The Consumer Category
We bring you the chic and unique, the best and most bizarre shopping offers both online and offline. We offer you tips on where to buy, and some of the less mainstream and crazy, individual and offbeat items on the internet. Anything that can be bought and sold can be featured here. And we love showcasing the best and worst art and design.
The Guardian aims to be all things to all idiots
THE Guardian loses lots of money. It opened a coffee shop to much mocking laughter. It lost a small fortune on an open day. It has an interesting attitude to tax. So. Can the paper that celebrated the death of the profitable News of the World survive? Grey Cardigan writes on The Spin Alley:
“I really don’t like the Guardian, or the sinister organisation that runs it. Not content with wrecking the entire publishing industry by giving away all their content for free – easy to do when you’re protected from dirty words like profit – they’re now just taking the piss by playing with Lego, opening a coffee shop and running courses for people who want to be food bloggers. Of course, that’s just what the world needs – more fucking food bloggers. Though if you’re daft enough to give the Guardian £400 just to learn how to take pictures of your dinner, you probably sincerely believe that the world is waiting with bated breath for your clichéd culinary crap-spittle.”
Do any of you buy the Guardian? Why do you?
Posted: 22nd, June 2013 | In: Reviews, The Consumer | Comment (1)
John Steinbeck on the male beard versus the female beard
JOHN Steinbeck on the beard:
I cultivate this beard not for the usual given reasons of skin trouble or pain of shaving, nor for the secret purpose of covering a weak chin, but as pure unblushing decoration, much as a peacock finds pleasure in his tail. And finally, in our time a beard is the one thing that a woman cannot do better than a man, or if she can her success is assured only in a circus,” – John Steinbeck, Travels with Charley.
Photo: This 1965 file photo shows author John Steinbeck winner of the 1962 Nobel Prize for literature.
The iPotty will teach your child to poop digitally
SIGNS that the economy is rebounding: the CTA Digital 2-in-1 iPotty with Activity Seat for iPad:
Potty training can be a challenge for even the most patient parents and one of the biggest hurdles is gaining the child’s interest and then keeping their attention long enough to properly potty train. That’s where the iPotty comes in with its unique holder for the iPad. Many young children already love playing with their parents’ iPad, and now they can safely do so with the iPotty. It provides a fun and comfortable place to sit, while learning how to use the potty and engaging with apps.
iCrap.
Posted: 21st, June 2013 | In: Technology, The Consumer | Comments (2)
Racism in the 1930s: Darkie toothpaste
IN 1933, Taiwan toothpaste makers the Hawley & Hazel Chemical Company created Darkie toothpaste. It was to become Darlie.
What the adverts didn’t reveal was that before experimenting with Darkie, the man on the box was whiter than a Klu Klux Klansman’s bikini line.
Spotter: Collectors Weekly
Posted: 20th, June 2013 | In: Flashback, The Consumer | Comment
New York City’s smallest museum
NEW York City’s smallest museum is not the collection of crap in your jacket pocket. The world’s smallest museum is Museum, a small space between Franklin St & White St in New York City. What you see is “absurdity or the beauty in the everyday”.
While it’s only open 16 hours a week, during the day on Saturdays and Sundays, the museum’s contents are viewable 24/7, lit and sealed by glass doors.
Passers-by are encouraged to call a toll-free number to learn about the 15 collections, comprising 200 objects, inside, including a series of Disney-themed bulletproof backpacks; U.S. paper money and coins so mutilated the Fed has deemed them unfit for currency, gathered by artist and writer Harley Spiller, a.k.a. Inspector Collector; a selection of objects from a fake Mars excavation; and personal items fabricated by prisoners, such as dice made out of bread, collected by multimedia artist Baron Von Fancy. Museum also offers several unique ways to experience the world: You can compare industrial designer Tucker Viemeister’s collection of toothpaste tubes from all over the map, or potato chip bags from various countries (collected by an eighth-grade class), as well as a globetrotting fake vomit collection. And that’s just the beginning.
Collectors Weekly talked with one of the museum’s curators:
In the current season, there’s a collection of toothpaste tubes from around the world. There’s a collection of mutilated U.S. currencies, money that’s counterfeit or real money that’s been scrawled on. There’s a collection from Alvin Goldstein, who was the founder and editor of Screw magazine, who shared with us personal belongings that have stayed with him throughout the narrative of his life. There’s a collection of Disney-themed children’s bulletproof backpacks. They’re things that touch upon something that’s happening in society, things that comment on where we’re at and how we’re thinking and what we’re doing
The picture above is of toothpaste tubes:
In addition to the odd or anachronistic thingamajigs that form this micromuseum’s “permanent collection,” a series of arty New Yorkers have lent their own weird stuff. The industrial designer Tucker Viemeister shares his amusing collection of toothpaste tubes from around the world, while the artist Leah Singer reveals the strange things she found on copy machines in New York City in the 1980s or thereabouts, including one pamphlet titled “The Chronic Masturbator’s To-Do List.”
View the museum’s brochure.
