Reviews Category
We don’t just report off-beat news, breaking news and digest the best and worst of the news media analysis and commentary. We give an original take on what happened and why. We add lols, satire, news photos and original content.
Jewel robbers break into KFC by accident
BEING a jewel thief must be an exciting gig. Turtle neck sweaters, Milk Tray on the go and creeping around with all the suave sophistication of a cat with a tail made out of pearls. That, of course, is fiction and real jewel thieves are as thick and stupid as common-or-garden burglars.
And this is proven by two bungling oafs who thought they were going to indulge in some supreme swag taking, but instead, ended up in a KFC.
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Wild deer runs through the streets of Chelmsford to signal end of world
BADGERS are collapsing roads, tiny horses are using public transport, cows are harder than you and catfish are killing land mammals. Slowly but surely, animals are showing humans that they’re coming for them and that mankind’s time is nearing an end.
We’ve been warning you all for ages, yet no-one is taking us at all seriously.
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How do you ski if there’s too much snow?
SNOW! The Indy told us that snow was dead. The New York Times asked us in 2007: “How Do You Ski if There Is No Snow?” Man-made global warming was melting the snow.
With 67 percent of the contiguous U.S. covered by snow, the first day of 2013 marked the widest coverage of snow the U.S. has seen on Jan. 1 in the past ten years. The previous record was set in 2010, when the new year saw 61 percent of the U.S. beneath snow.
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Woman spends NYE imprisoned in a shop
NEW YEAR’S EVE is a wonderful time isn’t it? A feeling of togetherness, celebration and dodging puddles of puke and sexual sputum. Unless you’re the old woman from France who saw 2013 in while imprisoned in a supermarket.
The 73-year-old in Roubaix was shopping at an Intermarché store on December 31st when she felt ill and headed to the toilet.
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Posted: 3rd, January 2013 | In: Reviews, The Consumer | Comment
In photos: Allied Prisoners of World War 2
ALFIE Fripp has died. Fripp was the last surviving British prisoner of war on World War 2. He was 98. The RAF man was shot down by the Luftwaffe during a reconnaissance mission in 1939. He was imprisoned at 12 different PoW camps. So. What did you do in the war, then? What was life like back then for the prisoners? These photographs of Allied prisoners give us a hint:
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Posted: 3rd, January 2013 | In: Flashback, Key Posts | Comments (2)
Paedophiles like Jimmy Savile are ok: it’s the quality of the abuse that matters
JON Henley writes about his Brave New World in the Guardian:
In 1976 the National Council for Civil Liberties, the respectable (and responsible) pressure group now known as Liberty, made a submission to parliament’s criminal law revision committee. It caused barely a ripple. “Childhood sexual experiences, willingly engaged in with an adult,” it read, “result in no identifiable damage … The real need is a change in the attitude which assumes that all cases of paedophilia result in lasting damage.”
It is difficult today, after the public firestorm unleashed by revelations about Jimmy Savile and the host of child abuse allegations they have triggered, to imagine any mainstream group making anything like such a claim. But if it is shocking to realise how dramatically attitudes to paedophilia have changed in just three decades, it is even more surprising to discover how little agreement there is even now among those who are considered experts on the subject.
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Posted: 3rd, January 2013 | In: Politicians, Reviews | Comment
Malala Yousafzai can live in Birmingham – Pakistan gives father British job
DID the Taliban get what they wanted: Malala Yousafzai gone? The 15-year-old was hot in the head by the murderous loons for promoting women’s rights. Miss Yousafzia was shot in Pakistan. She was then whisked for treatment in Birmingham. Now her father has scored a job at the Pakistani High Commission. This mens she can stay in the UK.
Ziauddin Yousafzai is now education attaché at the Pakistani consulate in Birmingham.
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Vintage ads: The Milky Way in 1930
IT’S 1930 and the Milky Way boys are excited by “barely crumbling” bars of stuff:
Posted: 3rd, January 2013 | In: Flashback, The Consumer | Comment
Heil Honey I’m Home – full uncut episode of the Hitler sitcom
HEIL Honey I’m Home Full was the 1990 sitcom with the comedy Hitlers. These funmeisters would have them rolling in the aisles, or else.
In Berlin, 1938, Adolf Hitler and Eva Braun have a love-hate relationship with their Jewish neighbours in this bizarre spoof of ‘fifties American sitcoms.
