Katie Price Creates The Jordanettes Tribute Act

PETER Andre employs Can Associates PR. Chantelle Houghton employs Can Associates PR. Peter Andre used to be deeply in love with Katie Price, who is no longer represented by Can Associates.

Chantelle Houghton is a bit part Katie Price – literally. If you want to get on, attach yourself to Jordan. Andre and Houghton are the Jordanettes, a Katie Price tribute act.

Anorak

Posted: 6th, July 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comment (1)

Jordy Chandler Killed Michael Jackson In 1993

Jordy Chandler Killed Michael Jackson In 1993.

SHOCKS aplenty that Michael Jackson not only lived to reach 50 and never collapsed into his every growing chin dimple, but that he should survive heinous charges levelled against him that were never proven and continue to dog tributes to his achievements.

Do we remember the Jackson of song and dance, or the older Jackson, the walking hall of mirrors that presented impersonators with a moving target and tabloids with an easy one?

Jordy Chandler

Still no word from Jordy Chandler, the boy who told police that Jackson was a sexual predator, and whose claims were left unchallenged in court when Jackson’s gave him $25 million to go away, a move that did Jackson no favours.

Anorak

Posted: 6th, July 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comments (5)

TMZ’s Beyond Twisted Executive Producer Axed

ANORAK’S Man in LA looks at how TMZ’s new show Beyond Twisted has lost its exective producer Lisa Hudson before its even aired:

In Hollywood, losing the person in charge of a show before the show even
premieres is not a good indicator of success in the ratings race.

And that’s what’s happened over at TMZ, as the staffers get set to spin-off
a clips-based TV show called “Beyond Twisted.”

The Rat Pack is hearing that Executive Producer Lisa Hudson has been
hacked from the show’s personnel roster… ON THE VERY DAY WHEN THE
SHOW WAS SUPPOSED TO PREMIERE.

Anorak

Posted: 6th, July 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comment

Big Brother’s Sophie Reade Is Going Bald

BIG Brother was Michael Jackson’s favourite show. Well so he told us. But, then the story goes that Jackson was off his faces on drugs and his second favourite show was Lovejoy.

And the links between Jackson and Big Brother just keep on coming. Not only are both entertainment forms dead, but the house’s resident cosmetic surgery enthusiast Sophie Reade is going bald. Like Michael Jackson:

Says (I’m) Noirin Kelly: “You’re pulling out your hair extensions and the hair’s coming with it! You’re gonna go bald. You’re balding.”
Lisa: “You’re scalp’s terrible.”
Noirin: “You’ve still got a pretty face – that’s all that matters.”

And Anorak wonders. The blonde hair. The fair skin. The hairlessness? The sexless sexual indiscretions?It’s uncanny.

Can it be that Sophie Reade is Jackson’s child?

Add it to the lit of talking points that will follows Jackson’s burial and keep alive the man who will continues to live on in the tabloids long after his burial…

Anorak

Posted: 6th, July 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comment

Michael Jackson Stars In New Harry Potter Film

GREAT news that Rupert Grint has recovered from his bout of Celebrity Swine Flu just in time to tread the soggy carpet at the London premiere of Harry Potter And The Half–Blood Prince.

What are the odds?

Says his publicist and medical expert:

“He has now fully recovered and is looking forward to joining his fellow cast mates for the junket and premiere this week, and then will return to filming afterwards.”

Anorak

Posted: 6th, July 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comment

Michael Jackson’s Secret Gay Lover Unmasked

BEFORE we get to the news that Michael Jackson was having it off with the nanny –yeah, her – the Sun has a question for the Little Jackson Three:

Was your Daddy a druggie?

And while you consider that, kids, know:

‘Jacko’s ghost at Neverland’

Roll up to see it. As the Sun comforts the Jackson Three, we enjoy news that dad was romancing the nanny.

Anorak

Posted: 6th, July 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comments (7)

Michael Jackson Funeral Schedule And Concert Details

MICHAEL Jackson Watch: Win a ticket for Michael Jackson’s funeral; Jackson was killed by his debts; and funeral schedule in full…

The Sun: “TOUTRAGE – Fury as ticket lotto winner fleece the fans”

It’s “TOUT OF ORDER”

Anorak agrees – anyone who secured a ticket to the big Jackson sing off should be made to attend. It’s what Jackson would have wanted.

One seller out to make a killing crowed he bagged FIVE for the glitzy 10am memorial show in Los Angeles, which will follow the 8am private family funeral.

