Celebrities Category
Celebrity news & gossip from the world’s showbiz and glamour magazines (OK!, Hello, National Enquirer and more). We read them so you don’t have to, picking the best bits from the showbiz world’s maw and spitting it back at them. Expect lots of sarcasm.
Music GIF: Beyonce pulled off stage in Brazil
TO Brazil, where a fan has pulled Beyonce off the stage. By, then…
Superstars and Superfans: Paul Burrell is now as Royal as Princess Diana
PAUL Burrell is plugging his TLC show Superstars and Superfans.
From the makers of Sky1’s Pineapple Dance Studios, Superstars and Superfans follows the lives of some of the UK’s most dedicated and obsessed celebrity fans, providing a glimpse into the eccentric world of these real-life celebrity devotees, while also delving deep into the lives of the celebrities over whom the superfans obsess. What happens when their worlds collide?
But:
This series we meet superfans including Jax who has an obsession with Shane Lynch from Boyzone and has an ‘Aladdin’s cave’ dedicated to all things Shane Lynch, she even has her very own personal fantasy world – “Lynch Land” where she meets Shane and plays out their would-be life together, Victoria whose obsession revolves around Westlife, she has created her very own Westlife ‘hall of fame’ in her hallway, dubbed the Westlife Passage with pictures of her favourite stars, and Theresa whose obsession with Rod Stewart has seen her attend over 150 of his concerts and keeps a momentum of each one in her ‘Rod Room.’
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Posted: 16th, September 2013 | In: Celebrities, Royal Family, TV & Radio | Comment
In the 1950s Amy Winehouse appeared on the album cover Billy Devroe’s Broad Minded?
IN the 1950s, Billy Devroe & The Devilaires sang and recorded bawdy songs. Albums were called suggestively An Assortment of Party Naughties, Censored, She Gives Food Stamps and Broad Minded.
Anorak has noticed that the female accompaniment on the cover of Broad Minded looks not a lot unlike the late and much missed star Amy Winehouse?
The face rings bell:
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Posted: 15th, September 2013 | In: Flashback, Music | Comment (1)
Terrible tag-lines: Patrick Swayze trails Next of Kin
TERRIBLE Tag lines:
In 1989 Patrick Swayze starred in Next of Kin. The trailer was punctuated with Swayze uttering the cracking tag-line:
“You haven’t seen bad yet, but it’s coming…”
…to a cinema near you…
Sarah Vine settles into her Daily Mail role by mocking women and taking about her kidzzzzzzzzzzzzz
SARAH Vine, aka Mrs Michael Gove, has a new column in the Daily Mail. Can she go on attack mode and bait those trolls? Having tried to turn the Times into a breast-free version of the women-hating Mail, can Vine get stuck into her new job?
Vine begins by wading in on Pippa Middleton, who has had the temerity to have lent her name to a book.
I grew up thinking that female writers were heroines to be admired. From Dorothy Parker to Jane Austen, they proved that a woman with a pen was the equal of any man. Now, as the book publishing industry sinks ever further into a quagmire entirely of its own making, it’s an opinion I am being forced to revise. For the women writers who seem to command most influence these days have about as much substance as a souffle. First, Pippa Middleton with her seemingly endless arsenal of idiotic tips and now Alexa ‘your-hair-looks-nice-if-you-wash-it’ Chung, model, TV presenter and professional thin-girl-about-town, whose new ‘book’, It, has seemingly got the fashion world all aflutter.
You won’t be surprised to hear that it consists chiefly of pictures of Chung in various states of undress, alongside really profound statements such as: ‘I used to get nail art done all the time, but I haven’t done for a while now.’
How on earth can I hope to convince my daughter of the merits of great writing when this is all it takes to score a hit?
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Posted: 13th, September 2013 | In: Celebrities | Comment
Salvador ‘Dalí is the biggest prick of the 20th Century’ says Henry Miller
HENRY Miller wrote this note back in 1973. In it he observed that Salvador Dalí (pictured below in 1936) ”the biggest ‘prick of the 20th century”.