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American universal jurisdiction over all world’s terrorists
AMERICA. You have us surrounded:
“A few days before Christmas, the U.S. indicted three men at the Federal District courthouse in Brooklyn for plotting suicide bomb attacks. This is an extraordinary, almost unique case: none of the people or conduct has any connection to the U.S. The defendants are foreign nationals, captured by some African government ont their way to join up with al-Shabab, the Somali Islamist group. To be clear, there is no suggestion that they planned to target American nationals or facilities, or had even ever been to this country before. This is an aggressive – and unconstitutional – assertion of universal jurisdiction. The U.S. is prosecuting foreign nationals for their participation in a foreign civil war. . . . Two months after their arrest, the prisoners were secretly indicted by a federal grand jury in New York, then clandestinely taken into custody by the FBI and flown to the United States to face trial.”
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Posted: 3rd, January 2013 | In: Reviews | Comment (1)
Al Gore gets $100m oil money for Current TV: Muhammad ibn al-Dheeb al-Ajami might laugh
AL Gore has teamed up with Al Jazeera.
Al Jazeera on Wednesday completed a deal to take over Current TV, the low-rated cable channel that was founded by Al Gore…
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Posted: 3rd, January 2013 | In: Politicians, Reviews | Comment
Man swings baseball bat at failed threesome
TO Vero Beach, Florida, where police have arrested Robert Briley, 44.
It is alleged that on December 16, Briley invited a 37-year-old male friend to join him and his 40-year-old wife in a threesome.
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The Puritan anti-fat health Nazis have lied to us it on BMI
THE BMI measure is wrong:
Dr Katherine Flegal, of the National Centre for Health Statistics in the United States, found that people who are overweight had a six per cent lower risk of death than normal weight people.
The risk for those with a BMI (body mass index) of between 30 and 35 fell by five per cent. But those grossly obese with a BMI above 35 were 29 per cent more likely to die than slim people of the same age.
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Indian gang rape lawyers are wrong to deny men’s justice
GANG rape is big news in India:
Lawyers at an Indian court hearing the case of a fatal gang-rape say they will refuse to defend the men accused of taking part in the brutal attack. The 23-year-old victim died in hospital at the weekend after 13-day struggle to survive injuries so grievous that part of her intestines had to be removed.
The medical student was allegedly raped and assaulted with an iron rod before being thrown from a speeding bus, along with her male companion.
Six men arrested over the attack have been charged with murder. Hearings are expected to begin on Thursday at the Saket district court in south New Delhi, where police will formally present a 1,000-page charge sheet against the men.
“We have decided that no lawyer will stand up to defend the rape accused as it would be immoral to defend the case,” said Sanjay Kumar, a lawyer and a member of the Saket District Bar Council.
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Posted: 2nd, January 2013 | In: Reviews | Comment (1)
Health puritans wants us to stop drinking ‘poison’
YOU boozing in January? Cancer Research UK (CRUK) doesn’t want you to. It’s Dryathlon invites non-drinking drinkers to donate al money they would have spent on booze to fund Cancer Research UK
How about Dry January, the Alcohol Concern:
Feel better. Save money. Make a difference. Your chance to ditch the hangover, reduce the waistline, and save the pennies. Your mission: to avoid that cheeky after work pint, that glass of wine on the sofa, or that big boozy night out, for the whole month. Make a real difference to the lives of those harmed through alcohol misuse by getting family and friends to sponsor you and raise money for Alcohol Concern.
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Posted: 2nd, January 2013 | In: Reviews, The Consumer | Comment (1)
Is it a bird? Is it a plane? What? It really is a flying Superman?!
IMAGINE for a moment, that you’re riding around with a friend in SoCal, and suddenly, one of you notices that Superman is flying over your head.
You’d either die from happiness or start leaping around, crazed and unable to process the information and ending up throwing up all over yourself, before hurtling yourself into the sea.
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Sandy Hook gun on sale in UK – also tanks
“MASSACRE GUNS ON SALE IN UK,” yells the Sun. “Lethal assault rifles like the one uses in America’s Sandy Hook massacre are being LEGALLY sold in Britain.”
No shocks. Back in 2009, Anorak spotted the “invisibility cloaked” tank at the Defence & Security Equipment International show, the largest world’s arms fair. In 2011, 1,200 defence manufacturers converge in London to show everything from the latest unmanned aircraft to camouflage body paint. The show is back in London this September.
