Key Posts Category
Rumer Willis’ 21st Birthday Party In Pictures
RUMER Willis is 21. She’s having a birthday party at the TAO Nightclub, Venetian Hotel and Casino, Las Vegas.
In keeping with such a starry event there’s a photographer taking pictures of the guests as they arrive. These pictures are a keepsake, a going home present – Hollywood’s version of a piece of birthday cake wrapped in a napkin and a Noddy pen.
To go with the photographer, there are other entertainers – the tattooist, the sex tape expert (“your face in their place!”) and a plate of egg white omelettes for the chauffeurs to chow down on as they wait to pick up the kids.
Anorak was at the do, and we now bring you pictures from it, featuring Margo Harshman, Briana Evigan, Audrina Patridge, Rumer Willis, Jamie Chung, Winky The Bear and Smartie Artie.
Tits and teeth ladies:
Posted: 16th, August 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comment
Katie Price Bans Harvey And ‘Ruins’ Peter Andre
KATIE Price and Peter Andre Divorce – Katie bans Harvey, bans sex, vows to ruin Peter Andre and wishes him the best of luck…
The People: “JORDAN SLAPS HARVEY BAN ON PETER ANDRE
EXCLUSIVE”
That’s right, Harvey fans, no Harvey in Peter Andre: Moving On. Harvey has moved on.
Thankfully, Harvey – he was always the star – will be in Katie’s own fly-in-the-Touch-Eclat show What Katie Did Next.
Says the show’s narrator:
“Guests are arriving including Harvey. But his mother has refused permission for him to be filmed.”
In Pete’s show expert lots of pictures of sentimental Pete cuddling his children and being cuddled, in private moments. Expect lots of sentiment and forlorn looks and loadsa tears – as the Mirror says:
Peter Andre’s tears: Star breaks down 10 times on TV special charting end of marriage to Katie Price.
But no Harvey.
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Posted: 16th, August 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comments (6)
Kerry Katona Takes ‘Cocaine’ In Her En Suite Bathroom
FOR Kerry Katona life follows art, as the News of The World watches the star of the MTV show Kerry Katona: Crazy In Love taking “cocaine” and going “mad”:
KERRY KATONA GOES MAD ON COKE AFTER 4-DAY BOOZE BENDER
Look on as:
SHAMELESS Kerry Katona pushes a rolled £20 note up her nose before swiftly snorting a line of cocaine – and every second is caught in shock detail on video.
Yeah, a £20 note. It’s alright for some. Not too long ago we feared Kerry was on her uppers. Now she is – but able to use a £20 note to administer them.
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Posted: 16th, August 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comment
Jade Goody Presents Pride Of Heaven Awards
“JADE Goody would be so proud” states the Daily Mirror’s front-page headline.
Jeff Brazier, Jade Goody’s old sparring partner, tells Mirror readers that Jade’s boys talks to her in heaven “and what he real thinks of Jack”.
We too are proud of Jeff for telling us how proud Jade is. They are the winners of Anorak’s first Pride of Heaven awards.
Jade Goody’s two young sons look up to the sky and ask: “Daddy, has Mummy’s hair grown back in Heaven?”
Dad Jeff Brazier hugs Bobby, six, and four-year-old Freddy tight, and smiling says: “‘Yes, Mummy’s got her hair back, she’s looking her best, wearing the lovely clothes she used to and she’s happy and joking a lot’.
“Whether it’s right or wrong, that’s what I tell them,” says Jeff.
Jackiey Budden, the Jade Goody Mum, could always ask Jade what she’s wearing at the next televised séance.
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Posted: 16th, August 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comment (1)
Paris Jackson’s ‘Aunt’ Slams Mark Lester And Gary’s Michael Jackson Memorial
MICHAEL Jackson Watch: Anorak’s at-a-glance look at Michael Jackson in the news – Mark Lester’s ex-wife Jane says Paris Jackson not his, Mark Lester is “nuts” and Gary pays for the Jackson memorial show.
LAST week we heard that Mark Lester could be the father to Michael Jackson’s three children (and counting), or not. We were invited to note the resemblance between his daughter Harriet and Jackson’s daughter Paris.
Now the Mail’s Alison Boshoff tells us:
Is my ex-husband Mark Lester the father of Jacko’s children? No, he’s completely nuts
Jane Lester sighs heavily when you ask whether her former husband Mark, the child star made famous by Oliver!, could possibly have made a sperm donation to Michael Jackson in 1996 – and thus be the biological father of Michael’s eldest children, Prince Michael and Paris Jackson…
It’s certainly a startling story – but can it possibly be true? And what, you wonder, would prompt Lester, now living obscurely as a 51-year-old osteopath in Cheltenham, to tell such a story?
Well, wonder no more, Alison Boshoff, because, er, last week Lester told us:
Now I’m not able to have any communication with the children. My repeated phone calls aren’t returned and emails go unanswered. This isn’t what Michael would have wanted. I feel I have to come forward, as my only way of saying, ‘Please don’t shut me out!'”