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Posted: 12th, September 2013 | In: Books, Celebrities, Flashback | Comment
Behold the Stoddens! Doug Hutchison give Courtney a big set of balloons
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Posted: 12th, September 2013 | In: Celebrities, TV & Radio | Comment (1)
Hello I’m Johnny Cash – the 1976 Comic book and Jesus Christ reader
IN 1976 Spire Comics created “Hello, I’m Johnny Cash”. It’s his life with guitar, Jesus and lots of pills:
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Posted: 11th, September 2013 | In: Celebrities, Flashback | Comment
National Night in Singapore: Mentos mints release rap to promote procreation
THE results are not yet known. We do not know the take-up rate on the drive to make babies on National Day in Singapore this August 9 . The music to procreate by was supplied by Mentos Singapore and BBH Asia Pacific, the rap including such lyrics as:
“As a Singaporean citizen you’ll be doing your civic duty if you forget about the condoms after the fireworks and the parades are all over with. So let’s get fu**ing, shall we?”
“Let’s not watch fireworks, let’s make ‘em instead”
“Singapore’s population, it needs some increasin’ / So forget wavin’ flags, on August 9th we be freaking,”
“Exploring your body like the Night Safari / We gotta go all the way for Singapore”
“It’s National Night, so let’s make some fireworks ignite / It’s National Night, let’s make Singapore’s birthrate spike”
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The 1977 Sex Pistols Christmas Party and Huddersfield cake fight
ON Christmas Day 1977, the Sex Pistols were to Huddersfield for the Sex Pistols Christmas Party. All the cool children were at Ivanhoes to see the Postils play a benefit show for the families of striking firemen and miners. Johhny Rotten served cake to the children of striking miners who thew it back in his face.
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Posted: 11th, September 2013 | In: Flashback, Music | Comments (2)
Moaning: the secret of the great British pop song, as told by The Jam’s Paul Weller
WHAT’S the secret of a great British pop song? Daniel Rachel talks to The Jam’s Paul Weller and others:
“Down in the Tube Station at Midnight” revealed your sophistication and depth as a songwriter. Can you describe the evolution of that song and your changing ability to hone in on the small and the particular?
That started as a long prose-poem thing, like a short story in a way. It came from my insecurity and paranoia at being in London. I didn’t have any music for it. I was in two minds whether to do it. I was coaxed and talked into it by Vic Smith, our producer at the time. He was saying: “This is really good, you should try and set it to music.” The attention to the details is part of the person I am anyway, but it’s also bound up in the mod ethos which is predominantly all about attention to detail. We were talking about English songwriters: it’s picking up on the mundane, the everyday things and putting them, into a different setting, the very, very ordinary feelings, emotions or details that, once in song, you hear them in a different way. Without something too poncey or pretentious I was thinking about pop artists as well, where they took the everyday objects and made them into art. I don’t think it’s that dissimilar.
What was the appeal in chronicling the mundane?
It’s a very English thing, the way we all like to moan about the weather or we like a cup of tea or a particular f***ing biscuit and all that nonsense, but it’s us. It’s our identity, isn’t it?
Arctic Monkeys on X Factor and beer bellies
THE world of rock music is a dreary place at the moment and one of the few likeable bands on the circuit are Sheffield’s Arctic Monkeys. Whether you like their music or not, they seems to stand for something rather good. They’re defenders of the working classes without being boorish. They’ve always had half decent haircuts. They have fuzz pedals.
And in an interview on Newsnight, AM’s frontboy Alex Turner got onto pop music.
Turner defended the existence of X Factor:
“People get too angry about X Factor and talent shows. Just let them get on with it; you need that to kick against. People talk about how that’s ruined everything but there’s always been shitty pop music,whether it came from a television show or not.”
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Posted: 11th, September 2013 | In: Celebrities, TV & Radio | Comment
Michael Le Vell is a victim of the State-sponsored assault on adults
MICHAEL Le Vell had to prove his innocence. The Daily Mirror reserved a special place on its front page for the man who works as an actor on Coronation Street. The Mirror used words like “truth” and guilty” to report on Le Vell as he was tried for child sex crimes.
