Sports Category
Sports news, commentary and scores with wit and added value. We compare and contrast the best and worst sports reporting in the mainstream press, blogs, TV and online. We love the English Premier League (Arsenal, Liverpool, Spurs, Manchester United and Manchester City) and all things football but we cover cricket, rugby, the Olympics, tennis, golf, F1 and highlights of the sporting year.
Olympics 2010: Rooting For Kaspar Kokk, Oh Min-Ji And Andreas Wank
ANORAK is watching the Vancouver Winter Olympics and rooting for, in no particular order: Oh Min-Ji, the South Korean speed skater, Kaspar Kokk, Estonia’s cross country star and Andreas Wank, the famous German ski-jumper…
Posted: 23rd, February 2010 | In: Sports | Comment (1)
Olympics 2010: Russia’s Oksana Dominina And Maxim Shabalin Dance The Kaka-Don’t
OLYMPICS 2010: Russia’s Oksana Dominina and Maxim Shabalin in the Figure Skating Ice Dance, Original Dance at the Pacific Coliseum, Vancouver.
It’s a kaka-don’t…
Tiger Woods Did Not Convert To Islam
TIGER Woods – the non-news news confence. There is lots of non news about Tiger. Did you hear the rumour that he has not converted to Islam and out his hair in a bun? From the Anorak Forums:
Another problem for sports scribes around the globe is they lost the in-depth feeds on the Tiger Woods non-news ‘news conference’. The Golf Writers’ Association met and voted to boycott any coverage of the event. They felt the contrived and structured way the statement was going to an invited audience – and no questions – was unacceptable, not sports news, and stayed away.
In other no news:
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Posted: 22nd, February 2010 | In: Sports | Comments (2)
Cheryl Cole Dumps Ashley By Text: After Aimee Walton, Vicki Gough, Brooke Healy And Ann Corbitt Meet Alexandra Taylor
WITH the BAFTAS coming too late for the papers, Ashley Cole and his fragrant wife Cheryl Cole dominate the tabloids. Anorak rounds up the news, starting with a fifth woman who claims to have shagged Ashley Cole. After Aimee Walton, Sonia Wild, Brooke Healy, Vicki Gough and Ann Corbitt are linked in headline top Ashley Cole, meet Alexandra Taylor It is 2004:
Back at his flat, the glamour girl said he was “really hands-on’’. She said: “He was so off his face with drink he could barely do the deed. It lasted about 15 minutes and was really lousy.’’
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Posted: 22nd, February 2010 | In: Key Posts, Sports | Comment (1)
Winter Olympics Pictures: Amy Williams Wins The Whittards Contract
OLYMPICS 2010: Great Britain’s Amy Williams score the Whittards’ tea tray contract by taking gold in Women’s Skeleton at Whistler Sliding Centre, Canada. The race is on to get the sport into the summer Games, securing another gold for Team GB as Williams slides down a greased hill in Greenwich Park, with points added for pouring tea into a cup and dunking a biscuit in it. Sport is nothing is it does not evolve…
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Tiger Woods: Michelle Titleist Upstages Josyln James And The Pussy Cat (Pictures)
TIGER Woods: the made-for-TV biopic in the can. Add some soft focus pictures of Tiger kissing wife Elin, sticking a ball in a hole, clutching a jug, the young Tiger with a dream to shag golf and a dose of M People and there’s your movie.
No word from alleged Woods’ woman Michelle Titleist, but Joslyn James, the refomed porn star in Cliff Richard’s old hair, is hanging her head at a press conference.(Woods’ women – Photos).
In the Forums, AGW writes:
“I felt I deserved to enjoy all the temptations. I was wrong”…Tiger Woods
SO was everyone else. You need to have shed-loads of money to able to run a string of eager taskmistresses, casual humps and willing porn stars to do their special thing with you.