Jackson Five? What are the odds?

Metro: “Jackson memorial – the Lucky 8,750 fans are chosen”

The chosen few.

Daily Star: “JACKO FUNERAL: RIOT COPTS ON ALERT”

Anorak

Posted: 6th, July 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comments (5)

Alana Stewart’s Is First With A Book On Farrah Fawcett

FARRAH Fawcett is dead and buried. And Anorak’s Man in LA sports Alana Stewart’s new book about her friend Farrah Fawcett:

Who will be the first to cash in on the death of Farrah Fawcett? Less than a week after the brave icon’s funeral, her close friend Alana Stewart is first out of the gate and well ahead of the pack with a book based on the Farrah’s cancer journey journal that was supposed to be the basis for her cancer documentary.

“My Journey with Farrah: What I’ve Learned about Life, Love, and Friendship” has shown up on Amazon.com with a healthy discount off its hardcover list price of $23.99.

Anorak

Posted: 5th, July 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comment (1)

Katie Holmes Issues Crew With Scientology Confidentiality Agreement

KATIE  Holmes is so sensitive to comments and questions on Scientology that she has, reportedly, asked crew members on her new film not to mention it:

One film source from the set said that each crew member had signed agreements saying they would not ask the superstar about her religion, Scientology. The couple, who have braved chilly weather to explore the city and have happily chatted to locals, are notoriously private when it comes to questions or discussions about their religion.

Notoriously private. Cue the video:

Anorak

Posted: 5th, July 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comments (3)

Michael Jackson’s Nose Is Missing

MICHAEL Jackson Watch: Jackson “molested at least ten boys”, will be buried without his brain, and rumours that his nose is missing.

NOTW: Michael Jackson locked boys in his bedroom and fed wine from babies’ bottles

MICHAEL Jackson’s former housekeeper today reveals how the star would lock boys in his bedroom for days, plying them with booze before sexually abusing them.

Adrian McManus also told the News of the World he even issued veiled DEATH THREATS to his staff to STOP them telling cops about it.

Adrian McManus..? Oh her:

Under cross-examination she said she had lied in a 1993 court deposition when she reported she had not seen any inappropriate behaviour by Mr Jackson at Neverland. She claimed Mr Jackson threatened to report her to her superiors.

Defence lawyer Thomas Mesereau pointed out Ms McManus was part of the lawsuit filed against Mr Jackson for unlawful dismissal, which was thrown out for being fraudulent and malicious.

Anorak

Posted: 5th, July 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comments (6)

First Picture Of Michael Jackson In His Coffin

OK! magazine paid $500,000 for a picture of Michael Jackson dying – a picture captioned – get this – “IN LOVING MEMORY“. Now Anorak brings you a  picture of Jackson in a coffin.

Enjoy:

Michael Jackson Memorial Tattoos: Gallery
Staff Thought Michael Jackson Playing Dead As He Lay Dying
The Ten Best Michael Jackson Conspiracy Theories
Michael Jackson Dies Without His Nose On
Michael Jackson Wanted Muslim Burial
The Real Story Of How Michael Jackson Died
Michael Jackson Puts His Kids In Child Abuse Horror Story
TMZ Guessed That Michael Jackson Had Died
Michael Jackson Death T-Shirts For Sale
Paparazzi Compare Michael Jackson’s Death To Winning FA Cup Final
Exclusive: Michael Jackson Unreleased Album With Tupac Shakur

Anorak

Posted: 5th, July 2009 | In: Celebrities, Photojournalism | Comments (8)

Harry Potter Star Has Swine Flu

IN today’s edition of Celebrity Bingo – can you link a celebrity to a big news story? – Sky News reports that Harry Potter actor Rupert Grint has swine flu.

The thespian, known to millions of adults as Ron Weasley has, as his publicist terms it: “a mild bout of swine flu.”

Anorak

Posted: 5th, July 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comment

Farrah Fawcett’s Ryan O’Neal Seen With Another Woman

FARRAH Fawcett is not long dead and her long-term lover Ryan O’Neal is grieving. Perfect time, then, for the Daily Mail to release the news that he has been spotted with another woman:

The Hollywood star strolled barefoot through the surf on a Californian beach with his arm over the shoulder of the unnamed woman.

Anorak

Posted: 4th, July 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comment

Michael Jackson’s Pet Bubbles For Sale

MICHAEL Jackson’s old mucker Bubbles is for sale.