Le Vell’s aunt Pat Gallier, 67, told media:
‘The police seem to be arresting celebrities and accusing them of child-sex offences without seeming to check if there’s enough evidence. Michael’s been caught up in this witch-hunt. This has changed him – people will never look at him the same again.”
She’s right. As Brendan says:
I’ve been waiting for weeks to say what complete bullshit this case seemed to be. It had flashes of false memory syndrome, therapeutic fantasy, and of course post-Savile hysteria about abusive celebs. Thank God for juries, an oasis of reason in a mad world.
A CPS spokesman said:
“This case was reviewed in great detail. On the basis of the reviews the CPS concluded that there was sufficient evidence for a realistic prospect of conviction. Whilst the CPS needs to consider if a conviction is realistic, the jury needs to be sure that the defendant is guilty beyond reasonable doubt. We of course respect the verdicts they have reached today…”
Of course.
‘There has been a fundamental shift in the way that we assess the credibility of the alleged victims in these cases, as demonstrated by the Savile and recent grooming cases such as that in Rochdale, but the evidential test remains the same.”
The shift being that all adults are now mistrusted.
The Indy notes:
In June a jury at Liverpool Crown Court took just 29 minutes to clear former Coronation Street actor Andrew Watkinson who played Frank Foster of four counts of indecently assaulting a 15-year-old boy in the 1990s.
Now cleared, the Press react with a few puns and rhymes. Only the Daily Mail leads with the important question: why did this case ever come before a jury in the first place
The Indy rhymes Le Vell with Hell:
The Sun clumsily works in a brand endorsement
The Star is all boozed up – clear rhymes with beer
The Mirror gets poetic about “Corrie Kev”
I’ve lost two years of my life
to this hgell
but at last it’s over
says Michael Le Vell
And the Mail gets it
The Mail offers some background to the case:
As Le Vell walked free, it emerged that the CPS initially ruled there was insufficient evidence to charge him after his arrest in September 2011. But the decision of Nazir Afzal, Chief Crown Prosecutor in the North West, not to prosecute was over-ruled by Alison Levitt QC, the principal legal adviser to the Director of Public Prosecutions for England. The victim’s mother made a formal complaint in February 2012 and asked for the decision to be reviewed. The girl also made further allegations and the actor was charged in February this year.
The Mail adds:
After his initial arrest in September 2011, the actor was the subject of an intense police investigation. The alleged victim was interviewed on video by specialist officers trained to deal with such cases and she told them about the abuse and rape in detail. The DPP’s Principal Legal Advisor, Alison Levitt QC (left) overruled Chief Crown Prosecutor, Nazir Afzal, (right) who had decided there was insufficient evidence to charge le Vell with any of the abuse or rape allegationsAfter the police investigation had been concluded a file of evidence was passed on to the Crown Prosecution Service North West.
Both parties were both told of this decision in late December 2011 and Le Vell was said to be ‘relieved and delighted’ at the decision. However the victim’s mother was said to be furious and after speaking with police officers she made a formal complaint against the CPS in February 2012. The girl also returned to the police in March 2012 told them she had forgotten to mention other rapes she had suffered at the hands of the actor.
The Jimmy Savile sex scandal erupted in October 2012 causing a wholesale re-evaluation of sex cases, particularly those offences against children.
The CPS tells us:
“She [Levitt] concluded that there was sufficient evidence for a realistic prospect of conviction and that the earlier decision not to prosecute should be overturned. In addition the victim made further allegations to the police in March 2012 which were investigated by the police. The Principal Legal Advisor also reviewed this additional evidence and in February 2013 authorised that the defendant be charged with 19 offences in total. All victims now have the right, if they are concerned about a decision not to charge, to ask for the case to be looked at again. This process enabled the CPS to re-review this case, to consider the evidence afresh including some further allegations by the victim, and to bring charges.”