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Posted: 15th, August 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comments (2)
‘Despicable’ Katie Price’s C*nt And Dignified Peter Andre Sobs
KATIE Price and Peter Andre Divorce: Peter’s calls Katie “despicable”, Katie calls her old agent a “cunt”, Peter sobs and the recorded truce goes on…
Daily Star: “PETER: IT’S WORST DAY OF MY LIFE”
Earlier in the week, Peter Andre drew a line with his nail in the Touche Eclat and said he and Katie Price should call a truce and say now more about the matter of their divorce. His album would sell on its own merits. There would be no mention of Katie Price. That’s K.A.T.I… Now read:
TORMENTED Peter Andre suffered his worst day since his split from Kate Price yesterday – after seeing his wife romping in a park with her new lover. The Aussie singer, 36, sobbed as he gazed at our pictures of Jordan’s new man, cage fighter Alex Reid, getting frisky with her and playing daddy to the kids.
And he slammed Jordan, 31, for using his children as “pawns” in her bitter publicity war against him.
Prawns? How very Australian. One for the cook book.
The Star focuses eyes on “cruel Kate” and “giggling Junior”.
Now Pete The Dignified tells “pals”, who tell the Star, who tell readers:
“God only knows what is going on in that house if they behave like that in a public park. I just hope my kids are not being exposed to that behaviour every day.”
We then get this gem:
Peter spent the day with his management team and stuck to his vow of keeping quiet about his split from Kate.
So did he say anything or not? The Star seems unsure. Meanwhile, in the hedonistic world of Katie Price:
Kate prised herself away from her new lover yesterday and took a family day trip to the Isle of Wight.
And what of Pete keeping quiet and not using the kids as prawns, not dragging them into the media war?
Daily Mirror: “Katie Price branded a “despicable mother” by Peter Andre”
This is way with truces. Dignified Peter Andre who has already called his estranged wife “cheap” and “disgusting“ and says Katie Price makes “dirty money” now calls her “despicable“. Peter Andre is working his way through the “ds”. Next up: dastardly, devilish and disgraceful.
But let us say now more about it…
Horrified Peter Andre accused Katie Price of being a “despicable mother” during an expletive-filled row witnessed by the Mirror. The singer was incensed after discovering Katie was teaching their children to swear – using the C-word in front of Junior, four, Princess, two, and Harvey, seven.
During the ferocious six-minute phone conversation Katie, 31, instructed Junior to use vile and offensive language.
The Mirror was with Peter, 36, throughout the conversation.
What are the odds?
Katie then took the phone back from the youngster and launched a vicious attack on her former manager Claire Powell, who still represents Peter. She called her a “fat, ugly, evil c***.”
The emotional singer retaliated, calling Katie a “despicable mother” and a “disgrace”. By chance, the argument was captured by an ITV2 camera crew filming for Peter’s reality show. It is not yet known whether the row will make
D is for Dignity – thy name is Peter Andre.
Posted: 15th, August 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comments (4)
Gay George Michael ‘Dead’
GEORGE Michael is not dead. George Michael has been “arrested on suspicion of driving under the influence of drink or drugs” after his silver Land Rover was involved in a collision with a truck on the A34 near Newbury, Berkshire.
Well, so the papers say.
In truth, Michael is taken to Lodden Valley police station, near Reading. At 5:55am he is released without charge. He is well. He was not arrested, merely questioned, as is routine.
The Mirror has the, er, “exclusive”:
EXCLUSIVE: George Michael arrested after crashing his Range Rover into back of lorry at 1am
And if you want more facts:
“George Campbell, boss of the firm that owns the truck, said he could have been seriously injured or even killed.”
Wham! Another celebrity death – averted. The Sun confirms the news that Michael is alive, but expected more from “Gay George”:
Onlookers feared George, 46 was DEAD as he sat dazed in the mangled motor for ten minutes near Newbury, Berks.
And George Michael – how is he?
“He was quite merry and wanted a lift but didn’t say where to. He was wearing glasses, a black baseball cap, a tight-fitting black T-shirt, black trousers and Crocs shoes. He carried a satchel.”
Crocs… Ew. He was in bad way:
The motor was a write-off and the gay singer – described as “away with the fairies” – survived by a miracle.
A car crash follwied by a bit of light gay bashing. The sun’s font-page headline screams:
“GEORGE MICHAEL SHUNTS TRUCKER IN REAR.”
Only Michael wasn’t out of it. He failed no drink nor drugs test. He was not arrested. He is not dead.
Sky News says Michael’s car is worth £80,000, although given the state of his health this might rise (it’s memorabilia, right) or if he’s well, fall (repairs aren’t cheap).
Of course, this is the same George Michael who in 2007 admitting being unfit to drive when he watched the light show at the junctions between Cosmic Cricklewood Lane and Hendon Way, North London. Red. Orange. Green. Red. Orange… Anyone else see the lights in the sky?
And this means the media must look over his driving history, yer honour.
Michael was cautioned by police for possession of cannabis after being found in a similar state at Hyde Park Corner in February, 2007. At the time he issued a statement claiming it was “my own stupid fault as usual”, and later penned a song inspired by the experience. In April, 2007 the former Wham! star was in the news again when he collided with three parked cars near his north London home.
In May 2004, he wrote off his BMW on the A40 in Acton, west London, and crashed into railings.
The Scottish Daily Record has more news, yer honour:
Michael’s most notorious brush with the law came in 1998, whenhe was detained for lewd conduct in a public toilet in Los Angeles by an undercover police officer.