Posted: 20th, June 2013 | In: Reviews, The Consumer | Comment
Photos from Anastassia Elias’ book of toilet roll sculptures
IN the style of the immortal words of Sonny LaTierri, “Let’s hear it for the toilet roll!” Anastassia Elias makes tunnel art from toilet paper tubes. Her new book Rouleaux features photos of 67 works with toilet roll tubes. Here are a few:
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Posted: 20th, June 2013 | In: The Consumer | Comment
The 21 most hilarious outfits from Men’s Fashion Week – London Summer 2013
MENS’s Fashion gives until the laughter hurts our ears. We went to London Fashion week to see the men wearing what all the cool kids will be sporting soon:
A model on the catwalk at the Nasir Hazhar fashion show, held at the Victoria House venue during London Collections: Men.
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Cheltenham shopping centre opens up range of dull fake shops – photos
THE High Street is dying. It’s victim of restructuring. But until it can be redesigned to make better use of space and local retailers and suppliers who can’t afford exorbitant rates set before the internet kicked in, the high street will continues to feature empty units.
But why not pretend they’re real shops? At Coronation Square shopping centre in Hester’s Way, Cheltenham, the owners of a struggling shopping centre have been filling empty lots with fake shops. They are remarkably unimaginative. Why not have a WMD retailer, a purveyor of stains that look like Jesus Christ or a shop selling cats that look like Hitler?
The internet is winning. The old high street needs to readjust:
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Posted: 19th, June 2013 | In: Money, The Consumer | Comment
China teens wear Kardashian legs to deter perverts
HOW do you deter a Chinese pervert? No, not a question to Roy Chubby Brown’s audience, rather one posed to millions of women on Weibo (China’s Twitter). Well, the answer is to dress up like pre-depilated Kim Kardashian. Los Angeles, the city that gave Basildon the tattoo sleeves, now gives Beijing the hairy leg:
“Super sexy, summertime anti-pervert full-leg-of-hair stockings, essential for all young girls going out.”
Of course, this might just be Prince William showing off his plucked feet. The web can be full of lies. It’s hard to know what to believe.
And what about the perverts who get turned on by well-carpeted young girls? Catering for perverts is a hazardous business. Whatever you do, someone is going to get excited…
Spotter: Laughing Squid
Posted: 19th, June 2013 | In: Fashion | Comment (1)
For sale: This Game of Thrones suit of armour for your guinea pig
For sale: This Game of Thrones suit of armour for your guinea pig.
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Posted: 17th, June 2013 | In: Key Posts, The Consumer | Comment
The PartyFowl Diaper Harness for full-grown pet Ducks, Geese, Chickens, and other Poultry
FIANLLY! “The PartyFowl *Made-To-Order* Diaper Harness for full-grown ADULT pet Ducks, Geese, Chickens, and other Poultry.” Yours for £25 each:
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Posted: 16th, June 2013 | In: The Consumer | Comment
The work of Lego artist Nathan Sawaya in 17 photos
THE Art of the Brick is Nathan Sawaya’s show at Discovery Times Square museum. (That’s him in the above photo.) It is “the world’s biggest and most elaborate display of LEGO art ever and will feature brand-new, never-before-seen pieces”. If you can make a living from the toys of your youth, you’ve done something right…
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Posted: 15th, June 2013 | In: The Consumer | Comment
Fast food rebels hail the Wendy’s worker who drank the vanilla frosty straight from the teet
ALL hail the Wendy’s worker who sucked the sweet honey of Frosty vanilla ice cream straight from the teet.
And then Wendy’s sacked him:
@KaEs09 @edwinelchilakil Unacceptable. The person in this photo is no longer at this Wendy’s. We will be reinforcing proper procedures.
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Posted: 14th, June 2013 | In: The Consumer | Comment
Listen to this call of a man calling 999 to tell police his prostitute is a breach of the Sale of Goods Act (Audio)
THIS is the audio of a man calleng the West Midlands Police on 999 to say that the prostitue he’s hired is in breach of the Sale of Goods Act. He says her advert overstated her good looks.
The Sale of Goods Act 1979 gives consumers legal rights, stipulating goods which are sold must be of satisfactory quality, be fit for purpose and must match the seller’s description.
Sale by description.
13. 1 – Where there is a contract for the sale of goods by description, there is an implied [F9term] that the goods will correspond with the description.
14 . 2 – Where the seller sells goods in the course of a business, there is an implied term that the goods supplied under the contract are of satisfactory quality.
You can read the entire law here.
