Hampshire Police Call For Ban On Sales Of Red Bull And Lucozade

THE council of Whitchurch, Hampshire, kindly requests that energy drinks are not served to children under 16 after dusk on a Fridays. It is stated that the high-sugar, high-caffeine drinks are contributing to rowdiness in a youth already pepped up on hormones and Facebook.

PC Paula Deery and PCSO Wendy Eaglestone tell the council:

“We have asked shops in Whitchurch not to sell Red Bull or other stimulation drinks to under-16s on a Friday evening as it increases hyperactivity.”

Anorak

Posted: 13th, April 2011 | In: Strange But True | Comment (1)

Cake-Munching Undertakers Leave Corpse In A Supermarket Teacup Storm

IN search of outrage, we hear of the three undertakers who “left a corpse in a coffin in supermarket car park – while they went in the cafe for a cup of tea.”

The SWNS report is accompanied by a photo of two tight-lipped women with arms akimbo. They are Karen Plant, 53, and her daughter Liz, 28. They “were so shocked they stormed into the cafe and confronted the undertakers”.

Anorak wonders if storming into a supermarket to accost undertakers is in itself offensive. What happened to doffing one’s cap and keeping a respectful silence?

Anorak

Posted: 13th, April 2011 | In: Strange But True | Comments (6)

Doctor Arrested For Diving While Drunk And Asleep

GP Donald Stuart Clegg is appearing at Bury magistrates’ court, having been arrested by police in Prestwich for, apparently, driving while intoxicated and asleep.

Anorak

Posted: 11th, April 2011 | In: Strange But True | Comment

Prostitute Murders Client For Having Herpes

ASHLEY Nicole Steele, 21, is the Chicago-based prostitute who shot and killed Derrick Gray, 40, because she thought he had herpes.

We join the action as Steele arrives at Gray’s home for sex. The pair enter a bedroom. They hear a knocking at the front door. Gray gets up and goes to investigate.

Anorak

Posted: 11th, April 2011 | In: Strange But True | Comments (2)

Man Spells Out 1,500 Miles Long ‘Welcome’ Sign In Croatia

SPECIOUS News of The Day features Daniel Lacko, who will crete the “world’s biggest welcome” by spelling out the word as he travels over 1,500 miles along the Croatian coastline.

His movements will be tracked by a GPS device that when finsihed will spell out the word “Welcome” across the map of Croatia.

How those Croats will love the fact that a man is using technology to graffiti an English word across their lands.

Anorak

Posted: 9th, April 2011 | In: Strange But True | Comments (2)

Students Conquer The Everest Of Toilet Paper Folding

“IT was hard, backbreaking work. It’s like Mount Everest. Of course we had to try.”

Those are the modest words of James Tanton, a maths teacher at St. Mark’s School, who along with a group of 15 students claims to have folded 13,000 feet of toilet paper in half 13 times. Tenzing. Hillary. Tanton. That is the pantheon of they who dared and did.

The expedition in finding new ways to pack enough toilet paper for a expeditionary trip to Manchester’s Curry Mile was carried out at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology, with advice supplied by the MIT origami club, OrigaMIT.

Anorak

Posted: 8th, April 2011 | In: Strange But True | Comment

Police Fight Between Rabbits And Otter Gets Interesting In Devon And Cornwall

MR Nigel Rabbits, chairman of the Devon and Cornwall Police Federation, has written a letter in which he attacks the “dogmatic management” style of Devon and Cornwall police Chief Constable…Steven Otter.

Rabbits V Otter. Who wins?

Anorak

Posted: 7th, April 2011 | In: Strange But True | Comment

Maine Legalizes The One-Armed Switchblade: Self-Loading Canon Next

IN Maine, it is now legal for one-armed people to carry and use a switchblade.

The Reuters report conjures a picture:

Backers of the measure say legalizing switchblades would eliminate a need for one-armed people to be forced to open folding knives with their teeth in emergencies.

The dangers of opening a folding knife with your teeth as you are trying to free a stone from a horses hoof or cutting the red wire on a roadside bomb are clear.