Does he have an in-car toilet?
In August 2009, George Michael was involved in a car accident in which no-one was hurt.
End of.
Posted: 15th, August 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comments (7)
Susan Boyle Sings On Alan Carr’s Chatty Man
SUSAN Boyle Watch: Susan Boyle is on Channel 4, appearing with Alan Carr, the product of Eric Morecambe’s coupling with Larry Grayson.
Susan Boyle is on Channel 4, appearing with Alan Carr, the product of Eric Morecambe’s coupling with Larry Grayson.
But it turns out this is not Boyle but Amanda Holden, the woman who also appears on the Britain’s Got Talent YouTube hit in her capacity as a judge.
The Sun says this is “a cruel send-up of fragile singing sensation Susan Boyle”. And it is. It is also a cruel send up of Carr’s show that seems unable to find new material or a decent guest, and is forced to interview another self-promoting TV product about another reality TV show product.
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Posted: 14th, August 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comments (84)
Bar Refaeli Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue Pictures
BAR Refaeli is spotted in behind the scenes pictures of the 2010 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue. No burkini for Ms Rafaeli, who opts for the trim speedo-style swimwear to keep her on top of her game.
And no go faster swimsuit. Bar Refaeli is a sports purist, a Corinthian, who relies on what god gave her and minimal fibres to go higher, faster and for longer.
What sport Refaeli is famous for is a moot point, but a survey of the Anorak typing pool tells us that she is something of the dartist and once pulled off her double top to great effect.
These pictures are courtesy of Sports Illustrated’s editor MJ Day. The interview – Flippers Are This Year’s Crocs – is our own work:
Posted: 13th, August 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comment
Madeleine McCann Spotted On Camber Sands And The Funniest Our Maddie Joke Ever
MADELEINE McCann Watch: Anorak’s at-a-glance look at Madeleine McCann in the news – Maddie spotted on Camber Sands, the funniest Our Maddie joke ever, Tracey Connelly and Rhonda Wyllie explains…
It’s the Third Summer of Our Maddie and Mary Gold relives the apogee of the Our Maddie frenzy. Experience the horror that is Mary Gold’s Maddie & Me:
Daily Mail: “I looked away for a moment and my daughter had vanished: A mother reveals the terrifying 25 minutes she lost her child at the beach”
Mary Gold fears the worst – with a story to write she had best act fast…
She’d gone in the blink of an eye. One moment my three-year-old daughter was playing beside me in the sand on a Sussex beach. The next she was gone. I was distracted for something like ten seconds by an angry wasp, and when I looked up Katya had disappeared…
Paedo wasp!
I thought of Madeleine McCann, of vile and loathsome paedophiles and of Lord knows what else.
What else is there?
It is every parent’s nightmare…
It is. It is. Oh, god it is. We fear it is. And if it isn’t, it bloody well should be! Tony Parsons knows.
As journalists, Harry and I both know what a horrible world we live in. I thought of poor Sarah Payne, snatched in Sussex by a paedophile in 2000 – a story my husband had covered as a crime reporter.
Sarah Pain & Me.
And, of course, poor Maddie McCann, who was abducted in the Algarve the day after we brought Katya home from Russia in May 2007… At that moment, I felt like the world’s worst mother and I must admit I thought about Kate McCann…
Is that libel? Surely the world’s worst mother is Tracey Connelly? And he can be dad.
Ten agonising minutes later came the flood of relief. It turned out that Katya had wandered for half-a-mile – half-a-mile and she only weighs 2st.
Will she be ready for the Olympics?
She had been missing for 25 minutes, but it felt like a lifetime. Harry called me and said: ‘We’ve got her, darling, we’ve got her.’
And mummy got her story. Our Katya…
The Skinny: “Richard Herring: Hitler Moustache”
We have to dare him to go there when he asks who wants to hear his Madeleine McCann joke, which is so evil he swears he wouldn’t tell it were it not for us sickos. The audience roars its approval.
Funier than Mary Gold. Give it up, Herring…
WA Today: Wyllies say they have nothing to offer Maddie investigators
Private detectives searching for Madeleine on Sunday said they wanted to interview Perth socialite Rhonda Wyllie, the widow of Australian property tycoon Bill Wyllie, and their daughter Melissa Karlson.
Why?
A multi-million dollar luxury yacht owned by Mrs Wyllie was moored in Barcelona, Spain, three days after Madeleine disappeared from a Portugal holiday report in May 2007.
Fact! Other boats in the area include the yacht Dr Crippen once sailed on, vessels soon-to-be belonging to Somalia’s pirate navy and a rowing boat manned by a odd bearded fellow call Silus.
On Thursday, the Wyllie Group issued a statement:
“British media reports on Sunday … raised suggestions that Wyllie family members may be able to assist investigations in relation to an incident at Port Olympia, Barcelona, on the night of May 6, 2007.
The Wyllie family is perplexed with these media reports. In fact, members of the Wyllie family were in Antibes, France, that evening, not in Barcelona.”
Maddie in Antibes!
Madeleine McCann – It’s the media’s Third Summer of Our Maddie (delayed for Michael Jackson) – you seen her?