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Posted: 20th, February 2010 | In: Sports | Comment (1)
Tiger Woods: Veronica Siwik-Daniels, aka Joslyn James, Confesses In Photos
TIGER Woods takes break from swinging Michelle Titleist to take part in mad-for-TV soft-focus biopic of his own scripting about those women (NSFW photos). Watching was Josyln James (NSFW Photos), known from hereon in as former porn star Veronica Siwik-Daniels. She claims she had an affair with Tiger Woods. Her brief Gloria Allred manages to give gull throat to this line and not choke: “Today, this was not an apology. It was a staged public relations stunt.”
no images were found
Posted: 19th, February 2010 | In: Key Posts, Sports | Comments (9)
Tiger Woods: A Flexible Branch Named Michelle Titleist And Screwing Napkins
A MERE 85 days after his car crashed into a fire hydrant, Tiger Woods sits everyone one down to tell them a story. Tiger’s been in rehab, steering his mind of sex by having images of lady pro golfers women in plus fours beamed onto his retinas.
He has also become a dab hand at laying a table for dinner, sewing cushion covers and rewiring a house.
Once he thought about flicking a rolled up ball of napkin into a cup. But the wardens saw him and he was stared at long and hard at. It was “sobering”. And then there was that time he picked up a fallen branch in the Gardens Of Regret and swung it casualy over his shoulder. He did it again. And again. And again. He felt stirred. He called the branch Michelle Titleist 909D Comp XCON5.
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Posted: 19th, February 2010 | In: Sports | Comment (1)
Accrington Stanley Replaces Toilets With Plastic Cups
ACCRINGTON Stanley – who are they? – are offering all fans a fun day out and a free chlamydia test.
The queue for the toilets can be long at half-time when they take on Bradford City so why not take advantage of an NHS cup?
Posted: 19th, February 2010 | In: Sports | Comment (1)
Tiger Woods Releases Made-For-TV Film
JOHN Terry, that loyal family man who bleeds for the cause might care to take a look at Tiger Woods, who is all set to emerge from the bunker to appear in press confrnce that will look more like a soft-focus made-for-TV film. From the Forums, AGW writes:
Grab a big bucket if you were close to vomiting watching Chelsea and former England skipper John Terry’s pathetic reinvention attempt to portray a happy marriage and beautiful if stained relationship with, allegedly, duped wife Toni….
Ashley Cole And The Secretary: The Sun Goes For Chelsea Star And Plays Footsie With John Terry
Tiger Woods is going to show us all how public reconstruction is done with the right kind or mega-sport swing.
John Terry allegedly paid-off alleged former squeeze and mother of his ex-best mate’s son Vanessa Perroncel.
Nothing so crass for the Tiger.
Terry was aided and abetted by News Corporation owners of the scandal-breaking News of The World which ran then spiked the affair story to allow sister paper The Sun to run the John and Toni Terry reaffirm their love fairy-story.
Tiger, on the other hand will apologise for his infidelities in a “news conference” tomorrow (Friday, Feb. 19).
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Posted: 18th, February 2010 | In: Sports | Comments (2)
Tiger Woods Press Conference: Pictures
TIGER Woods will this Friday address “a small group of friends, colleagues and close associates at 11:00 a.m. EST Friday at the TPC Sawgrass Clubhouse in Ponte Vedra Beach, Florida.”
“Tiger plans to discuss his past and his future and he plans to apologize for his behavior.”
It only took 3 months to deliver his materclass on how to play golf and get sex. The two things always seemed so opposed…
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Death, Cheating And The Winter Olympcis In Pictures
THE Winter Olympics in pictures: the sports are for those with access to snow and cold. And then Canadians have had more access than most, practicing on the courses while other looked on. Nodar Kumaritashvili has 26 goes on the luge track. He died. Canadians had hundreds. Is that cheating? But, then, why do we want? We watch for danger and horror falls. “Ouch! That’s gotta hurt” should be the Winter Olympics tagline. These are the best pictures so far:
Why John Terry Escapes And The Sun Guns For Ashley Cole
WHILE News Cops cheers for John Terry, spiking the story of his alleged sex with Vanessa Perroncel and other women, replacing that with tales of a man of “candour” and love, the Sun guns for Ashley Cole, alleged sex texter?
Cole enjoys a tabloid profile between paedophile and MP. He has not helped himself in the past, (* “EXCLUSIVE WHAT COLE’S PEOPLE TOLD BLONDE HE BEDDED – If you’re pregnant, we’ll fix it”) but why should the Sun lead with a picture of Ashely on a mobile phone – and just as Terry zooms off to Dubai? While, we wonder, we remind you of this:
* The multi-millionaire Chelsea ace – nicknamed Cashley and on £82,000 a week – threatened to sue The Sun for aggravated damages if we published pictures showing him beside a beautiful blonde.