Anorak

Posted: 7th, April 2011 | In: Strange But True | Comment

Maria Hose Cristerna Gets The Horns: The Tattooed Woman In Photos

MARIA Hose Cristerna has had her teeth sharpened into fangs, her eyes injected with colours, horns implanted into her head (put in without anaesthetic) and a copy of The Dandy drawn on her face. If she can fix a night light to her nose, you could read her like a book (and in Braille, too!)…

goth_01

Image 1 of 11

Anorak

Posted: 6th, April 2011 | In: Key Posts, Strange But True | Comment

The Fabled Three-Clawed Crab Exists

THE three-clawed crab was caught by Amble fisherman Jeff Handyside in a crab pot.

Anorak

Posted: 6th, April 2011 | In: Strange But True | Comment

Satya Sai Baba Is Ill: Time To Bury The Lie?

SATYA Sai Baba, 84, is ill. In Puttaparthi, in the Indian state of Andhra Pradesh, some of the swami’s 30 million devotees are outside the hospital. Within the hospital, Baba is experiencing breathing problems. Will he be ok? Or are his airways blocked by large golden egg?

Baba claims to be the reincarnation of a 19th Century Hindu godman. He is a self-declared living god, an Avatar.

Anorak

Posted: 6th, April 2011 | In: Key Posts, Strange But True | Comment

Man Feels Little Girl Ghost In Herefordshire House

TO Herefordshire, where a photo of  Fred Smith’s grandson Sirus features the shadowy future of a… ghost?

(And, yep: Sirus. Can you be Sirus, as John McEnroe famously asked?)

Says Fred, of St Weonards:

“If she lived in an old house or if there was a cupboard with a reflection or something fair enough, but she lives in a 1950s house in Redhill – we have no idea who this might be.”

Anorak

Posted: 5th, April 2011 | In: Strange But True | Comments (3)

Mug Shot Of The Day: He Survived On Wild Mushrooms

NEWSPAPER photo of the Day features Andrew Conly, who – get this – survived on wild mushrooms…

Anorak

Posted: 4th, April 2011 | In: Strange But True | Comment

Couple Arrests For Having Afternoon Sex On Police Station Wall

DID you see the couple having sex up against the wall of Gloucester police station at 5:30pm in the afternoon? Two uniforms did.

And so it is that Charlotte Howell, 27, and 45-year-old Andrew Moore, both of Tewkesbury Road, Longford, are in Gloucester Magistrates’ Court, pleading guilty to outraging public decency by engaging in sexual intercourse in a public place on February 1.

Says prosecuting lawyer Lisa Hennessy said:

“It was 5.30pm in the afternoon when two Police Community Support Officers saw a male and female leaning against a wall at Gloucester’s main police station. They both had their trousers around their ankles which exposed their bare buttocks. The male was thrusting towards the groin area of the female and it was clear what was happening. The officers were shocked and spoke to the two defendants.

“They were both arrested and taken into custody.”

They are also charged with assulting the police. How and with what are not stated. But the pair deny any assault….

Anorak

Posted: 3rd, April 2011 | In: Strange But True | Comments (2)

Top Ten National Trust Walks: Slapper’s Rock And Kiss Me Arse Steps

THE Top Ten silliest names for National Trust walks are reveled in a press release issued by the fresh air fanatics. Will the names seduce walkers to the area? Don’t most sex fiends just hang about the car park and toilets?

The ten walks are:

Anorak

Posted: 2nd, April 2011 | In: Strange But True | Comment

Teacher Kills Petting Zoo Rabbits With Hammer In Front Of Children

AT the  Cesar-Klein-School in Ratekau in northern Germany, the kids are learning about Stone Age Man and how he used to hunt rabbits, catch rabbits and then kill rabbits by hitting them on the head with a hammer.

Says the teacher to his class of 10 and 11 year olds:

“They didn’t have a supermarket to go to. So this is how they did it.”

Anorak

Posted: 2nd, April 2011 | In: Strange But True | Comment (1)

Man Dies Of ‘Sexual Sweetness’

FLETCHER Jere died of “sexual sweetness” following a dalliance with a prostitute he hired in Blantyre, Malawi.

So says the police spokesman, who adds that the woman was used “to quench Jere’s libido”.

Police spokeswoman Edina Ligowe goes on the record:

“Jere died of too much sexual excitement and sweetness. The sex worker will not be prosecuted because she committed no crime by being too sweet for the man.”