Madeleine McCann Spotted In Sweden
Posted: 13th, August 2009 | In: Key Posts, Madeleine McCann, Reviews | Comments (6)
An Invitation To Pop Hannah Montana’s Cherries
TEEN Star Hannah Montana is not to star in Disney Jailbait – Home On The Range, On The Drier, On The Porch – yet, but you can appreciate her talents by chewing on her official oral sex training gums, and pop a bag of her official Red Cherries.
It’s all deliciously tasteful, of course.
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Posted: 13th, August 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comments (5)
Katie Price Inflates Chantelle As Peter Andre Ends It All
KATIE Price and Peter Andre divorce: Chantelle Houghton’s promoted at Princess Tiaamii’s birthday, Jordan’s upset, Jordan the TV mogul and Peter Andre will not say anything more about it LIVE on Sky News…
STV: “Katie Price ‘not happy’ Chantelle met her kids”
Katie Price has admitted that she is unhappy that Chantelle Houghton has been introduced to her kids, a report claims.
In case the kidzzzz mistake Chantelle Houghton, for it is she, for their lookalike mum? And what of Katie Price’s partially sighted son Harvey who may start to think the he is in the care of not two but four giant space hoppers? Indeed, given how much mum’s face has altered, Harvey can glue a serving spoon onto a pair of watermelons and never be far from a mother figure.
The glamour model’s estranged husband Peter Andre invited the Celebrity Big Brother winner to Princess Tiaamii’s second birthday party, according to Now! magazine. Katie, who is currently dating cage fighter Alex Reid, said: “I was not happy.
“I have kept my mouth shut on this for a couple of weeks but it has upset me. She doesn’t even know my children so I cannot understand why she is at the party.”
To pop out of the cake? To twist her inflatables into the shape of a dog? Says a Peter Andre source in The People:
“She was invited to the party because she belongs to the same management company as Pete.”
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Posted: 13th, August 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comments (8)
Tracey Connelly’s Lesbian Lover And Baby P’s Flesh
BABY P Watch – Anroak’s round-up of Peter Connelly, Tracey Connelly, Steven Barker and Jason Barker in the news – Tracey’s lesbian fling, evil flesh and Rose West…
THE focus on Baby P’s “evil” mum Tracey Connelly goes on as the Sun reveals: “Baby P mum is lesbian.”
Phwoarr, indeed, readers. Can Tracey Connelly become Racey Tracey and so be accepted into tabloid society? The Sun doesn’t give readers Tracey’s vital statistics, but she’s a hefty lass.
And so to today’s The Big Debate: does Tracey Connelly wait until she’s lost weight and had her hair done before she poses with her naked chest pushed into another woman – or does she just go for it now?
Or is she one of those lesbians, the broadcast’s media’s last taboo, a wimmin in sensible shoes who you never see on the telly unless she’s talking about a dull book or genital mutilation in Soviet Central Asia?
The Sun is here to help:
THE twisted mother of tortured Baby P had a LESBIAN fling in prison, The Sun can reveal. Callous Tracey Connelly, 28, sneaked off to a cell with a 30-year-old brunette while in Holloway jail, North London, awaiting trial over the death of her 17-month-old baby son Peter.
No picture of the 30-year-old brunette stunna, but there is the promise of another coupling to come:
Connelly “was moved to Low Newton – which also houses House of Horrors child killer Rose West – days before a court order banning her identification was lifted on Monday.”
But wait in line, Rose. Says one lag’s lover:
“There are hundreds of women in there and they all want their piece of flesh from that evil bitch.”
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Posted: 13th, August 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comment (1)
Michael Jackson’s Glass Coffin To Go On Tour
MICHAEL Jackson Watch: Anorak’s at-a-glance look at Michael Jackson in the news – Helena is Blanket’s mum, Vienna tribute show, Madonna and Whitney Houston pull out and the Halloween spectacular…
Daily Mirror: “Michael Jackson exclusive: Blanket Jackson’s surrogate mother is a Mexican nurse named Helena”
The surrogate mother of Michael Jackson’s seven-year-old son Blanket is a Mexican nurse named Helena. As several people come forward to claim parenthood over the King of Pop’s three children, the Mirror has discovered the truth behind the birth of his youngest.
Despite rumours about who fathered the boy, we can reveal Jackson is his biological dad…
The Mirror and the NOTW are locked in a battle for Jackson’s paternity. Mark Lester says it could be him. Now the Mirror says it knows the truth:
The friend told the Mirror: “He chose Helena because she had a latino background but she was also a US citizen and had quite fair skin. He liked her because she was very attractive and seemed stable and intelligent. She was a nurse or medical assistant, which he also liked.”
And – behold – a Blanket was born:
TV producer Gary Pudney recalls that just days later, Jackson proudly introduced him to Blanket. Pudney said: “Michael told me, ‘I have something to show you, Gary.’ And he went in the back of the trailer into the little bedroom and brought out this little blanket that had something in it.”
A nose grafted onto a mouse?
“And it was the baby.”
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Posted: 12th, August 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comments (8)
Dignified Peter Andre Slams Katie Price’s Strawberry Ripples
KATIE Price and Peter Andre Divorce: “Dignified” Peter talks to the Star and Mirror, Katie’s strawberry ripples and a “Drunken slapper”…
Daily Star (front page): “JORDAN THE DRUNKEN SLAPPER. THE REASON I LEFT Kate? Look at the pictures. They tell the story”
This is Peter Andre who would never badmouth his estranged wife?