A “legal source” tells the Telegraph:
“There was not a shred of evidence to support the girl’s claims. There was a basic lack of evidence. I have never known a case such as this to go to court with no evidence he had any interest in child pornography or other telling indicators.
There was not even the remotest suggestion from anyone, other than the alleged victim, that he had even looked oddly at a child – let alone had a sexual interest in children. Any professional jury would have cleared him but in a court trial you can sometimes be swayed by emotion and not fact.”
The Times reported this nugget of courtroom drama:
She said her daughter spoke about the alleged abuse after attending a self-help conference and that her daughter was “very calm” and told her that she remembered the alleged attacks “all the time”…
The witness said: “In the car she said, ’It’s happened a lot more than I’m making out Mummy. It’s a lot worse.’
“She said, Mummy, you don’t want to know.”’
…the burden of proof required to bring a prosecution has seemingly been lightened to a degree that simply does not serve justice. This is especially true when the abuse is not recent: in the Le Vell case, a rape at the age of six is being alleged in court by someone who is 17; in Savile’s case, not to mention the rash of cases that followed, the time between alleged abuse and serious police action was even longer.
So although I don’t doubt that some of the ‘victims’ in these cases are telling the truth, I simply do not believe they all are.
Meanwhile, the mantra that ‘we must listen to what children say’ has subtly changed to ‘we must believe what children say’. The police and the CPS, knowing this, bring flimsy cases – like Le Vell’s – that should never have seen the light of day.
So another career bites the dust, and another man – heart, soul and reputation – is ruined.
What about the alleged victim, who wasn’t?
Duncan Barkes asks: “Should the law change to grant anonymity to those charged with sex offences?”
Jerry Wright notes:
“It must be awful to be accused of something you haven’t done, facing a nightmare of twelve months knowing your innocent, but trying to find any proof that you were not at the scene of an alleged crime. Mr Le Vell, 48, who plays Kevin Webster in Coronation Street had denied 12 charges in total, telling the jury he was “fighting for his life” During the trial Mr Le Vell admitted he was an alcoholic who had a series of one-night stands throughout his 25-year marriage. What makes my blood boil is, his name, his career, his personal details were all made public, and the accuser was kept secret, as the girl is still a teenager, and her parents too, who no doubt wanted just to cash in on Mr le Vell’s celebrity status!”
The accuser is afforded lifetime anonymity.
The last words are Le Vell’s, who told the court:
“I’m like a lost soul and I still want to get to the bottom of why this has happened to me and why I’m being accused of this, because I know none of this happened. I have been walking around for the last two years just not knowing.”
Such are the facts…
Posted: 11th, September 2013 | In: Celebrities, Reviews | Comments (4)
Bob Geldof to be blasted off into space
NEVER, in the history of humankind, has someone from Ireland been sent into space… unless you count the people who think they’ve been there after losing their sight and minds drinking poitín cut with antifreeze.
However, that’s all about to change as Bob Geldof is all set to become the first Irishman to travel into space when he spends $100,000 on a ticket for the inaugural Space Expedition Corporation (Sxc) commercial flight next year.
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Posted: 11th, September 2013 | In: Celebrities | Comments (3)
Spare a thought for Michael Le Vell, victim of the tabloid-friendly cult of child abuse
SPARE a thought for Michael Le Vell, or “Coronation Street actor Michael Le Vell, as he is known. The 48-year-old has been cleared of 12 child sex abuse charges, including rape.
Michael Turner, to use his real name, is the victim. His accuser, said he’d attacked her from six until she was 14. She remains anonymous.
He stood in a glass dock for all to see.
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Posted: 10th, September 2013 | In: Celebrities, Reviews | Comments (7)
Miley Cyrus with dwarves
ANROAK is unsure what you make of Miley Cyrus but we’re warming to her. Cyrus is tapping into the problem of being a famous face in the modern age: why wait for paparazzi to shock tour fans with photos of you being a berk when you can best them to it. Take control, Miley.