Says Bubbles:

“I hope Diana Ross kicks a bucket better than she kicks a football. I never liked her.”

Spotter: M Kritharis

MICHAEL JACKSON Michael’s Pets (Original official 1987 US licenced ‘Bubbles The Chimp’ plush toy featuring Bubbles wearing a cap, shirt, tie and jacket. This toy comes complete with the original story and song cassette and still attached to the original picture card packing).

Read the rest of this entry »

Anorak

Posted: 3rd, July 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comments (7)

Mariah Carey Copies Michelle Obama’s Fashion

MARIAH Carey has a huge left hand, attached to a gigantic left thumb.

Celebrity thumbs are all the rage, a trend begun by Michelle Obama and adopted by Megan Fox, and now Mariah Carey.

The thumb is seen dangling from the end of one of Carey’s asymetric arms on the cover of Obsessed.

Anorak

Posted: 3rd, July 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comment

Megan Fox Stars In Noboru Iguchi’s RoboGeisha 2

WHAT next for Megan Fox? How do you follow an part in a non-acting film like Transformers? With a part in Tranformers 2. Certainly. And then with a part in a sequel to Noboru Iguchi’s RoboGeisha:

Megan Fox Trashes Whites And Christians

Megan Fox’s Secret Picture Gallery

Anorak

Posted: 3rd, July 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comment

Megan Fox Makes Michael Bay Look Young And Dumb

MEGAN Fox opens her mouth and to prove they are not staring at her cleavage, hacks takes down every word she says.

Editors print it because what Megan Fox says can be illustrated with a picture of her skin.

Now, Megan Fox says her Transformers’ director Michael Bay created a film “not about acting”.

Says Bay:

“Well, that’s Megan Fox for you. She says some very ridiculous things because she’s 23 years old and she still has a lot of growing to do…”

Bay is 44 years young. Says he:

“Nick Cage wasn’t a big actor when I cast him, nor was Ben Affleck before I put him in Armageddon. Shia LaBeouf wasn’t a big movie star before he did Transformers — and then he exploded. Not to mention Will Smith and Martin Lawrence, from Bad Boys.”

Really?

Anorak

Posted: 3rd, July 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comment

Inside Michael Jackson’s New Neverland Theme Park

MICHAEL Jackson’s Neverland Ranch is to be turned into a theme park. The old rides are gone and the news rides are being installed. Anorak brings you an exclusive look inside:

The Ten Best Things To See And Do at the Neverland Theme Park

Nemesis – Face your Nemesis. This intense ride takes you through shopping malls as an animatronic Martin Bashir asks you questions. Will you break it – or will it break you?

The Hit Parade – Walk down Main Street USA and listen as the people scream “Paedo!” and “Weirdo!” As you walk, yellow squares in the road light up. Tread on the wrong squares and fall into the Gary Glitter Bargain Bucket. Tread on the right squares and the world dances with you.

Oblivion – Face your fears. You know you shouldn’t look down, but you won’t be able to stop yourself taking a peek at the colossal vertical drop from the highs of Thriller to the lows of the Brit Awards.

Hall of Wax – Wander though the Hall of Wax and experience Michael Jackson in his many guises. The tour ends in the Hot Wax Surgery where you can buy supple balls of molten wax and make your own Wacko Jacko.

Leave Me Alone! – Something for mum and dad. Sit junior on Jackson’s knee and try to win big cash prizes. Sit the child wrongly and junior comes away with only a cherished memory. Sit him or her on the ‘Thriller’, and – Kapow! – money pours from Jackson’s orifices like sweat off a doctor’s brow.

On The Wall – Have your face digitally entered into that famous picture of Jackson at Liza Minelli’s wedding to David Gest. Hang it over a radiator or open fire and have everyone think you’re melting.

It’s A Small World After All – Take a DNA test and see if you are Michael Jackson’s child. Since Jackson died we are now each of us no more than Five Degrees Separated from Michael Jackson. Fact.

I’m Forever Blowing Bubbles – Sing-a-long with a millions Jackson look-alikes – one may even be him!

I’m forever blowing bubbles,

Pretty bubbles in the air.

They fly so high,

Nearly reach the sky,

Then like my dreams,

They fade and die.

Fortune’s always hiding,

I’ve looked everywhere,

I’m forever blowing bubbles,

Pretty bubbles in the air.

Jesus Juice Bar – Take holy communion over an injection of Jesus Juice in the Jesus Juice Bar.

Where’s Jacko? – As you wonder about Neverland look out for Michael Jackson. Jackson can appear as a small boy, a confused teen, a man-child or even a 20-year-dead  masked mummy lying in a four-poster bed propped up on back issues of Melody Maker.

Michael Jackson Funeral Guest List: Pictures
Michael Jackson’s Last Will In Full
Michael Jackson’s Secret Lover Revealed
Michael Jackson Presents More World’s Best Misspelled Tattoos
Michael Jackson: CNN Raises Questions About Bubbles’ Parentage
Elton John Outsells Michael Jackson
Michael Jackson’s Nurse Denies Stomach Pump Claims

Anorak

Posted: 3rd, July 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comment (1)

Michael Jackson Has Car Repossessed

THE death of Michael Jackson affects us in different ways. Some become suicidal; some commit crime; some lash out; some conspire; and some cash in.

In this video, Michael Jackson has his car repossessed. He reacts with the power of dance…

Anorak

Posted: 3rd, July 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comment

The Best Michael Jackson Cover Versions

MICHAEL Jackson is dead. But the concert must go on. Bring on the Michael Jacksons and the impersonators. Cue the acts who did it their way. Anorak presents the Best Michael Jackson Cover Versions Ever – it being what he would have wanted:

Shine Head – Billie Jean

Anorak

Posted: 3rd, July 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comment (1)

Amy Winehouse Banned From Swimming

AMY Winehouse has been “banned” from swimming in the pool at the Caribbean resort where she currently resides.

Reasons as to why barefoot, reforming drug-addled, post-Blaaaaaaake Winehouse has been banned from dipping in the shared pool may not be immediately obvious.

So the Sun offers an explanation:

Bosses at the Cotton Bay complex in St Lucia were worried by Wino’s latest habit of going swimming after marathon boozing sessions. They feared she was going to drown so barred the singer from the pool for her own safety.

Anorak

Posted: 3rd, July 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comment

Danny Gans And Michael Jackson’s Iatrogenic Deaths

MICHAEL Jackson is dead. Las Vegas performer Danny Gans is dead.  Their deaths were iatrogenic – caused by medical treatment.

“The musical impressionist died at 53 after ingesting a powerful opiate he did not have a prescription for— “drug store heroin” that was given to him by an associate or pusher, or acquired by a doctor under an assumed name. Such illegal activities are currently being investigated by the Los Angeles Police Department in the apparent drug overdose death of superstar entertainer Michael Jackson. The LAPD has reportedly asked federal drug agents to help them find out who was feeding painkillers to 50-year-old Jacko.

Anorak

Posted: 3rd, July 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comments (2)

Michael Jackson Tried To Buy Octomum Nadya Suleman’s Children

MICHAEL Jackson Watch: Funeral tickets for sale, Jackson adopts Octomum’s kidz and Debbie Rowe floats her boat…

The Sun: R.I.P. OFF – Fans fury at plan to sell £15 tickets for Jacko funeral”
Or as it says elsewhere in the Sun:

Watch Jacko’s final show here

Live!

Daily Star: “JACKO IS BACKO”

Michael Jackson has left enough new songs for at least 30 new albums. One of the bosses at his record company revealed that the king of pop left “a mountain of dozens and dozens” of unreleased recordings in the vaults.

Anorak

Posted: 3rd, July 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comment (1)

Michael Jackson Bought Drugs As Jack London, Omar Arnold, Barack Obama And Pete Doherty

MICHAEL Jackson Watch: TMZ reports that Michael Jackson “frequently used the names Omar Arnold and Jack London to get powerful drugs, including Demerol”.

Anorak hears rumours that Jackson also used the names Neda Soltan, Neda Soltani, Madeleine McCann, Manchester United, Cristiano Ronaldo (that enough?), Secret Sex Video, Angelina Jolie Naked (the SEO says keep going), Brad Pitt, Barack Obama and Prince Harry Windsor. (Enough, this isn’t the Liverpool Post, The Guardian or Habitat.)

Anorak

Posted: 2nd, July 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comment

The Death Of Michael Jackson Will Be Televised

MICHAEL Jackson Watch: Debbie Rowe will prove her parentage and the death of Michael Jackson will be televised:

Says Debbie Rowe – but which one? Why, it’s the ex-wife of Michael Jackson. But which one? Last one to the theme park’s a bad look alike:

“I want my children.”

Anorak

Posted: 2nd, July 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comment