Celebrities Category
Celebrity news & gossip from the world’s showbiz and glamour magazines (OK!, Hello, National Enquirer and more). We read them so you don’t have to, picking the best bits from the showbiz world’s maw and spitting it back at them. Expect lots of sarcasm.
Jade Goody Statue To Be Made Of Wax
JADE Goody is a “Dummy” says the Daily Star.
Jade is to be immortalised as a waxwork at London’s Madame Tussauds. After the Jade Candle, we bring your Jade life-size candle, to keep the flame alive – forever.
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Posted: 9th, April 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comment
Billy Bob Thornton Presents The Most Awkward Celebrity Interviews Ever
ANORAK brings you the Most AWakwards celebroty interviews ever.
In 1963, the Irish writer Desmond Leslie – enraged by a nasty review of his wife’s latest play – was able to infiltrate the audience of David Frost’s studio discussion show, march up to offending reviewer Bernard Levin and land a superb left hook on his nose in front of 11 million viewers.
“Just a minute Mr Levin, this will only take a minute,” Leslie had said with impeccable politeness before unleashing a blow described by The Times as “the most public punch since Sonny Liston took the heavyweight title from Floyd Patterson”.
Billy Bob said he was upset because Ghomeshi referred to his acting career in the introduction to the interview. He said he’d told the producer to focus on the band and not mention his acting.
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Posted: 9th, April 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comment (1)
Suri Cruise On One Million Dollar Training Programme
SURI Cruise. Obey me. And for all you French and Spanish readers: Obey Me.
Early days in the education of Suri Cruise, but reports are that she will be able to say “Obey ME” in many languages when Tom’s $1 million investment in her education takes hold.
A “source” tells the National Enquirer:
“It doesn’t matter what Suri is doing, Tom wants her to be able to do it better than any other child. All parents think their kids are special, but Tom and Katie firmly believe Suri is gifted.”
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Posted: 8th, April 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comment
Fat, Unemployed X Factor Loser Bullied
MEET X Factor wannabe Emma Chawner, the X Factor singer who “claimed that her obesity discouraged employers from hiring her”.
Emma is on a live phone-in on Victoria Derbyshire’s BBC Radio Five Live show. A Daniel O’Donnell rings in and offers Chawner a job as a security guard. But no thanks – she “didn’t want to stand on a door watching people go in”.
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Posted: 8th, April 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comments (4)
Danielle Lloyd’s New Tattoo Glows In The Dark
DANIELLE Lloyd has filled time between footballers by getting a tattoo. You can now read Danielle as she perches on the end of your coffee table. The tattoo says:
Quis attero mihi tantum planto mihi validus
Want to know that it means?
To diminish me will only make me stronger.
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Posted: 8th, April 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comments (3)
Harry Potter Actor Arrested For Drugs
HARRY Potter actor Jamie Waylett, aka Hogwarts pupil Vincent Crabbe, has been arrested after police allegedly found cannabis worth £2,000 in his bedroom.
Waylett caught the eye of London’s Celebrity Police Service suspicion when he was driving about the city in a “car”.
To his home in Camden North London, and failing to spot Amy Winehouse or even Peter Doherty, the CPS make do with nicking Waylett and confiscating, as is alleged, ten mature cannabis plants valued at around £2,000.
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Posted: 8th, April 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comments (4)
Seeking Men On Octomum’s TV Dating Show
PSST! Wanna data a mum of 14? Whoah! One at a time. Ok – forget it. There’s room for everyone in Octomum’s clown car gang bang.
Nadya Suleman’s romantic life is to be filmed for a reality show. In it, viewers will see Octomum try out a number of syringes – some long, some short, some green, some red, some slightly bent at the tip.
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Posted: 8th, April 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comments (2)
Jade Goody To Appear In Big Brother 10
IT’S not been hard enough covering Jade Goody‘s post-reality career. But now the Star has news to thrill even the most jaded Goody watcher – Jade is to make a return to Big Brother.
TV medium Derek Acorah will not be channelling Jade. Oh no. Jade will be there in person. The Daily Star says so.
Daily Star: “Jade’s back in BB”
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Posted: 8th, April 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comments (3)
Jade Goody Eats Out
JADE Goody: Anorak’s at-a-glance look at Jade Goody’s post-reality career, with grave robbers, Jade TV and awards…
The Mirror: “My lunch at Jade’s Grave”
Jade’s grave doubles as a picnic table. (Max Call me – I’ve ideas.) Jackiey Budden told onlookers [the snappers]: “I’m just having lunch with Jade” as she spent an hour reading the Bible and eating crisps and Scotch eggs.
The official Jade Goody Scotch Egg, made in Scotchland.
Jackiey, 51, had walked a mile from Jade’s former home to the churchyard that overlooks rolling countryside in Upshire, Essex.
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Posted: 8th, April 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comments (2)
Gary Coleman Hates Whites
GARY Coleman is “not a violent person”, he just hates white people. What you talking about, Gary?
He’s on a film called Midgets v Mascots. He needs the money:
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Posted: 7th, April 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comments (2)
Chloe Madeley’s Naked Breasts
CHLOE Madeley has tried on the lad’s mag knickers and drugs, and now flashes a side order of breast as she meets her mum and dad in a TV presenting capacity on the red carpet.
The Mail sees hints of mum Judy Finnigan as Chloe M-A-D-E-L-E-Y presents the Galaxy British Book Awards to one of the country’s leading book awards TV stations.
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Posted: 7th, April 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comment
Farrah Fawcett Salutes Jade Goody
BEEP! BEEP! Anorak’s CCN (Celebrity Cancer News) alerts us to Farah Fawcett’s anal cancer. Like JADE Goody…
Daily Mirror: “Like Jade Goody, Farrah decided to share her private battle by making a documentary, A Wing and a Prayer. It is likely to be her last appearance on camera.”
Examiner: “Unlike the late Jade Goody, a woman who chose to live the end of her life on a public stage, Fawcett has dealt with her illness pretty much out of the limelight.”
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Posted: 7th, April 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comments (8)
Jade Goody’s Grave Robbers
JADE Goody: Anorak’s at-a-glance look at Jade Goody’s post-reality career, with grave robbers, Jade TV and awards…
Daily Star: “GRAVE ROBBERS TARGET JADE”
It’s what she would have wanted, right?
Ten Famous Shoplifters, With Jade Goody And Steven Gerrard
JADE Goody’s final resting place is being lined up as a target by robbers, her family believe.
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Posted: 7th, April 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comments (9)
Poor Suri Cruise Undressed
PITY “poor Suri Cruise”, the “fashion victim”. The Mail tells its readers:
How poor Suri Cruise has become a style victim at just three years of age
Lydia Slater looks on, with pity:
Poor little Suri. Not for her the wonderful freedom of going out in electric pink and a plastic tiara (as any parent of a toddler will know, their own taste in clothes is resolutely chavvy), and God forbid she drips any ice-cream down her costly frocks.
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Posted: 6th, April 2009 | In: Celebrities, Photojournalism | Comments (4)
Jade Goody Was Assassinated
JADE Goody: Anorak’s at-a-glance look at Jade Goody’s post-reality career, with Maureen Lipman.
Russell Brand says Jade Goody was killed by the media. Mohamed Al Fayed has yet to seize on the Jade-Di theory and blame Pricne Philip for her death, but Maureen Lipman has an idea:
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Posted: 6th, April 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comments (2)
How To Get To Jade Goody’s Shrine
JADE Goody: Anorak’s at-a-glance look at Jade Goody’s post-reality career, with
Daily Star: “Jade’s secret shrine”
Old Mr Anorak would like readers to know that the shrine will not be dismantled after a suitable period of mourning – say, ten years – but in the Shrine Facility, alongside shrines to Our Maddy, Baby P, Princess Diana, Nike Baldwin, Cecil Rhodes and many more…
The Sun: “We don’t want her grave to be shrine”
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Posted: 6th, April 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comments (3)
Bobby And Freddy’s Last Words To Jade Goody
JADE Goody: Anorak’s at-a-glance look at Jade Goody’s post-reality career, with Jack’s words, specials and the boys speak…
Front Pages:
Daily Express: “Farewell Jade”
Ten page special!
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Posted: 5th, April 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comments (6)
Jade Goody Funeral Fashion Show
JADE Goody: Anorak’s at-a-glance look at Jade Goody’s post-reality career, with funeral fashions, souvenir issues and sniffs…
Daily Mail: Liz Jones is having an “I was there” moment…
Liz Joens is, of course, minder to The New Jade Goody.
“Jade’s funeral was a mecca of bling and chavdom… but also of hope and strength”
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Posted: 5th, April 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comments (7)
Jade Goody Funeral Pictures
JADE Goody funeral pictures -and flowers…
Posted: 4th, April 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comments (4)
Jade Goody Is Madonna Is Nietzsche
JADE Goody, Madonna and Nietzsche – the Financial Times finds a way to work celebrity news into its pages – again. Remember: “My last hope for a celebrity-free read”…
The 20th century saw, as he had predicted, the migration of values from the higher – the spiritual – to the lower – the material, accompanied by an orgy of violence unmatched in recorded history, as well as a weakening of the taboos surrounding sex. The justification, if justification were needed, was that material values were more real, less hypocritical. I don’t know if Madonna reads Nietzsche, but her “Material Girl” (“You know that we are living in a material world/ And I am a material girl”) was a perfect embodiment of this shift, as, in a starker way, was the short life and death of Jade Goody.
Jade is… well, whatever you want her to be (for a price)…
Posted: 4th, April 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comment
Perry Farrell Sings Oseh Shalom
PERRY “Peretz” Farrell, once of Jane’s Addiction is seen here singing on the Chabad Telethon, singing the classic “Oseh Shalom”.
As one voice on Boing Boing puts it:
What makes it even more bizarre is how comfortable and natural Perry Farrell looks singing in that context.
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Posted: 4th, April 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comment
Jade Goody’s Last Take Away
JADE Goody: Anorak’s at-a-glance look at Jade Goody’s post-reality career, with Kirsty Gallagher’s breasts, thighs and tum…
Daily Mirror: “Kirsty Gallacher: My boobs aren’t as pert and my bum isn’t as firm but I’m finally happy with my body”
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Posted: 4th, April 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comments (2)
Jade Goody’s Minging Funeral Flowers
JADE Goody: Anorak’s at-a-glance look at Jade Goody’s post-reality career, with Jade’s funeral, Jade’s flowers and Jade’s mum…
The Sun: “Crowd’s farewell to Jade”
WREATHS spelling out Jade Goody’s best-known sayings — including “Minging” and “East Angula” — will accompany the reality TV star on her final journey today.
Floral arrangements will also include the word “kebab” — from one of her infamous Big Brother moments — and a Marmite jar after she compared herself to the spread, saying: “You either love me or hate me.”
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Posted: 4th, April 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comments (13)
The Most Bizarre And Worst Celebrity Dolls Ever Made
BARBIE is 50 this year and Anorak brings you the 50 Things You Never Knew About Barbie. But Barbie is not the only celebrity doll. There have been others. And Anorak brings you the strangest, least-deserving, most bizarre and downright odd celebrity dolls ever – enjoy:
Karl Lagerfeld, Angelina Jolie, Ann Coulter, Bill Clinton, Bindi Irwin, Amy Winehouse, Britney Spears, Caylee Anthony, Charles Dickens, Diane Ross, Donald Trump, Drew Carey, Albert Einstein, Elton John,George Bush, Hillary Clinton, Hugh Hefner, Jennifer Lopez (NSFW), Jerry Springer, Jesus, John Travolta, Kelly Osbourne, Laura Bush, Lemme,Lindsay Lohan, Nirvana, The One, OJ, Pamela Anderson, Paris Hilton,Princess Diana, Rosie O’Donnell (Barbie!), Sarah Palin (schoolgirl), Nicolas Sarkozy voodoo, Seth Godin, Snoop Dogg, Suzanne Somers (with thighs!), Sonny, Steve Irwin, Timberlake and Jackson, Tom Cruise, Tori Spelling, Vanilla Ice, Victoria Silvstedt, William Shakepeare action figure, Winston Churchill.
Karl Lagerfeld’s Credit Crunch Survival Tips.
Posted: 3rd, April 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comment
Kerry Katona Vanishes
THE Sun reports that Kerry Katona has been in a “’lost day’ mystery”.
TROUBLED Kerry Katona sparked fresh fears for her health — by mysteriously vanishing for a day.
The Sun looked in the Daily Star, on MTV, poured over CCTV footage of the Tesco car park in Warrington, down the back of the sofa – and even checked in the squirrel section at Iceland – but Kerry was not in any of her usual haunts.
She left her home and four kids, turned off her mobile and failed to turn up for a photo-shoot and interview.
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Posted: 3rd, April 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comments (4)
