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The Consumer

The Consumer Category

We bring you the chic and unique, the best and most bizarre shopping offers both online and offline. We offer you tips on where to buy, and some of the less mainstream and crazy, individual and offbeat items on the internet. Anything that can be bought and sold can be featured here. And we love showcasing the best and worst art and design.

Terrify Your Loved Ones With A Personalised Chopping Board

child chopping baord

 

 @francescamain has a question:

What kind of person gets a photo of their child’s face made into a chopping board?

It turns out that lots of people do:

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Posted: 8th, November 2014 | In: The Consumer | Comment (1)


Someone’s recut the new John Lewis advert as a horror movie, and it’s brilliant

Someone’s recut the new John Lewis advert as a horror movie, and it’s bloody brilliant:

 

Posted: 6th, November 2014 | In: The Consumer | Comment


Artist Turns Heavy Metal T-Shirts Into Hadnmade Quilts

IN San Francisco, artist Ben Venom recycles heavy metal t-shirts into handmade quilts.

Metal fans hould enjoy looking for familiar looking swatches:

heavy metal quilts 8 heavy metal quilts 7

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Posted: 6th, November 2014 | In: Fashion, Music | Comment


Shit Express: Service Lets You Post Your Enemy A Pile Of Steaming Turds

shit express 1

WORRIED about how to epxress you displeasure? Worried about being called a troll for stating your heartfelt opinion? Well, Shit Express will send a heap of poo to  enemies, or friends (if they’re into it).

Shit Expressexplains:

1. Choose an animal.
2. Give us an address.
3. Choose how to wrap your package.
4. Pay anonymously with Bitcoin.

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Posted: 5th, November 2014 | In: The Consumer | Comment


Serious Writers Reveal Their Lowlife Reading Habits

bad-comics-21

HIGH minds in low places. Amber Sparks interviewed writers about their influences:

“I aspire to write ‘great books,’ but great books are not at all what made me want to write,” says Mike Meginnis, author of Fat Man and Little Boy. “Some of my most formative early reading experiences were apocalyptic Christian YA fiction from my church’s lending library.” It seems ridiculous, on the face of it, that writers could learn their craft at the doorstep of writing or culture that might appear inartful, inelegant, or lack complexity. And yet it makes perfect sense. These books are popular not because of their sentences, but because of their storytelling. And isn’t that the first thing every writer has to learn, regardless of medium or genre? …

I discovered, as I talked to lots of writers, that the vocabulary of the lowbrow almost universally reflects a kind of throwaway culture: garbage, disposable, trash. Yet it’s clear many of us have never tossed out these first and primary influences—they are anything but disposable when we look back at where it all began. Whether we writers actively avoided, sought out, or just plain knew nothing else, it seems what we consumed of the lowbrow world of literature, television, films, video games, and other pop culture has had significant influence on an awful lot of us. When we were young, many of us sought pleasure in the simplest kinds of stories, wherever we found them.

Trash, you say..?

Posted: 4th, November 2014 | In: Books | Comment


Russell Brand’s Revolution: Using Rape And Hitler’s Publisher To Spark The ‘Divine’

PA-5081495

 

RUSSELL Brand, age 39, has written Revolution, a book dedicated ‘To the divine, mischievous spark in you”.

Craig Brown reviews in the Mail:

‘Russell Brand wants YOU to join the Revolution’ is the pithy way his publishers, Century, put it.  Oddly enough, Century is a part of Penguin Random House, itself a division of the German media conglomerate Bertelsmann and Pearson PLC, the largest education company and book publisher in the world, and owners of the Financial Times

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Posted: 26th, October 2014 | In: Books, Celebrities | Comment (1)


Swiss Retail Giant Migros Sells Hitler Coffee Creamer Pots

Hitler is coffee

 

Swiss retail outfit Migros has been seducing punters to its coffee creamer containers by decorating the packets with pictures of Hitler (skinny?) and Italian fascist Benito Mussolini (full fat?).

The NY Times notes:

“In coffee-loving Switzerland, labels from the mini-cream containers are cult collectibles, and producers often seek new and inventive ways to enhance their appeal.”

A Migros spokesman responds:

“Whoever made this mistake was not thinking properly, as these aren’t images accompanying a book about World War II, but rather something meant to be enjoyed with coffee and a chocolate cake.”

Failing to add, “…as a prelude to mass murder”…

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Posted: 23rd, October 2014 | In: The Consumer | Comment


For Sale on eBay: Car Seat Once Used By Adam Ant

WHAT are we offered for a mini cab sat once sat in by Adam Ant, Mr Prince Charming himself?

 

adam ant car

 

 

The blurb:

I gave Adam Ant a lift in my car on 3/5/10 here is the seat he used on the journey. Selling this as my car is off to scrapyard next week. Happy bidding on a rare item. Message me for details, it’s collection only though.

For more Adam Ant oddness, take a look at this...