Here she is posing with dwarves:
Posted: 10th, September 2013 | In: Celebrities | Comments (7)
Susan Boyle’s Christmas LP to feature Elvis’ ghost
REMEMBER when everyone didn’t think Susan Boyle could sing because she wasn’t a young woman with an attractive face, wearing a snapback cap hi-tops? Then she sang with that soaring Radio 2 voice and everyone felt a bit bad, before continuing to continually talk about her looks because we’d learned nothing?
Well, while everyone has been working out whether they’re arseholes or not, Susan has been conquering the world with her easy-listening, raking in huge amounts of cash and forgetting all about us sausage roll dribbling plebs who have to queue up for things and worry about our mobile bills.
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Posted: 10th, September 2013 | In: Celebrities, Music | Comment (1)
Pippa Middleton shows off her latest arse in fu**ing red trousers
PIPPA Middleton has a new arse, and she’s keen to show it off to one and all.
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Posted: 9th, September 2013 | In: Celebrities, Royal Family | Comment
How James Blunt prevented World War III – but not how you think
JAMES Blunt says he prevented World War III. How so? Were his song splayed on loop across the battlefields until everyone agreed to stop shooting?
Blunt says that when in Kosovo he disobeyed an order to shoot at Russian troops who had arrived first at Pristina airfield. It was 1999.
British Gen Sir Mike Jackson backed him by saying:
“I’m not going to have my soldiers be responsible for starting World War III.”
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Posted: 9th, September 2013 | In: Celebrities | Comment
New RoboCop trailer released – start wetting yourself with excitement, now!
THE original RoboCop movie was a tense, bleak affair and any notion of remaking it was going to set everyone’s phasers to ‘uh-oh’. With that, the release of the trailer for the new movie will inevitably swing people either way.
Of course, there’ll be haters… but they’re wrong. That’s because the new RoboCop looks ACE!
Joel Kinnaman replaces Peter Weller as Murphy, who goes from Injured Cop to Super Cool Robot Cop.
There’s a fun cast too, including Samuel L. Jackson (of course), Gary Oldman and Michael Keaton (welcome back!), plus Abby Cornish as Murphy’s wife.
The new trailer shows loads of things getting shot, blown up and punched, which is all well and good, but the best bit is when Michael Keaton basically says ‘let’s make him look more bad-ass by making RoboCop’s suit black’.
There’s also a lovely ‘who is in control of the technology? The machine or man?’ which we’ll no doubt be able to read into, concerning our own technological habits… but mainly, it looks like it’ll be a hoot with loads of fighting and a cool baddie.
RoboCop should be released on Feb. 7, 2014. Here’s the trailer.
Photo :Michael Keaton, left, Samuel L. Jackson, center, and Joel Kinnaman attend the “RoboCop” panel on Day 3 of Comic-Con International on Friday, July 19, 2103 in San Diego.. (Photo by Jordan Strauss/Invision/AP)
One Direction fans threaten to kill Aston Villa’s Gabby Agbonlahor for tackling puking Louis Tomlinson
ASTON Villa’s Gabby Agbonlahor has been the subject of death threats on Twitter following his tackle on One Direction and Doncaster Rovers’ Louis Tomlinson at charity football match for former Villa and Celtic man Stan Petrov who was diagnosed with leukaemia.
After the forward’s challenge, Tomlinson went to the sidelines and threw up.
The One Direction fans duly moved on from threatening to murder GQ magazine staffers by threatening to murder a professional footballer:
Erica Ramirez ∞ ♥ @BelievingInMe_1 – I’ll Kill You Gabby Agbonlahor For Hurting My Man @Louis_Tomlinson
“@gabby_10 This guy hurt Louis knee. I shall hurt your face. I better hear that you apologized or I will find you, and I will kill you.”
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Posted: 8th, September 2013 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts, Sports | Comment
Songs to tan by: Samantha met Doe de Waddy Waddy
SONG of the week: Samantha met Doe de Waddy Waddy.
Samantha seems to be the one in the middle, who looks like John Terry wrapped in old Leeds United flag. The backing signer are dressed by Woman at Grammar for Genitals, a kind of Dutch Caps Lock:
