Politicians Category
Politicans and world leaders making news and in the news, and spouting hot air
David Cameron Throws Snowballs Like A Girl
DAVID Cameron throws a snowball. Like a girl…
Posted: 3rd, February 2009 | In: Photojournalism, Politicians | Comments (4)
Barack Obama Is The Hot Light Of A Dawn
BARACK Obama is the light, the power and the glory:
Obama is the more perfect union. He is a house united. Obama is the New Generation and the hot light of a dawn that goes way beyond clever talk of morning in America.
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 2nd, February 2009 | In: Politicians | Comment
Shoe Thrown At China’s Wen Jiabao (Video)
THE shoe as a weapon. The shoe as protest. The shoe as thrown at China’s Prime Minister Wen Jiabao as he speaks at Cambridge University:
FOX News reports:
The protester seated near the back of the auditorium stood up during Wen’s speech and shouted: “How can you listen to this unchallenged?” before throwing the shoe that landed some distance from the premier. Wen was unhurt and police arrested the man.
Culture Me: In China throwing shoe is a sign of good fortune.
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 2nd, February 2009 | In: Key Posts, Politicians | Comments (3)
Barack Obama Wins The Superbowl As Country Freezes
GEORGE Bush. Has he gone yet? There’s a big natural disaster in the US. Who’s in charge?
Barack Obama, host of cocktail parties and Superbowl fan.
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 2nd, February 2009 | In: Politicians | Comments (2)
Barack Obama Is Fu**ing Detroit
CAN you see Barack Obama in you? Open up. Let him in.
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 1st, February 2009 | In: Politicians | Comment
The New York Times Sells Barack Obama Jugs
THE Barack Obama inauguration coffee mug is now available at the New York Times shop.
“The great thing is, when you buy two, they kind of look like him.”
Can we laugh at him yet?
Posted: 1st, February 2009 | In: Politicians | Comment
Labour Party Kinky Sex: The Top Ten Hazel Blears Turn Ons
HAZEL Blears has a list of strangers she’d like to f*ck. You need to be on the list. If you’re not on Blears’ hit list, you might not be able to vote. It’s tough. But such is democracy.
Says Blears of Labour’s Joy Division:
“Campaigning is like sex – if you’re not enjoying it, you’re not doing it right. It should never be a drudge.”
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 31st, January 2009 | In: Politicians | Comment (1)
Russia Supports Israel: Long Live The Union
RUSSIA and Israel. The links used to be very tight. Communism. The socialist dream. Kibbutz and commune:
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 30th, January 2009 | In: Photojournalism, Politicians | Comment (1)
Barack Obama Grows Orchids In The White House
BARACK OBAMA for global warming:
The capital flew into a bit of a tizzy when, on his first full day in the White House, President Obama was photographed in the Oval Office without his suit jacket. There was, however, a logical explanation: Mr. Obama, who hates the cold, had cranked up the thermostat.
Central heating for Obama:
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 30th, January 2009 | In: Politicians | Comments (3)
Iowahawk On The Chicago Village Obama Left Behind
IOWAHAWK on Obama Village: It Takes a Proverb to Run a Village
As grad student experts have long taught us, Western culture is quick to marginalize and devalue knowledge from the “Other.” For example, look at the recent ridicule aimed at the “Egg of Power” sculpture President Obama keeps in the Oval Office. There is a disturbing hint of racism to the ridicule, because that sculpture happens to refer to a traditional proverb that comes from, depending on how you Google it, either Kenya or a 1993 Hallmark Kwanzaa card. Would these critics be so cavalier in their snickering if the president had brought some traditional white art, like a Successories poster or replica Harry Potter wand?
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 30th, January 2009 | In: Politicians | Comments (5)
Al Gore, The Death Of Mr Toilet And Toilet Paper Poems
GLOBAL warming is all around us.
Thanks to global warming, snow flakes are now becoming more alike. Fact!
The ruddy faces of Mother Nature’s condition – Al Gore and John Kerry – are in Washington:
“The Science is screaming at us,” said Kerry, who, like Gore is a former Democratic Presidential candidate. Kerry also has his own tome on the threat of global warming.
“To the naysayers and the deniers out there, let me make it clear the little snow in Washington does nothing to diminish the reality of the crisis that we face,” Kerry said.
As Tim Blair says:
Note that “Science” is now a proper noun. Like “Jesus”.
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 29th, January 2009 | In: Politicians | Comment (1)
Obama Arrives At Door Of School For The Gifted
PRESIDENT Obama is on his way back to the Oval Office and – d’oh!- tries to get inside via a window instead of the nearby door.
Anorak got the scoop with our pictures of Obama’s first day at work.
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 28th, January 2009 | In: Photojournalism, Politicians | Comment (1)
Black Tea And A Vanilla Muffin For Barack Obama
IN this post-racial Age of Obama (can we have a term for it?) Detroit hack Kristen Browning-Blas writes from the world’s first green city of how change is yet to happen.
The hyphen hears of a Colorado woman who made a stand. She shall overcome:
After watching the swearing-in on TV, I hauled myself to the gym, thinking I’d march on the Stairmaster along with the parade. Our gym has a cafe/bar, and I stopped to have some soup first.
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 28th, January 2009 | In: Politicians | Comment
Barack Obama To Adopt Puppy Child
“FIRST SON will save White House marriage.”
The first son is not Obama – that was, as some assert, Jesus Christ. The first son is… Well, who? It’s the “WHITE HOUSE BABY SHOCKER!”
Says a source: “Whether or not they conceive is in God’s hands. They’re giving it about a year…”
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 27th, January 2009 | In: Politicians | Comment
The Justine Greening Award For Plain English
THIS snappy point on the Hearthrow Expansion from Justine Greening MP appears in Hansard.
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 27th, January 2009 | In: Politicians | Comment
Grazia Obama: The Day The World Fell In Love
YAAAAA! We. Love. You. Barack Obama.
Now, don’t do anything stupid, like becoming President…
Posted: 27th, January 2009 | In: Photojournalism, Politicians | Comments (2)
Nancy Pelosi Accepts Role As Contraceptive Device
NANCY Pelosi advocates a “stimulus” package for contraception. Her face will from September 2009, be used to stimulate a crisis of confidence in men and women of breeding age.
Black vans will patrol neighbourhoods of high birth rates and low incomes and beam a holographic image of Nancy into the night skies, down alleys, into cars and wherever people are copulating.
A megaphone will blurt out at all hours of the day and night:
“Before pregnancy Nancy Pelosi looked like this (picture of nubile young woman) and now after five children – Nancy Corinne, Christine, Jacqueline, Paul, and Alexandra – as well as seven grandchildren she looks like this.”
Then the clincher: “Nancy Pelosi is 15.”
In schools, adolescents will be encouraged to masturbate frequently and take classes in premature ejaculation (see poster of the young Pelosi). Pelosi, a Catholic school graduate, will seek out predatory priests and get them to scare the kidz off sex by a series of one-on-one sessions.
All hot water will be turned off, boys will be issued with a regulation sponge and collecting vial (with calibrated targets) and girls… Well, women don’t like sex anyhow, do they Nancy, so they will all become lesbians, nuns, Democrat party congress women or anti-global warming activists.
Advert breaks in football matches will be reduced to 11 seconds. And a new sex education book will teach students that to have really good sex you must first ingest handfuls of cat fur and nail polish, a truism backed up by a big online porn drive.
Says Pelosi:
The exchange:
The revelation came during an exchange Sunday morning on ABC’s THIS WEEK.
STEPHANOPOULOS: Hundreds of millions of dollars to expand family planning services. How is that stimulus?
PELOSI: Well, the family planning services reduce cost. They reduce cost. The states are in terrible fiscal budget crises now and part of what we do for children’s health, education and some of those elements are to help the states meet their financial needs. One of those – one of the initiatives you mentioned, the contraception, will reduce costs to the states and to the federal government.
STEPHANOPOULOS: So no apologies for that?
PELOSI: No apologies. No. we have to deal with the consequences of the downturn in our economy.
Lights fade. Mood music. Sound of muffled sobbing…
Say What, Speaker Pelosi?
Pelosi: Cutting Poor Babies Accelerates Economic Growth
Maybe it’s all that talk about “stimulus”
Kids are Free! Who Knew?
That’s Probably It
Pelosi’s Inane Rant of the Day
Cheaper to kill ‘em than to pay for them
Pelosi: Contraception is Good Stimulus for the Economy
Posted: 26th, January 2009 | In: Key Posts, Politicians | Comments (4)
Barack Obama Stories To Come With Sick Bag
A READER of the free London newspaper The Metro, considers Barack Obama:
Would it be possible to provide free sick bags with future copies of Metro? Mainly because if I have to endure yet another grovelling, adoring and sycophantic article or letter concerning how supremely wonderful, handsome, awe-inspiring and all round God-like Barack Obama is, I will be in real danger of emptying my breakfast on to the good people riding my train.
It’s time to get a grip, everyone.
Oliver, London, UK.
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 26th, January 2009 | In: Politicians | Comments (2)
New Homes For Guantanamo Bay Mates At LAWNS 12-Step Programme
GUANTANAMO Bay is closing and Old Mr Anorak has selflessly offered to find bed and board for three and maybe four – should Svetlana not return for her trip to the immigration centre – of the Bay’s more handsome residents.
OMA is not obsessed with looks, far from it. He would often compliment the first Lady OMA on her top knot of sun-kissed skin upon which her thatch of blonde hair perched like a smug Tweety pie on a comatose Sylvester (Memoirs Vol. IX, Chapt. XXXVI).
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 26th, January 2009 | In: Key Posts, Politicians | Comments (2)
The Obama Pot Head Chia For A Natural Natural High
OBAMA ownbrand smack is not to everyone’s tastes. So for amilder buzz Anorak brigns you the Obams weed.
It’s the natural natural high.
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 25th, January 2009 | In: Photojournalism, Politicians | Comment
On Harry Potter, Snape, Moonie Labour Lords And Cash For Amendments
THE Sunday Times’s scoop that the former Energy Minister, Lord Truscott was offering to put down amendments to legislation in the House of Lords in return for money – something he denies – is taken up by the BBC.
Readers are treated to this gem:
One of the other peers named, Lord Moonie, a former defence minister, told the BBC that he had been suspicious of the people who had approached him.
Dickens opined that people have names that reflect their character or place in the world.
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 25th, January 2009 | In: Politicians | Comments (3)
George Bush: Memo To Self (Me) – Things To Do
WHEN President Barack Obama started work in the White House he noticed a piece of paper that had slipped down the back of his desk drawer. The document bore the unmistakable handwriting of the forty-third President of the United States of America.
MEMO TO SELF (ME): THINGS TO DO
1. Declare war on Geese. We need to kick the butts of geese for bringing done plane in New York. Geese are agents of evil. Dick says Saddam had geese in palaces. There¹s ya link!
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 24th, January 2009 | In: Key Posts, Politicians | Comments (8)
Praise Song for the Day: An Obama Parody
ELIZABETH ALEXANDER: Praise song for the day. A poem in celebration of Barack Obama’s inauguration, to be set to music by Bono.
It is beyond parody – in its fullness:
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 24th, January 2009 | In: Politicians | Comment
Obama Is The Heroin Of The Masses, Literally
BARACK Obama is taking us higher.
But for you struggling to feel the rapture, polcie in upstate New York have seized Obams braned herion.
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 24th, January 2009 | In: Politicians | Comment (1)
How Many Men It Takes To Shoot An Obama Pen, And Other Jokes
ON the cover of the New York Times –
President Obama’s order freezing the salaries of his senior aides and the pen he used to sign it. Doug Mills/The New York Times
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 24th, January 2009 | In: Politicians | Comment