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Public cycle pumps are out of order
SYDNEYS public bicycle pumps are broken:
It lasted on Bourke St for just three months before it began carrying an “out of order” sign urging cyclists not to use it. The model was the first of five stainless steel bike pumps that Sydney City Council bought for $21,500 to save cyclists from getting stuck with flat tyres…
A council spokesman in October said they chose the expensive design because it was a “robust model which will stand up to the demands of daily use while being weather resistant” and had been tried and tested in London.
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The Top 10 newspaper apologies of 2012
THE Top Ten Newspaper corrections of 2012:
The New York Times:
An article on Monday about Jack Robison and Kirsten Lindsmith, two college students with Asperger syndrome who are navigating the perils of an intimate relationship, misidentified the character from the animated children’s TV show “My Little Pony” that Ms. Lindsmith said she visualized to cheer herself up. It is Twilight Sparkle, the nerdy intellectual, not Fluttershy, the kind animal lover.
C.W. Nevius’ column about Most Holy Redeemer banning drag queen performers incorrectly stated that entertainer Peaches Christ appeared at an event at the church’s hall with a dildo shaped like a crucifix. He did not appear at the event, nor does he use the prop.
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Posted: 2nd, January 2013 | In: Key Posts, Reviews | Comment
Kidogo is the tightrope walking gorilla
KIDOGO the gorilla lives in Krefeld zoo, Germany. He moved there from Denmark’s Givskud Zoo in March, 2011.
Good on Kidogo for pushing the envelope of gorilla behaviour. The dream is that one day gorillas will no longer have to pull on human suits to get jobs as Sky Sports presenters, Middle East despots and Julia Roberts. Today the tightrope. Tomorrow, the ITV chatshow:
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New Year’s Eve 2013 – photos of global celebrations
HAPPY NEW YEAR! The world marks 2013:
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Anaïs Ni’s break-up letter to C. L. (Lanny) Baldwin
BREAK-Up letter of the day, as spotted by Emily Temple. This letter was sent by Anaïs Nin to C. L. (Lanny) Baldwin, circa 1945:
Nin had an affair with Baldwin while both were married, and went on to publish a book of his poetry. Eventually, Baldwin balked at the deception, and went back to his wife and children. He responded to the following letter by writing that Nin was “a kind of dog in the manger with men. You want them all to sit at your feet and be yours, all yours and only yours.”
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Posted: 31st, December 2012 | In: Celebrities, Flashback | Comment
Nick Cave is not University of Brighton alumnus of the year
THE Watford Observer carries a headline that might not distract you from the photo beneath:
Julie Howell honoured by Brighton Graduate Association
The Brighton Graduate Association (BGA) of the University of Brighton salutes its brightest star.
Nick Cave came along, too.
George Monbiot is The Day Today’s roving reporter
GEORGE Monbiot is doing his bit to bring back the comedy of The Day Today. He’s visited an A&E centre:
My bike slipped from under me and I rolled on to the pavement. I thought at first I was unharmed, but when I pulled myself up I found my left foot could not support my weight. I phoned a taxi. The accident and emergency department was almost deserted. It was evening, but not late enough for the broken drunks or the seasonal fight victims – goodwill to all men unless they’re looking at my bird – to start arriving…
Only one person was sitting there. There were no magazines I wanted to read, so I parked myself two spaces from him in the hope of starting a conversation. He had a number one haircut and tattoos on his neck and knuckles. His hands and face were filthy. He wore a stripey fleece jacket, like the one I once owned, until I lost it. His was thick with grease and soot, and pitted with cigarette burns.
“What are you in for?”, I asked. He held up a finger, suppurating, black and yellow, missing its nail. “Blimey. How did that happen?”
“Pig slammed it in his car door.”
“Why?”
“Because he’s a fucking pig.”
“What had you done?”
“Nothing. Fuckers were moving us on.”
“Oh. What sort of a vehicle do you live in?”
“Old ambulance.”
“So where have you moved to now?”
He looked at me then turned away without answering. I had transgressed. Travellers, as I had found when I’d written about the harassment they faced, were often – and for good reason – wary of telling people much about their lives.
Aha!
Posted: 31st, December 2012 | In: Reviews | Comments (2)
Hapless rescuers follow man into frozen lake in Wrightwood, California (video)
WHEN a man fell through the ice into the lake in Wrightwood, California, he struggled to find safety. One man kept his head and recorded the action on his camera. Others dashed to help. And one-by-one they too slid into the freezing waters.
Things to look out for:
7 seconds: “That’s seriously not even funny”
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