Anorak

Posted: 1st, April 2011 | In: Strange But True | Comment

Top April Fools Of 2012: Spain Buys Ronaldo, New Air Tax And RyanAir Bans Kids

IT’S April Fools’ Day. Here are the pick of the bunch:

Zimmer Skateboards – Daily Express

British company Micro Scooters, which manufactures the new £100 vehicle, claims it was developed in response to “huge demand” from grandmas and granddads who wanted to take their grandchildren to school, but found they were struggling to keep pace.

Ed Miliband’s Knees Up – Daily Telegraph

An email, which was sent to various Labour councillors, asks party members to mark in their diaries May 27th as a “red letter day”, which should be enthusiastically celebrated. The email sent from Flora Lopi, a Labour Party official, who is understood to be one of Mr Miliband’s closest advisers, said:

“As you will now all be aware, Britain will be celebrating an event even more important than the Royal wedding in London on April 29, namely, the civil ceremony uniting Ed and Justine, on May 27. Labour members, let’s make this a red letter day, when we can show to the world that we are truly the party of unity, family and fun. In the face of swingeing Con-Dem cuts, I would like all Labour councillors, PCCs and party members to organise a street party. I have enclosed a ten-point plan to ensure this event runs as smoothly as possible, including ideas for catering and merchandising opportunities to help raise funds for the Party.”

Anorak

Posted: 1st, April 2011 | In: Strange But True | Comments (3)

Man With Scales Had Sex With Seven Sheep

TO Ghana, where Kwaku Amable is guilty of having sex with seven sheep.

Well, you beckon one and they all follow…

The 36-year-old is sentenced to 36 months choky.

Anorak

Posted: 31st, March 2011 | In: Strange But True | Comments (2)

Ambilikile Masapile’s Loliondo Brew Cures Anything: God Heals Tanzania

ANYONE who can reach Ambilikile Masapile, 76, a retired pastor Evangelical Lutheran Church in Tanzania, can get a cup of his magical brew that can cure many ailments. You just need to reach Loliondo village to be cured.

The news report is Biblical in tone:

The multitudes crossing river Engaresero in northern Tanzania is akin to the annual wildebeest migration at River Mara. The only difference is that the people in their thousands have no time to hang around the banks, waiting for the courageous one to cross over first because each second is precious…

Anorak

Posted: 31st, March 2011 | In: Strange But True | Comment

Online Lovers Discover They Are Brother And Sister

WHEN Sarah Kemp and George Bentley met on the internet, a relationship bloomed and blossomed. After a welter of emails they agreed to see each other in person. They would meet in London.

There they chatted and found out that they were brother and sister.

Anorak

Posted: 30th, March 2011 | In: Strange But True | Comment (1)

Is The Trowbridge Kebab The Greatest Ever Local News Story?

DO you know the thieves who stole an 18kg frozen kebab from La Capricciosa, by Trowbridge railway station.

Says the BBC, tops for local news and news that matters:

The “massive block of meat” has a metal skewer running through the centre…

The haul, valued at about £400, included bags of frozen chips and onion rings and 500 polystyrene kebab trays.

Anorak

Posted: 30th, March 2011 | In: Key Posts, Strange But True | Comment

Coventry Poltergeist Is Removals Man Called Jim

THANKS to TV medium Derek Acorah, Lisa Manning’s family, know that the poltergeist moving about a pink chair at their home in Lilley Close, Holbrooks, Coventry, is called Jim.

Jim, a dab hand at light removals, is “very, very angry man”. Thankfully, the “door” is now closed because Derek has cleansed the area.

Sadly, it is too late for the family pet which, as Lisa, says, took unexplained tumble down the stairs.

Anorak

Posted: 30th, March 2011 | In: Strange But True | Comment (1)

Chinese Breed Five-Eared Cats For Mittens

I SAY, I say, Vladimir Obryvkov of the Voronezh State University of Agriculture has a cat called Luntya with five ears.

It’s not joke. Says Vlad:

“The cat has two normal ears, two extra ears are turned 180 degrees and there is a tiny fifth ear.”

Anorak

Posted: 30th, March 2011 | In: Strange But True | Comment

Colombian Football Fans Carry Dead Body Into Match

CHRISTOPHER Jacome has been in his coffin to watch Colombia’s Cucuta Deportivo take on  Envigado at the General Santander Stadium in Cucuta.

Jacome, a member of the club’s “Barra del Indio”, was killed in his local park by gunmen.

Anorak

Posted: 30th, March 2011 | In: Strange But True | Comment (1)