew her contract because the working relationship with Ian Wright became intolerable.”
For those of you who’ve not seen the show, this is what Richard Woolfe, channel controller at Five, said when it launched:
“This is news – but not as you know it. It’s a chatty, forthright spirited magazine…Every other broadcaster’s schedule at this time is totally predictable and I believe there’s a huge opportunity for a show like this which will shake things up, put Five on the map and get viewers talking about the channel.”
And then it started. And we realised it wasn’t a telly show but part of the Government plan to get people off prescription drugs. Here was the answer: sit the masses in front of Wright, Messenger and Kate Walsh and watch as they reach a vegetative state. The ambition was to make the viewers into “cabbages” but the show has exceeded all expectation and we can revels that nine out of ten viewers made it to “boiled cabbages”.
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 11th, March 2010 | In: Celebrities | Comment
Jennifer Aniston Shines For Gerard Butler In London: Pictures
JENNIFER Aniston has new film out, The Bounty Hunter, and has arrived in the UK to promote it. This being Aniston, the tabloid rules state she must be embroiled in a love story.
The impression is augments hy her being glowing on the cover of W magazine. Aniston is sat on Gerard Butler’s lap. That is Butler and not some animatronic version of the Scots actor. Aniston looks like she’s been weeping at her dead puppy’s grave. Butler looks like an extra from a shoot-em-up video game.
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 11th, March 2010 | In: Celebrities | Comment
Travis Barker And DJ A-Trak AT The Roxy: In Pictures
TO Travis Barker and DJ A-Trak’s debut live performance at the Roxy Theater in West Hollywood. Not since Sylvester Stallone met his mum at a narcolepsy conference have we seen so many dropping eyelids. Maybe they’re trying to read their necks? Also there, Kid Sister, Skinhead Rob, a man who can read in bed by his glower, and DJ Marshall Barnes…
8495764
Posted: 10th, March 2010 | In: Celebrities | Comment
RIP Corey Haim: A Life In Pictures
RIP Corey Haim RIP. Dead at just 38. You were a one of The Lost Boys. Now you are fodder for a voracious media. But then the beast has been fed:
“Haim died at 3:30 a.m. Wednesday of an apparent accidental overdose. His mother was at the home at the time.”
Haim once dated Victoria Beckham. Says she:
“We didn’t have sex or anything. In actual fact, he didn’t seem to want to try.”
Funny that:
Posted: 10th, March 2010 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comment
Jesus Luz Talks About The Univese Called Madonna: Interview
JESUS Luz is not only Madonna’s personal Jesus he is also a man with a mind. Get this of when he and Madonna met:
“I believe in the force of attraction. It was two energies that met, two minds that connected.”
One mind was his; the other’s hers.
“With all this attention, it is a real temptation to feel superior. So, for me, it’s really good that my friends says, ‘You are still a cool guy.”
You want more from the man who remains “very down to earth” despite dating Madonna and being named Jesus? Well, there is more, because Grazia is talking with the model and DJ.
Madonna And Jesus Luz Create A Baby Quicker Than Malawi: Very NSFW
“I always liked being a relationship. It’s difficult to meet a young girl who has a mature head.”
So he’s dating a mature girl with a young head – a work in progress.
But what of that modelling? Jesus says that when he met Madonna on a shoot for W magazine he knew he’d made it. It was his first shoot for a “renowned” magazine. A door had opened.
“I just did what I had to do. I was more thinking, ‘What can I do to get the next job.”
Then he started dating Madonna and “his modelling career is thriving”.
“A DJ for less than a year, he is already playing some of Brazil’s biggest clubs.”
Says Jesus:
“Many times I have asked God why he has given me so much. But I think that’s what happens in anyone’s life when the universe conspires to make it happen.”
It’s good when the universe is on your side. That’s the universe called Madonna…
Madonna And Jesus Luz Create A Baby Quicker Than Malawi: Very NSFW
Posted: 10th, March 2010 | In: Celebrities | Comments (4)