Posted: 13th, June 2013 | In: Strange But True, The Consumer | Comment
Brighton landlord offers free rent to any lodger who can wear a ‘realistic walrus costume’
FINDING the right flatmate can be tricky. Take this advert spotted on Gumtree:
Lodger required, Brighton
Room type
Double
Available to couples
No
Date available
11/06/13
Property type
House
Seller type
PrivateHello, I am looking for a lodger in my house. I have had a long and interesting life and have now chosen Brighton as a location for my retirement. Among the many things I have done in my life is to spend three years alone on St. Lawrence Island. These were perhaps the most intense and fascinating years of my life, and I was kept in companionship with a walrus whom I named Gregory. Never have I had such a fulfilling friendship with anyone, human or otherwise, and upon leaving the island I was heartbroken for months. I now find myself in a large house over looking Queens Park and am keen to get a lodger. This is a position I am prepared to offer for free (eg: no rent payable) on the fulfillment of some conditions. I have, over the last few months, been constructing a realistic walrus costume, which should fit most people of average proportions, and allow for full and easy movement in character. To take on the position as my lodger you must be prepared to wear the walrus suit for approximately two hours each day (in practice, this is not two hours every day – I merely state it here so you are able to have a clear idea of the workload). Whilst in the walrus costume you must be a walrus – there must be no speaking in a human voice, and any communication must entail making utterances in the voice of a walrus – I believe there aer recordings available on the web – to me, the voice is the most natural thing I have ever heard. Other duties will involve catching and eating the fish and crabs that I will occasionally throw to you whilst you are being the walrus. With the exception of this, you will be free to do whatever you choose, and will have a spacious double room, complete run of the house (with the exception of my bedroom and my workshop), and use of all facilities within. I am a considerate person to share a house with, and other than playing the accordion my tastes are easy to accomodate.
Due to the nature of this position I will need to audition all applicants before agreeing to take the chosen candidate on as a lodger. Please contact me if you have any questions.
Spotter: TheAfterWord
Posted: 13th, June 2013 | In: The Consumer | Comment (1)
Pink Flamingo couple wear matching clothes for 35 years (photos)
LOVE is… Donald Featherstone and his wife Nancy have been wearing matching outfits for the past 35 years.
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Posted: 12th, June 2013 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts, The Consumer | Comment
A User’s Guide to Neglectful Parenting – the Shredded Wheat saga
GUY Delisle, a French Canadian, has written A User’s Guide to Neglectful Parenting. In this extract Delisle and his daughter chat about a box of Shredded Wheat:
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The Choir Boy Grooming Room and gym opens in Scotland
Choir boys of the Queen’s Chapel in procession to the church of Marlborough House in London.
WHY did Stephen Wilson name his garage gymnasium at East Calder, West Lothian, the Choir Boy Grooming Room? Is he hoping to attract the key and as-yet-untapped clerical keep-fit market? Is the venue more Jim Savile than gym fit?
Neighbours are not happy at the naming and the sign he put up. They called the police.
But Mr Wilson says it’s all a joke:
“I came up with the name because choir boys are seen as quite weak, and grooming, although nowadays is seen as sexual and associated with paedophiles, is also a training term meaning preparing your body and mind for something. I just put a different slant on the name.”
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Posted: 12th, June 2013 | In: Reviews, The Consumer | Comment
Dunkin Donuts bigot Taylor Chapman becomes a hero of US lawyers (video)
RIGHT now a US donuts Rights lawyer is drawing up litigation to sue the arse off Dunkin’ Donuts for breach of glaze. The woman making this video of herself insulting employees of a Florida Dunkin’ Donuts store might look like a lazy, thick, bigoted, pathetic, delusional, self-important arsehat. But in reality she’s just pushing the envelope of the US legal profession.
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Posted: 11th, June 2013 | In: Reviews, The Consumer | Comment
Terrible tributes: The R Kelly Apron
THIS fathers day get the dad who does an R. Kelly apron, available via Etsy for $25. (The “I Believe I Can Fry” singer will not urinate on any flambe.)
If you see any terrible tributes, please let us know.
Spotter:The World’s Best Ever
Posted: 11th, June 2013 | In: Celebrities, Fashion | Comment
Huxley vs. Orwell – the comic inspired by Neil Postman’s Amusing Ourselves to Death
HUXLEY vs. Orwell: the comic, by Stuart McMillen adapts Neil Postman’s Amusing Ourselves to Death argument that Aldous Huxley’s vision of the future in Brave New World was more prescient than George Orwell in 1984:
Donald Trump honoured that his Aberdeen golf complex won six star Donald Trump golf complex award
HIRSUTE tycoon Donald Trump’s Scottish golf course is the world’s best. The American Academy of Hospitality Sciences has awarded Trump’s Aberdeen course its Six Star Diamond Award.
Back in May, AAHS awarded a “SIX STAR DIAMOND AWARD” to the Trump National Golf Club in Bedminster in New Jersey for the third consecutive year.
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Posted: 10th, June 2013 | In: Sports, The Consumer | Comment
How to pull Christina Hendricks: drink lots of Scotch
HOW the PR industry works. Mad Men siren Christina Hendricks is in coversation with Esquire. She has previously noted: “I love it when a man orders Scotch. Most women find it a big turn-on.”
ESQ: Are you an actual Scotch drinker?
CH: I am, I am. That’s how the whole thing came about with Johnnie Walker. I had done an interview with you guys and they asked me what a man should drink, and I said Scotch. I was sort of intrigued by it years ago. I’d slowly over the years order myself one. And now that I’ve been working with Johnnie Walker, I’ve learned more about it. I have a whole new appreciation for it and much more knowledge about it. I think it’s always more fun when you really know a lot about what it is, whether it’s what you’re cooking, or your wine, or Scotch.
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Posted: 7th, June 2013 | In: Celebrities, The Consumer | Comment