Posted: 23rd, October 2014 | In: Celebrities, The Consumer | Comment


The Breaking Bad Action Figures Come With Free Crystal Meth But No Atomic Bomb

Breaking Bad toys

 

THE Sun says TOYS R Us has been “blasted for encouraging kids to ‘play with meth’ by selling Breaking Bad toys.”

Doubtless the shop could offer a 2-4-1 deal with its Toy Chemistry Kits.

 

meth

But that’s not necessary, the Sun adds that the meth is already supplied:

The retailer is flogging dolls of the show’s main characters, which come with gas masks and bags full of drug money and crystal meth.

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Posted: 20th, October 2014 | In: Reviews, The Consumer | Comment


Christmas Jumper-orama: The Hideous Gremlins And Fargo Sweats

READY for Christmas? Ready for your seasonal sweater?

Mondo have greated designs based on the 1984 film Gremlins and the 1996’s Fargo.

fargo 1

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Posted: 19th, October 2014 | In: Fashion, Film | Comment


Hatred Presents The Most Joyously Violent Video Games Ever

violence

 

THERE’S a bit of hubbub around a new video game that’s knocking about called ‘Hatred’. It is being hailed (or accused, if you prefer) as the most violent game ever.

Of course, fans of video games will roll their eyes at such a suggestion as there’s a whole host of gory splatterfests in the gaming canon.

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Posted: 17th, October 2014 | In: Reviews, The Consumer | Comment


North Korean Airline Koryo Air Rejects The Ryanair Steak Sandwhich And Anger

THE Telegraph says North Korea’s state-owned Koryo Air is thre world’s worst ailrine. It must be joking. The jets, staff and food all look fine, a world above the crap served aboard Ryanair by its barking, angry  staff. Photos of the airline comes from Aram Pan, who travelled to Juche Travel to North Korea – “now the only country in the world where you can reliably fly on all major Soviet-era aircraft in one place”.

I’ve been to Cuba with Aeroflot in the late 1990s. The guard opened the plane’s hold with a crowbar. The entire air system fell from the ceiling when touched. The seats folded flat back and never came back up. The plan dived and soared to ‘save fuel’.  But we lived. And it was cheap.

And it had no flies on the (barf!) poached salmon like on Air India.

It’s no frills simplicity with grace and poise:

koryo-safety

 

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Posted: 14th, October 2014 | In: The Consumer | Comment (1)


Along The Underground Railroad At Night

“Cypress Swamp” Middle Mississippi

“Cypress Swamp” Middle Mississippi

WE can travel down the Underground Railroad with Jeanine Michna-Bales, who created Through Darkness to Light, the slaves’ journey to freedom in Canada:

Finding that there were few visual records of the secret stations along the escape route, she herself traced the steps taken by many of the 100,000 slaves between the Southern plantations of Louisiana to the border of Canada, where slavery was prohibited. Along the way, she creates an archive of historical sites both famous and obscure, discovered through academic inquiry at historical societies and oral histories passed down through generations. …

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Posted: 14th, October 2014 | In: The Consumer | Comment


Who Drew This Massive Knob On The Banksy Artwork On A Folkstone Wall?

PA-21060081

 

SAD news for art fans. A critic has augmented a Banksy artwork on Folkestone’s Rendezvous Street with a generous penis.

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Posted: 13th, October 2014 | In: The Consumer | Comment (1)


Jack Kerouac’s Google Driving Directions: On the Road for 17,527 Mile

 

THIS is what you need: a  copy of Jack Kerouac’s On the Road map .

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Posted: 13th, October 2014 | In: Books | Comment


What Makes the Titanic Museum Attraction the #1 Attraction in Pigeon Forge, Tennessee?

titanic balls

 

ALL aboard the Titanic to relive the horror of frowing in a freezing ocean.

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Posted: 11th, October 2014 | In: The Consumer | Comment


How To Photograph Black-Eyed Children

THE BlackEyed Children (aka Black-eyed kids: BEKs) have been making news.

But how do you take a photo of a BEK or, indeed, any other kind of ghoul?

Well, thatnls to this 1979 tome from Usbourne Publishing, we know how to take snapshots of the SUPERNATURAL WORLD.

 

Screen shot 2014-10-10 at 17.17.20

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Posted: 10th, October 2014 | In: Books, Strange But True | Comment


This Advert For Thorne Travel Has The Lot

“EXCITING TIMES: at Thorne Travel in Ayrshire, Scotland:

 

Posted: 10th, October 2014 | In: The Consumer | Comment


San Diego’s McKamey Manor Is Bloody Terrifying

LOOKING for scary thrills in California? Then San Diego’s McKamey Manor has what you’re looking for:

Here are a few requirements you must pass to even be able to enter: you now must be 21 years of age (previously was 18), you’re required to sign a wavier, and you must be in excellent physical condition. Only two people go in at a time, and get this… it can last anywhere from 4 – 7 hours. They actually now only take four people through the haunted house each week.

More

 

Posted: 10th, October 2014 | In: The Consumer | Comment