And it was the Sun that introduced Aimee Walton, she of the vomit-‘n’-tell alleged sex with Cole.
John Terry: Wayne Bridge’s Lover Vanessa Perroncel In Pictures (NSFW)
Alicia Douvall (NSFW)
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Posted: 15th, February 2010 | In: Sports | Comment (1)
Video: Glynneath Rugby Club Flasher Salutes Wales V Scotland On The BBC
RUGBY fans watch the Wales versus Scotland match on the telly at Glynneath rugby club did as rugby fans do and ran about with their willies hanging out. That they did it on BBC Wales Today, ahead of game only adds to the humour.
Gail Morris Jones, the BBC editor, says:
“BBC Wales Today is a live programme and unfortunately one rugby fan got carried away with the moment. We always strive to ensure that our contributors act appropriately and we know that many people will have been offended. We sincerely apologise for any offence caused.”
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Posted: 14th, February 2010 | In: Sports | Comments (2)
Tiger Woods Is An Entry Level Position For TV Reporter Rachel Uchitel And Hostess Jaime Jungers: Pictures
TIGER Woods is in and out and in and out of sex rehab and thoughts turn to women linked to the golfer, like Jamie Jungers, who Anorak spotted hosting a party at LAX Nightclub in Las Vegas. Happy days for Jungers, and so too for Rachel Uchitel who is now working as a showbusiness correspondent on Extra TV. Jaimee Grubbs is on Tool Academy. Tiger Woods is a media entry level position, allegedly. Look out for Holly Sampson reading the news, Mindi Lawton making a Blue Peter cocktail on tea-time telly presenter and Joslyn James reading the Sun’s news in briefs…
Winter Olympics: Nodar Kumaritashvili’s Death Attracts Viewers And Hope Of More Pain
THE Winter Olympics is all about the injuries. Terrible they are. The skiers taking mountains and orange mesh full in the face, the ski jumper shattering his pelvis and not forgetting the razor sharp ice blades slicing spandex. It’s the usual pre-Games compilation tape on the big sports networks. That Nodar Kumaritashvili of Georgia died after coming off his tea tray on the Whistler ice track at 90mph (144.3km/h). What killed him was impacting with a metal girder. The BBC and all new networks bow heads and lower the voice. And then it’s back to those compilation tapes and the commentator saying that Kumaritashvili’s death is a sing of just how dangerous it all is. You need to watch this!
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James De Gale Introduces Sportsmen In the Third Person, An Audio Study
JAMES DE Gale would like James De Gale fans to know that had James De Gale fought the James De Gale of two years ago he would have knocked out that James de Gale in two rounds. What’s the saying he’s looking or. No, not I’m going mad and looking for a big contract. The saying is “Rome wasn’t built is a day”… Really:
Jonathan Trott And Gareth Copley Win Sports Action World Press Photo Of The Year
SPORTS photography is a hard game. Get it right and you have the ultimate picture that epitomises the human condition. Get it less then perfect and you’ve got the subject but not the story. Congratulations to Press Association photographer, Gareth Copley, who won the Sports Action section of the World Press Photo competition for this shot of England’s Jonathan Trott being run out by Australia’s Simon Katich, during the fifth npower Test Match at the Oval, London. Enjoy your moment, Gareth, during your career it might not be bettered…
Posted: 12th, February 2010 | In: Sports | Comment (1)
John Terry Flies To Dubai: Police Ready To Arrest Alleged ‘Adulterer’
CHELSEA captain John Terry is on his way to Dubai, and away from Vanessa Perroncel. He is racing to meet Toni Terry – well, just as soon as he’s played games against Arsenal, Hull and Everton. But he can miss Cardiff city. Love is bigger than Cardiff City.
So Dubai it is. And in Dubai, they arrrest you for adulTerry, sorry, adultery. Not that John Terry has committed adultery. We have heard that as a fact here. Look, Mr Dubai policeman, JT is a top bloke.
British Couple Jailed For Adultery In Dubai
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Posted: 10th, February 2010 | In: Key Posts, Sports | Comment
In Pictures: EastEnders Wins Best Soap At British Asian Sports Awards
THE Change4Life British Asian Sports Awards, is not the world’s shortest least-keenly competed Sports awards do, that’s the Jewish Sports Awards, followed by the Saudi Arabian Women of Sports Awards and the Married Female Golfers’ All-Comers Awards. The British Asian Sports Wards featured Amir Khan, EastEnders bun wrangler John Partridge and his nagging co-star Nina Wadia, Amir Khan, EastEnders’ Himesh Patel, hurdling rapper Chipmunk, marathon enthusiast MP Keith Vaz, pro-celeb dancer Laila Rouass, Amir Khan…
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Vanessa Perroncel Backs Out On John Terry: Max Clifford’s Non Story In Pictures
JOHN Terry is sacked as England captain. And his alleged mistress Vanessa Perroncel stands at the offices of Mr Max Clifford in Mayfair, London, and tells us that she will not sell her story. Vanessa Perroncel responds after seeing that John Terry has been dropped. Vanessa Perrroncel hires Clifford and then doesn’t let him sell her story for £250,000. Who paid for Clifford’s service – or does her work pro bona (that’s a sexy pun, readers)? John Terry: Wayne Bridge’s Lover Vanessa Perroncel In Pictures (NSFW); Alicia Douvall (NSFW); Lauren Pope (NSFW)…
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Posted: 5th, February 2010 | In: Sports | Comment (1)
Tiger Woods: Your Chance To Hit Rachel Uchitel, Jaimee Grubbs And Josyln James In The Face
TIGER Woods: From In Every Disaster A Marketing Opportunity comes the Tail of the Tiger golf balls, each rubbery sphere bearing a portrait of one of Tiger’s alleged women.
Swing your wood and think of Rachel Uchitel, play though Jaimee Grubbs, any old iron will do on Joslyn James and shake the shaft of your Sabbath stick at Holly Sampson – remember, golfers, more than two shakes is a shank!
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Mike Tyson On Dancing With The Stars, In Pictures
WHAT’S the former Baddest Man in The World up to – you know, Mike Tyson, the once awesome boxer who earned £200 million for his fighting, bit part of a man’s ear off and got into philsophy? That’s him on the Italian version of Dancing with the Stars in Rome. This is what happens when you retire, boxers. You either get a job advertising deodorant or stick your name on a grill. Mike Tyson is now famous for pro-celebrity dancing and being the inspiration for naming your angry dog Tyson. What next for Iron Mike – celebrity ironing?
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John Terry Is Just Shagger Bobby Moore In A Less Forgiving Age
JOHN Terry and Vanessa Perroncel: Toni wants a divorce and Bobby Moore evoked. The big talking point is the not the abortion, alleged, the sex in the car with the Chelsea boots on, alleged, and the injunction – the big talking point it should John Terry remain as the England captain.
The papers can agree on nothing:
Fact: “FA LEAVING JOHN TERRY FATE TO FABIO CAPELLO” – Express
Fact: “John Terry’s England fate to be decided by Wayne Bridge” – Telegraph
Pictures: Vanessa Perroncel (John Terry’s Alleged Lover)
Having heard from the experts, we wonder: should Terry be captain of England?
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Posted: 31st, January 2010 | In: Sports | Comment (1)
John Terry And Vanessa Perroncel: A Mock-Georgian Abortion In Pictures
JOHN Terry and Vanessa Perroncel: Can the actual story of married England and Chelsea captain John Terry and teammate Wayne’s Bridge’s former lover and mother to his child live up to the hype. The News of The World delivers:
John Terry got secret lover pregnant
Pictures: Vanessa Perroncel (John Terry’s Alleged Lover)
She had a little John “soon after” they started shagging? You’re the low-profile England captain shagging another England players’s lover and you don’t wear protection.
ENGLAND Captain John Terry made his lover pregnant – then paid for her to have an abortion.
Well, it’s their decision, however, painful. But thanks to the High Court – read the case here – we can now get the details. The NoTW talks of a trip to a private clinic and a post-op check Terry gave Perroncel £20,000 to “cheer herself up“.
The revelation will stun Terry’s loyal wife Toni Poole, 28, and throws fresh doubt over his ability to captain England just five months before the World Cup.
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Posted: 31st, January 2010 | In: Key Posts, Sports | Comments (2)