As he sat down in our newsroom…
It’s another tabloid interview with “dignified” Peter Andre who has already called his estranged wife “cheap” and “disgusting“. She makes “dirty money“.
Daily Mirror (front page): “KATE WHO”
“I am 100% over her”
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Posted: 12th, August 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comments (2)
Tracey Connelly’s Keep-Fit Video, Baby P’s Dad Sues And The Sun Owns Peter Connelly’s Soul
BABY P Watch – Anroak’s round-up of Peter Connelly, Tracey Connelly, Steven Barker and Jason Barker in the news – new prisons, new identities, Baby P’s father to sue Haringey, social workers sue and The Sun’s new grave grab…
Sky News: “Baby P Mum To Get New ID – And Fitness Guru”
But today it emerged Connelly is likely to get a new name, social security details and a costly new appearance, paid for by the taxpayer. Sources told Sky News Online these would include a new hairstyle and a fitness guru who would help her slim down.
The media hates child killers nearly as much as it hates the fat. Tracey may yet issue her own keep-fit video and diet.
Daily Mail: “BABY: NOW HIS FATHER BIDS TO CASH IN”
Baby Peter’s natural father is to sue Haringey Council for its failure to protect his son, it emerged yesterday.The grieving father is seeking £200,000 compensation, although legal experts said he could claim twice as much.
Daily Telegraph: “Baby P’s father to sue Haringey Council”
But Ann Widdecombe, the Tory MP, questioned whether Peter’s father should be entitled any compensation. “Given that he was seeing the child on a regular basis, he failed to spot the same injuries that the others failed to spot,” she said. “If he can show evidence that he reported this to social services then it would be different. But if not, why should he be compensated?”
Daily Star: “150m to huide baby P’s killers”
MORE than £150million in taxpayers’ cash could be spent protecting the killers of Baby P.
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Posted: 12th, August 2009 | In: Key Posts, Reviews | Comments (11)
PETA: Nia Long Fights The Fur Holocaust, Ronald McDonald Eats Children And Fat Vegetarians
PETA Watch: Nia Long is a Holocast survivor, McDonald’s Unhappy Meals frighten children and vegetatians are fat people too…
PETA’S new dumb Animal of the month is actress Nia Long, who refuses to wear fur, but, as D-listed notes, “she’s okay with wearing ten million layers of Photoshop!”
Nia has no crotch. Instead she has a shiny pole and a pudenda shaped like the kind of thing euro brats ski over. She also has no navel. This is what happens what you spend time naked on the New York Subway – you’re body reacts and mutates. (Peta, via YBF.)
Says Nia – As a mother…
“When I became a mother, I started to really understand the importance of all living creatures in a way that I didn’t ever think about before… There’s no difference, in my opinion, [between fur and] slavery or the Holocaust. It’s just that we’re not dealing with human beings, we’re dealing with animals, but it’s still a living thing.”
When the Austrians poured lice powder over the Jews, Nia wept. Those poor little bitty live never hurt anyone. When the rats had to live with the slaves, Nia wailed. But the truth hurts. And Peta can handle the truth, whatever the Photoshop evedence says to the contrary.
FoxNews.com has news of Peta’s anti-McDonald’s drive:
“Unhappy Meals” featuring a knife-wielding Ronald McDonald and bloody rubber chickens are upsetting parents who say the People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals are unfairly targeting their kids at McDonald’s restaurants across the country…
“I don’t want my son to be around something like this. This is not fair for a child,” Stephaine Gipson told FOX23 News in Albany.
Says PETA spokeswoman Lindsay Rajt, with no hint of irony
“I think children and adults deserve to be told the truth — and that’s that behind Ronald McDonald’s smile is cruelty to animals,”
In other news, Simon Scowl alerts us to this gem:
I would like to express my outrage at a billboard I recently saw in Jacksonville, Florida. My family was visiting, and I was planning on taking them to the beach to enjoy the beautiful day when i saw a billboard that made me want to cry.
And what’s behind Nia Long’s figure is something other than sesame seed buns.
Fat vegetarians. Don’t eat meat, be thin. Like Boy George, or him…
Posted: 11th, August 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comment
This Week In Closer: Kerry Katona’s Lap Dancer, Carol McGriffin Is Not “Slut” Katie Price And Brian Zembic’s Jordans
THIS week in Closer Magazine – Kerry Katona takes back “cheating’ Mark Croft, Jordan’s kids thinks she’s a “slut”, Carol McGriffin talks about not talking about her marriage and a man with fake breast looks for love…
Lisa Burrow, editor of Closer magazine, brings news of Kerry Katona:
“Kerry Katona’s life has, predictably, taken another turn for the worse. While on a recent make-or-break holiday to Magaluf with husband Mark she stayed in the hotel room while he went out groping and propositioning lap dancers.”
Make or break? Vote now!
Inside, Closer readers get news from Kerry’s mum Sue, who has seen pictures of Mark “climbing on top of lap dancer Claire Basset and trying to take her clothes off”. Says Sue:
“I’m worried sick about Kerry now she’s taken him back. Mark’s destroyed her self-esteem… What does he have to do to make her realise what a bastard he is?”
This might be rhetorical question, but if it’s not than Anorak suggests that Croft shag a lap dancer over the family kitchen table and spill the milk from Kerry’s breakfast cereal in her slippers.
There then follows an exchange between Sue and Kerry:
Sue: “Have you seen it – the story about Mark trying to shag the lap dancers?”
Kerry: “He’s been stitched up.”
Sue: “For God’s sake, he’s been filmed trying to shag her, what more do you need to see?”
Again the question is rhetorical. And readers are invited to submit their own answer, perhaps with pictures and drawings, and send them to Kerry Katona competition, c/o Groser magazine.
Jordan’s Mum:
Amy, the Jordan Mother, has a question for her daughter Katie Price:
“Do you want the kids growing up thinking you’re a slut?”
To your keypads, Katie. What says you, kidzzzz?
Loose Older Woman
Carol McGriffin, a dead ringer for Rodney Plonker in Only Fools And Horses tells us:
“I won’t flog my marriage like Jordan did.”
And thus we are denied the chance of seeing McGriffin dry humping 23-years-younger lover Mark Hutton and getting matching anal bleaching.
“I don’t want to flog every detail of my marriage like Jordan and Pete,” says Carol. “I want to keep everything to myself.”
So she tells Closer magazine. Is no comment still a comment?
Oksana Koslova’s Designer Vagina
Oksana had sugery six times to restore her “virginity” to please her husband. She nearly died.
“I’d realised I’d become addicted to it. I’m lucky to be alive. From now on I’ll have to get something more conventional for his birthday.”
Like a virgin in a cake and bottle of ketchup.
Brian Zembic is Jordan’s No.1 Fan
Zembic is the man with fake breasts.
Brian had his implants implanted to win a bet. He then bet a plastic surgeon to win the surgery for free. He now has a C-cup breast, far smaller than many men but enough to seduce “dozens of women”, including a “heavy-drinking contortionist from Monte Carlo and a money-obsessed manic depressive.”
Says he:
“Once the novelty of my boobs has worn off, women usually want me to have them removed. But they’re still earning me money.”
Katie Price is single…
Posted: 11th, August 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comment (1)
Baby P’s Mum Tracey Connelly And Stephen Barker, In Pictures
BABY P’s mother is called Tracey Connelly. But, then, you all knew her name. Tracey Connelly, mother to Baby Peter, has been a hate figure on the web for months.
The 17-month-old boy’s mother pleaded guilty to causing or allowing Baby P’s death, but was cleared of murder on a judge’s directions.
On 11 November, 2008, Tracey Connelly’s 32-year-old boyfriend, Steven Barker, and another man, his brother Jason Barker (aka Jason Owen) were convicted at the Old Bailey in London on the same charge. Connelly and Steven Barker are jailed for a minimum of five years. Steven Barker raped a 2-year-old girl. The Barker brothers attcked their grandmother, Hilda Barker.
We can now legally name her. This is the trigger for other Tracey Connellys to steel themselves for when their namesake leaves jail one day, as surely she must.
Baby Peter was subjected to daily torture by the mother, Tracey Connelly, step father Steven Barker and lodger Jason Barker/Owen.
Baby Of Hearts
A revolting crime. Many crimes are. But did we need to see computer-generated images of baby P’s wounds? Any sentient being can imagine the pain and the wounds. Seeing them turns us into voyeurs. And Baby P was turned into the media’s Baby of Hearts.
Carole Malone told her readers of her horror at the horror:
I HAD to force myself to read it. And every sickening, gut-wrenching detail made me want to hunt down the monsters who’d hurt Baby P—or allowed him to be hurt—and hurt THEM.
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Posted: 11th, August 2009 | In: Key Posts, Reviews | Comments (13)
Pictured: Harriet Lester ‘Sister’ To Paris Jackson
MICHAEL Jackson Watch: Anorak’s at-a-glance look at Michael Jackson in the news – Introducing Harriet Lester, Paris Jackson’s ‘sister’.
Mark Lester says he could be the father to Michael Jackson daughter’s Paris Jackson, and to the two boys, Prince Michael and Blanket.
Says Mark Lester:
“Paris is very pale, with blue eyes. All my daughters, apart from my eldest, are fair with blue eyes. So many people have commented on how alike Harriet and Paris look. Our families often holidayed together and staff, especially nannies, watching the children play together would say how similar the two girls looked.”
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Posted: 10th, August 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comments (14)
Michael Jackson Was Sold To Twitter And Mark Lester Confesses
MICHAEL Jackson Watch: Anorak’s at-a-glance look at Michael Jackson in the news – Jackson paid for Twitter, buried in LA, Mark Lester is and isn’t Paris Jackson’s father and Jackson enters school syllabus…
Metro: “Oliver star’s Jacko daughter claims were ‘twisted’”
Mark Lester – the daddy?
‘They twisted his words around. He’s not claiming to be the father of Paris Jackson,’ said a family insider.
The back-peddle comes as lawyers for the Jackson camp slammed the claims. Attorney Londell McMillan said: ‘These are just merely claims with no legal standing whatsoever.’
Digital Spy: “[Uri] Geller: ‘I knew about Lester all along”
So Lester is the Paris Jackson daddy?
Contact Music: “BRIAN OXMAN – JACKSON FAMILY LAWYER BACKS LESTER”. Says he on GMTV:
“Mark Lester is a very straight shooter, an honest man and when he describes the process by which he was asked to make a donation of sperm, I believe every word he says. Michael Jackson always told me he was the biological father so you have on one hand Mark saying he might be and Michael saying he might be – so you have the question who the daddy is. Mark always told the truth and I believe he is telling us straight right now.”
Mashable: “Company Boasts it Sold Twitter Followers to Michael Jackson”
MICHAEL JACKSON BOUGHT TWITTER FOLLOWERS: USocial Press Release
Social bookmarks to elevate social rank:
One such service is the highly-controversial paid Twitter follower service which has been offered by web promotions company uSocial.net for several months now. Now they’re claiming they’ve had the attention of some of the world’s largest names, including one interesting one in particular.
“I can’t admit that we dealt with Michael Jackson directly, though we were in touch with someone in his family recently who tasked us with conducting a Twitter campaign on an account relating to him.” Said uSocial.net CEO Leon Hill. “It was exciting to say the very least to conduct work with such a big name.”
uSocial say that 25,000 followers were bought to be delivered to Jackson’s account and they’re still working on fulfilling the order.
“For obvious reasons we’ll be dealing with his family from here on in, though it would have been great to conduct services for Michael Jackson in a different time, under different circumstances.” Said Hill.
Brand Republic: “Michael Jackson family wanted to ‘buy’ Twitter followers”
Australian marketing company uSocial.net, which sells packages of Twitter “followers”, said that Michael Jackson’s family wanted to buy 25,000 followers for the pop star’s Twitter account before he died.
Daily Mirror: “Jackson-themed merchandise approved”
Michael Jackson will be featured in calendars and collectors’ coin cases after a judge approved several deals involving the singer’s estate.
The judge at Los Angeles Superior Court signed off on agreements for Jackson-themed items including calendars, school supplies, posters and a commemorative coin.
Now Magazine: “Michael Jackson’s body is finally laid to rest”
Michael Jackson has been buried, his family’s lawyer confirms. The star died in June and a public memorial was held at LA’s Staples Centre on 7 July… It’s thought the family held a low-key ceremony at the Forest Lawn cemetery in the Hollywood Hills.
New York Times: “Gamma’s Bankruptcy Shows Shift in Photojournalism”
Jean-François Leroy, organizer of the Visa pour l’Image photojournalism festival, which runs in Perpignan for two weeks beginning Aug. 29, pointed to a declining emphasis in the media on serious subjects — what he called the “disease of the press” — as another problem.
“Photographers are producing plenty of great stuff, but now the media seem interested only in celebrities,” he said. When Michael Jackson died, it wasn’t part of the news, it was the news. How many photographs of his funeral did we really need?”
Michael Jackson – Rest in Pieces…
Posted: 10th, August 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comment
Madeleine McCann: Spotted In Australia, Rhonda Wyllie And Another Child Stolen
MADELEINE McCann Watch: Anorak’s at-a-glance look at Madeleine McCann in the news – Madeleine spotted in Byron Bay, Rhonda Wyllie named and another child is taken…
Daily Mirror: “Maddy hunt sleuths off to Australia”
Investigators searching for Madeleine McCann are flying to Australia to follow up “viable leads“.
The viable leads the McCann’s PR Clarence Mitchell called “vague” or other viable leads that could be handled by the Australian police at less of a cost to the Madeleine McCann Fund?
Boats are involved and, perhaps, the wise thing would be for private detectives to charter a yacht and retrace the route possible taken by fat Victoria Beckham’s vessel as it sailed from the Algarve to Barcelona, then onto Australia, perhaps taking in Venezuela and the Caribbean?
Judith Aron and Melissa Karlson both say they did not take Our Maddie. There is not a shred of evidence linking them to the child. They are both innocent. So what leads are the private detectives investigating?
Daily Mail: “Millionaire socialite ‘devastated’ as her £3m superyacht is linked to hunt for Madeleine McCann”
Her brother Wayne McGrath told the People newspaper: ‘I have spoken to my sister and she is absolutely devastated. She doesn’t know anything about this.’
Names named. Damaged lives. Innocent people dragged into a terrible story of a missing child. Move on…
3Nws (NZ): “Perth socialite claims yacht not involved in McCann mystery”
A Perth socialite has scoffed at suggestions her yacht may have been involved in the disappearance of Madeleine McCann.
The yacht, belonging to Rhonda Wiley, was docked at the same port where a woman was seen asking about the delivery of her new daughter – just days after Madeline went missing.
Yesterday, “Rhonda Wiley” was the Mirror’s Rhonda Whilley (which is correct).
Daily Star: “AGONY FOR MCCANNS AS 2 NEW LEADS FLOP”
An Australian woman who matched the “Posh Spice lookalike” e-fit appeared to be entirely innocent of any involvement. Judith Aron, 53, of Melbourne, said: “I have no connection to the little girl. I haven’t left Australia since 2000, so there’s no way I could have been in Portugal or Spain around the time she went missing.”
“Appeared to be innocent.” Do we now presume guilt when a name is mentioned in the same breath as the media’s Our Maddie? Any other evidence?
In another disappointment to the McCanns, a £6million superyacht was also ruled out. Detectives hired by doctors Kate and Gerry McCann, both 41, had been hunting for the vessel… The Sunseeker Yacht 105, called Will Power, flies an Australian flag.
But last night the Brit skipper insisted it was a “coincidence’’. Its owner, £250m socialite Rhonda Wyllie, 52, was not on board at the time.
The skipper said he had dropped off her and her guests in Monaco. There were no Australians on board in Barcelona and he had never taken it to Portugal.
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Posted: 10th, August 2009 | In: Key Posts, Madeleine McCann, Reviews | Comments (9)
Peter Andre Duets With La Toya Jackson And Gordon Ramsay Moves Into Katie Price’s Place
KATIE Price – Peter Andre Divorce: Peter duets with La Toya Jackson, Katie’s bored of Alex Reid, Gordon Ramsay moves in to Katie’s old palce and more…
Daily Star: “JORDAN: MY FURY”
Dominik Lemanski has more…
SHELL-SHOCKED Katie Price was plunged into despair last night after a stinging new attack from Peter Andre. The estranged couple’s vicious feud descended into all-out war yesterday, with Peter branding her “disgusting” and a “disgrace”.
And “cheap“. Don’t forget that.
But that was before details were leaked of another no-holds-barred interview to be screened on Channel 4 tonight.
You mean dignified Peter Andre is going to break his silence and in plugging his new musak on Alan Carr’s chat show?
And he reveals that the video features a crazed Jordan-style glamour model, who he says is a “possessed woman that wants to kill him”.
He’s talking about the video to his musak, the one that look like an advertorial for a spray-on air freshner:
“And then the woman ends up being an evil cow. Then, basically, she’s possessed. She’s trying to kill me. But, BUT, deep inside I know she loves me.”
Fans in the audience immediately thought he was making a thinly-veiled reference to Jordan.
Contact Music: “PETER ANDRE – KATIE PRICE BANNED FROM LOOKING AT HUSBAND”
Alex Reid, the cage fighter boyfriend of glamour model Katie Price, has banned her from looking at pictures of her estranged husband Peter Andre.
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Posted: 9th, August 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comments (5)
‘Raped’ Michael Jackson Was Castrated And Mark Lester Fathered Paris Jackson
MICHAEL Jackson Watch: Anorak’s at-a-glance look at Michael Jackson in the news – Mark Lester is Paris Jackson’s dad, and Jacko castration drugs…
News Of The World: “I’M JACKSON’S GIRL REAL DAD”
Oliver film star Mark’s amazing baby confession.
It’s Mark Lester. He’s god father to all of Jackson’s three children. He says he’s Paris Jackson’s sperm daddy. Girl for sale… Girl for sale…
Says Mark:
“It’s been a secret for so long. In 1996 Michael asked me if I would give him my sperm and I said yes. It was a gift to him, no money was paid, it was something I was honoured to do. He wanted children so badly…”
Don’t bother to wrap the gift. No need for a card. Sperm is the perfect emergency present for brithdays, weddings, Bar Mitzvah’s and more!
“With Michael’s mother Katherine now their legal guardian it’s like the kids are being isolated. Up until Michael’s memorial I was in touch with them on a weekly basis…
“This isn’t what Michael would have wanted. I feel I have to come forward, as my only way of saying, ‘Please don’t shut me out!'”
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Posted: 9th, August 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comments (21)
Madeleine McCann: Posh ‘Double’ Judith Aron, Melissa Karlson And Kate McCann’s Boat
MADELEINE McCann Watch: Anorak’s at-a-glance look at Madeleine McCann in the news – Kate McCann’s vision,
Star on Sunday: “OZ COPS CHASE SUSPECT”
Release the hounds!
Sky News: “Madeleine McCann Hunt Leads To Australia”
The search for Madeleine McCann is focusing on Australia after a woman told police she knew the Victoria Beckham lookalike being sought by detectives…
A spokesman for the New South Wales Police Force said: “A Sydney woman provided a formal statement to detectives at a Sydney police station. She claims to know the identity of the woman being sought by the private investigators attached to the McCann family.”
So it’s those private cops chasing the Maddie suspect? And what of this suspect spotter’s motives?
Daily Mirror: “’MADDIE YACHT’ FOUND: OWNER’S WORTH £250M & CALLS HUNT LUDICROUS”
Frank Thorne; Justin Penrose have breaking news of the Our Maddie hunt:
Madeleine McCann detectives aim to interview a millionairess after a yacht at the centre of the inquiry into the child’s disappearance was traced. Melissa Karlson’s mother owns the £6million vessel that docked in Barcelona hours before a mystery woman asked a British tourist: “Are you here to deliver my new daughter?” But the family of the 31-year old Australian, daughter of £250million socialite Rhonda Wyllie, 52, yesterday told the Sunday Mirror any suggestion the vessel was involved with the abduction or the mystery woman was “ludicrous“.
And so another innocent party is dragged into the story of the missing child.
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Posted: 9th, August 2009 | In: Key Posts, Madeleine McCann, Reviews | Comments (42)
